I fucked up

[HerDaddyLove]

Today I hurt my little. She was in little space, and I caused her a lot of pain. She no longer wants to be my little, or little in general any more. Care givers, please, please be careful. Know your littles fears, and things that can hurt them. Please be careful what you say and do. Please do everything you can to protect your little, in little space or not. Please dont do what I've done.

 

Little One, if you see this, Im sorry. I love you with all of my heart, and you will ALWAYS be my little love in my heart. Please forgive me.

[Guest crazycatdaddy]

May I ask what exactly you did wrong? If it was a genuine mistake, something you didn't know would upset her and had no way to know would upset her, then it isn't your fault and saying she never wants to be little ever again kinda sounds like an overreaction to me.

 

It depends on a lot of factors of course, such as how long you'd been together, what exactly you did and how bad it was, whether it was something you knew (or reasonably would've been expected to know) would hurt her. If you hadn't been together a long time and doing something to pull her out of littlespace once causes her to break up with you, maybe you just weren't right for each other to begin with.

[Maids]

I agree with crazycatdaddy, mistakes happen if we don't know certain triggers.

If you had no idea it would harm her there should be room for forgiveness and grow together through the mistake... no one is perfect.

Hopefully it was just an overreaction and you two are able to make things better.

Edited March 30, 2019 by Maids

[jellicle baby]

 

If you had no idea it would harm her there should be room for forgiveness and grow together through the mistake.

 

 

I tend to disagree. I believe it speaks volumes about a relationship if such a huge dealbreaker trigger is not even made known. I think this end could be for the best, especially if whatever happened was terrible enough to part ways over. Every major stressor and trigger should be known, and if one this huge was disregarded or unmentioned then it can indicate a lot about the maturity and health of a relationship. Especially if (as it seems) she has blocked him and he is now reaching out to her through the forums. Not only could that indicate that a major trauma happened, but it could also indicate that they are unable to communicate in a healthy way, or that he is breaking more set boundaries by trying to reach out at all. 

Just my two cents. 

[Maids]

You mention a good point Ducky.

[LittleCelticLass]

Knowing that I have more background info than most about your sutuation, I feel safe in saying that you just need to take a step back, and refocus. I know you, I know you didn't mean to hurt her.

 

Try and talk it out. You got this.

[Sadie Tremaine]

So, a couple different things. If your little reacted through her trigger then of course it was an overreaction. She didn't feel safe at the time and when triggered people aren't rational. Give her time and space to calm down and if she hasn't come back to talk to you in a day or so then go to her and try to talk it out. 

 

There is validity in the fact that people should be up front about their triggers. But there is also the fact that some triggers don't become known until they happen. Some come to light as one experiences new things. And some seem just so obscure that you tell yourself it won't again, so in turn you don't think it's relevant when discussing them with someone else. So I disagree that it's on the little that the trigger wasn't told to you, if that's the case.