New Little looking for guidance

[Guest Babylynn1967]

[xBabydollx]

An alternative would be to write him a letter. Some ppl struggle with expressing themselves vocally and written aspects can help. Perhaps u can write a letter telling him about DD/LG, what it means to u, and how u hope to incorporate it into ur life (with details on expectations for the both of u). Do not watch him while he read it. Let him read it when he is ready then he can send u a letter with any questions or comments he may have. Then just go back and forth writing each other. Besides a letter, a journal platform can help too. Even texting. This may help to limit awkwardness and for him to at least hear u out. u seem to know he is quite vanilla, so I would keep my expectations in check if I was u in terms of what this new discovery may lead for the two of u. But, u never know. He may surprise u.

[junebug0325]

An alternative would be to write him a letter. Some ppl struggle with expressing themselves vocally and written aspects can help. Perhaps u can write a letter telling him about DD/LG, what it means to u, and how u hope to incorporate it into ur life (with details on expectations for the both of u). Do not watch him while he read it. Let him read it when he is ready then he can send u a letter with any questions or comments he may have. Then just go back and forth writing each other. Besides a letter, a journal platform can help too. Even texting. This may help to limit awkwardness and for him to at least hear u out. u seem to know he is quite vanilla, so I would keep my expectations in check if I was u in terms of what this new discovery may lead for the two of u. But, u never know. He may surprise u.

I think this is a really good idea! Writing a letter would also give you the chance to really concentrate on expressing how you feel, and gives you time to edit out the things that you want. It’s probably the most effective way of communicating becauese you can erase and re-write what you need.

 

Before this, though, I would recommend trying to find as much information on DDLG as you possibly can before trying to explain it to another person. It seems like a logical conclusion that you have to be the student before the teacher, but it really helps when you are trying to explain to someone what DDLG actually is, since there is a lot of misconceptions and confusions surrounding DDLG and what it entails. Similarly, try out things you actually like, so you can tell him specifically what you like (i.e. coloring, cartoons, stuffies, sippy cups, etc).

 

I will caution you though, not to have high expectations. You said yourself that he is very vanilla, so don’t expect him to understand what DDLG means to you, or even him being okay with it. Before talking to him, I would suggest having a conversation with yourself on what you will do if he doesn’t accept who you are. For some people, hiding it from their partner works for them, and that’s okay. But others will tell you that it can be hurtful, and cause them to be resentful of their partners. Either way, having a truthful conversation with yourself first will also help you draft your letter for your husband.

 

I hope this helps, and I wish you the best of luck.

 

 

Junebug xxx

 

EDIT: grammer mistakes

Edited February 21, 2019 by junebug0325