How do I know if we should take a break?

[Simply Little]

Me and my daddy have been together for almost a year. Our relationship was fantastic until recently... he has work and school and so do I so there's not much time for just us. We live about 30 minutes apart(I know it's not a lot compared to others) so it takes a lot of planning just to see each other. We usually text all day whenever we get the chance but lately it's been less and less. I get really insecure about things so I always assume he's bored or me or he found someone else. I brought all of this up and he tried to comfort me and explained that he's just really busy with school, work, and family especially during the holiday season ofc. I totally get that but the last time we got to see each other he asked what time he should leave because he was planning to see a friend. Don't get me wrong, I want him to hang out with friends I would just rather him not take time from us to plan for someone else. I know that's selfish I guess....I just miss him.

 

Should I just wait until after the holidays and see how things go or mention it now? 

Should I suggest taking a break? 

How do I bring this stuff up without making it seem like I'm assuming bad things?

 

I love him SO much and he says he feels the same way. I don't wanna make the wrong move and ruin this relationship just because I couldn't trust him or whatever.

 

[Alaskan Daddy]

It sounds like both of you are very busy and that certainly will take time away from each other. When you throw in the holidays that is even more time away from each other. What I would try to do is to suggest that you talk to each other on the phone every night before you sleep to catch up on each other's day. Try not to let your mind tell stories when you are apart. And when you schedule time together try to get him to commit to a certain block of time you want him to spend with you.

I don't think you need to take a break from each other. Just keep telling him how much you love him and how much you miss him. When you talk ask him questions like 'how much do you love me?' or 'why do you love me?' Just try not to let your mind tell you stories about things that aren't true. When your mind wanders like that try to focus on the things he does to show his love for you.

I understand your feelings, believe me you are not the only little that has those thoughts.

I hope this helps and good luck. Please ask if you have any questions

[TheDaddyest]

breaks don't work. (99.9 percent of the time.)

[Simply Little]

It sounds like both of you are very busy and that certainly will take time away from each other. When you throw in the holidays that is even more time away from each other. What I would try to do is to suggest that you talk to each other on the phone every night before you sleep to catch up on each other's day. Try not to let your mind tell stories when you are apart. And when you schedule time together try to get him to commit to a certain block of time you want him to spend with you.

I don't think you need to take a break from each other. Just keep telling him how much you love him and how much you miss him. When you talk ask him questions like 'how much do you love me?' or 'why do you love me?' Just try not to let your mind tell you stories about things that aren't true. When your mind wanders like that try to focus on the things he does to show his love for you.

I understand your feelings, believe me you are not the only little that has those thoughts.

I hope this helps and good luck. Please ask if you have any questions

Right now we're both on Christmas break so I kinda figured we would get more time together but it's the opposite... I sleep in everyday and wake up to no texts from him so I assume he does the same. He takes hours to respond and when he does it's usually one word answers. By the time he decides to talk, it's just to tell me he's going to work so again we can't talk, then after work he's too tired to talk. However, when we're together in person he coos over me like nothing happened. I guess I'm worried because this isn't like him at all. Ofc it could just be the holidays and I'm overreacting but still I need reassurance.

He's supposed to come over on Sunday so hopefully we'll be able to talk about it and figure something out.

[Guest LittleChandlerette]

If things are already falling apart, why take a break? Wouldn't it make things worse and just hurt both of you? Maybe try talking to him first about everything that you are feeling, your doubts and fears. Then try to decide it with him because you're both in a relationship so you can't decide by yourself. And we certainly can't decide it for you. Be strong.

[Guest Aetherr]

if you are not getting what ytou need and there nothing to be done about it reasonably how would taking a break help? you want to be closer not farther apart..

 

yeah really life sucks i get that but dont you think maybe he feels the same?

he is out there doing what he has to do to make a living and pay his bills and better himself and he is clearly dedicated

 

i dont think he wants to spend what little time you guys have together talking about why you cant be together more which is smart why worry about what will happen later that you cannot influence when you can enjoy here and now with someone you love

 

as has been said above you two should set a hour or two a day or a certain day a week to be with each other watch a movie or just chat or whatever you want to do because life does get in the way but unless you are off the grid in a cabin in the woods or a farmer chances are there are oppertunities throughout the day to keep in touch and if you two want it bad enough you will find a way to make it work either way

 

thats not to say if it doesent work its the fault of either you or him sometimes it just happens either people drift apart or need from each other more than can be given

 

but if you want to know what i'd do? i would endure for my partner what they would endure from me no more or less

 

im not saying you are wrong if you cannot im saying that is what i would do

 

if all else fails.. just part on good terms and stay friends... less expectations that way and you both might be able to fine time to make it work later

[Guest DaddyDN]

Spending no time together is not a solution to not spending enough time together lol.

 

If you have a break it will put even more strain on your relationship.

 

Have a deep conversation when you're together. Find out how to move your schedules to accommodate each other

 

Make a scheduled date night for a long amount of time, smartphone free time, no distractions

[Guest FirmHand]

Ask yourself what will taking a break accomplish. It will only add more space and distance between you. The exact opposite of what you are trying to accomplish. I would suggest talking with your daddy again, express your desire to spend more time together. I'm sure your daddy will see your pain and try to fix the situation. Please remember though that relationships are hard work and require patience. It may take him some to time to properly adjust things to give his little more attention. You sound like you have a fantastic relationship and I am rooting for you both. Cheers!