Why are there so few Daddy’s or littles on Fetlife?

[little1grl]

I’m just wondering why so few go on there. I saw some statistics of who identifies as what and very few identify as littles or daddy’s compared to the others. And the only group with much activity doesn’t seem to post on a variety of topics but it’s all pretty much the same topic. (Can’t remember what that is but it is mostly the same thing over and over. )

 

Do people just not feel welcome there because of their strict policies? Did people used to go on there before they changed their policies?

 

I’m just curious.

[Guest QueenJellybean]

the best answer for this is probably the other way around. 

i think it's less populated by ddlg folks who are strictly ddlg. 

because it's a kink-forum. 

& there are a lot of kinks.

 

 & a lot of ddlg-ers don't necessarily engage in the sexual side of this dynamic.

& those who do probably have more varied interests than just this.

 

so, i think it's more that fetlife is a wider range of bdsm interests, & so the folks who are into ddlg aren't there for ddlg. 

if that makes sense.

[little1grl]

That does make sense. Technically I don’t identify as a little on Fetlife. I am identifying as a slave. Because I came to that first. And my Sir is into M/s not DDlg. If there was a way to select both I would do that. So it would make sense that there are other people that do the same that I do.

[Guest Kaori]

 

the best answer for this is probably the other way around. 

i think it's less populated by ddlg folks who are strictly ddlg. 

because it's a kink-forum. 

& there are a lot of kinks.

 

 & a lot of ddlg-ers don't necessarily engage in the sexual side of this dynamic.

& those who do probably have more varied interests than just this.

 

so, i think it's more that fetlife is a wider range of bdsm interests, & so the folks who are into ddlg aren't there for ddlg. 

if that makes sense.

Not only that we hear pretty frequently that Fet feels aggressive and intimidating to the DDLG folks there. Maybe it's just not well suited for those of us in the lifestyle?

[Guest Rebecca]

Fetlife is scary

[xBabydollx]

I marked mine as a sub, but don't go on there because it is intimidating/not very welcoming feeling/and it just feels so wide. There is so much going on. It also feels very hookup-y which is unappealing to me. The ddlg group is ok, but still not very interesting.

 

Generally, I think that site is good for meeting up with someone in ur area or a group.

[CryBabyUniWolf]

Just don't want to. Just feels like a hook-up site with just a bunch of horny people. This site just seems to have more personality to me.

[Mikayla]

Some list themselves as littles or babygirl/babyboy but you'd be surprised at how many littles there are that just dont list themselves as that. Almost everyone im friends with on there or are following me are into ddlg, ddlb, mdlb, mdg, cgl, or abdl they are just into some other thing more

[Guest crazycatdaddy]

Fetlife does have some caregivers and littles among its members, but as others have pointed out, they tend to have other kinks as well rather than just being into dd/lg and cg/l. It's also, by definition, a very sexual place and so for littles who don't have a sexual side, or for asexual people such as myself, it isn't a good fit. Furthermore, there is a degree of confusion on the part of some dominants and some BDSM folks as to what exactly littlespace is, and whether a little and a sub are the same thing. I've spoken to several littles in the past who left Fetlife because they were sick of receiving messages from people who didn't understand what it means to be little and expected them to behave like BDSM submissives. Just my two cents.

[Mario]

I used to be on fet some years ago but i don't think it's a good place to find a partner if you are looking for more than sex and kink experiences. Still interesting to read sometimes. Probably many people like me just don't need it

[TwilightSparklez]

Fetlife only works for me as a little because I also identify as a slave and kitten. I'm also very active in my lical bdsm community and Fet helps me stay in touch and find out what's going on. Otherwise I am not sure it would work.

 

I actually have a bit of the opposite quandary lately. I am finding Daddy types that may identify as a Daddy Dom only because they like more control in the relationship but are otherwise very soft, gentle, sensual, and looking for Daddy/little with only hints of power exchange, or Daddies that just want to Daddy. So I suppose everyone has their own experience on there.

 

But overall I would say for someone who is strict DDlg with no bdsm overtones, the site can be a bit jarring.

[Arenvos]

Yeah Fetlife is very scary... I glad I met non scary people on it though, but then again I keep to myself mostly

[Hawkeyes71]

I’ve been searching for an app or site for dd/lg. All the kink sites I have listed as a daddy, but so far the only replies are those that are selling pics or looking for a sugar daddy. It’s frustrating for both real littles and daddies.

[Angel24]

I'm now very relieved that I'm not the only one who feels that way about Fetlife lol, I agree with every post of this thread.

[Guest gakiusagi]

My personal experience with Fetlife is... split? There's definitely a scary side, and I'm not sure if going to the website while in little space is a good idea, since it can be a tiny bit overwhelming. But at the same time, there's a good group called Gentle Daddies and Sweet little girls. It's good for personals. There's definitely scarier 'doms' and 'daddies' on the site that don't have a very nurturing approach but it's, unfortunately, part of it. 

[Guest Evil.Daddy.D]

Looove FL, there's a ton of ddlg groups there, your city probably has a ddlg group.