Pet names and giving/ receiving orders

[Raynebeau]

My partner and I adopted the dom/ sum lifestyle in our everyday.. we are fairly green but both parties seem to be enjoying it (almost to much). Clearly we are not completely used to it so we aren’t always playing our roles of dom/ sub. Anyways my question is, is it a reasonable request that he used pet names when establishing a sub rule or giving his sub a task? I’ve told I can’t read his mind so I don’t know if he is just trying to show dominience and be daddy, or if he’s just being an asshole in that moment.. if I didn’t explain the situation and request well enough for you to understand, feel free to message me so I can clarify for you..

[Guest BabygirlSarah1]

First   of  all  its bacikly comes down to what you both  feel about  this.  As long as you both are alright  with this then fine no problems    , If any of you  feels   its  not then you need to  tell youre dom  this ( neither   youre dom or you are mind readers  )   . The  kee ingredient  in a Sub Dom relationship is  COMMUNICATION  and  101  %   TRUST    

 

One thing  i always  suggest  to  starting  this cind  of  relationships  is  make up a  Sub /Dom  contract   were  you both   go thru and put in writing  what youre  rules and also limitations   as Sub are  and what you agree  on   and same  what youre Dom  whants  to  get  from you and what the Doms  limits  are  . This way  you both  know the game  rule  so to say .  And   of course  as time  progress  this   boundaries  may change                     

[junebug0325]

In my opinion, I think it’s a perfectly reasonable request to have him call you pet names when giving you a specific submission oriented task. This helps lessen the confusion of whether you think he is being a Dominant or just being a jerk.

 

However, I would recommend talking about it, and maybe coming up with a Dom/sub contract just to put in writing what you want. Not only to have a written agreement, but also to acknowledge that your partner completely understands what you want from him.

 

Best of luck!

 

 

Junebug xxx

[PrincessKittenCupcake]

I know exactly what you mean. If I don't specifically call him Daddy, he doesn't always put it together. It is totay reasonable to have some kind of code to differentiate.

[baby_k]

I think perfectly reasonable for ask that.

 

But: what does he do/command if you need to even consider that he might be an ass? If he really was, he could just missuse the petname too and continue acting like an ass. So, maybe talk more broadly on what you both want, what is ok and in what setting.

 

Personally for me it would be immediate stop in any scene if I get any vibe that the other person is not treating me with respect and their actions are not coming from place of love and care ( yes, you should always have the respect there, no matter what sort of twisted humiliating scene you are having/playing ).