When Daddy watches porn..

[LittyBitty]

I hate it!! It hurts my feelings! I have never been bothered by other previous boyfriends or sex partners watching porn. I have even often partook in watching it with them. However, now I have a daddy, for the first time, and it really hurts me for some reason.. Does anybody else experience this? I feel like this is why: I give myself WHOLEY to my daddy, on demand, no holds barred. Whenever. And always. I feel like I should be his only source of pleasure Bc how freely I give myself to him. I do whatever he wants.. is this stupid?

[Guest Aetherr]

honestly i don't think so my first relationship when i was 16 i know now i was a victim of abuse when i was treated like shit for having a problem with porn (i was dependant on it to get through the day) and from that point on i always thought if my partner was watching porn i wasn't doing my job well enough or a whole list of other insecurities so i 200% understand... you need to talk to him show him the pain you feel knowing he does it and hope he stops for you i would certainly expect my partner to stop watching porn if i asked and i would never think it was okay to chat about it casually... i may have unresolved issues over it but i also think it goes deeper

 

talk to him.

[LittyBitty]

[Guest Aetherr]

i 100% agree, but for him to tell you its your problem is a tad unfair.. is he not willing to discuss it??? if not you need to decide if he is worth it. 

i know my opinion may not count for much but i certainly wouldnt consider that very nice of a response from a partner

nor fair of me to be expected to "deal with it"

 

again like i said, you do what makes you happy all i can do is tell you what i would do

Edited December 8, 2018 by Aetherr

[Lola Step]

Seeing as it's always great to have multiple opinions I feel like I should play devil's advocate for a minute here, but I'll preface this by saying that I don't know the whole story and the obviously if ANYTHING (not just porn) is severely impacting and taking president over your relationship then it's probably best to get it sorted. I'm sure you and your Daddy have an amazing sex life and I'm sure you satisfy him as much as he satisfies you, but perhaps look at the times that he is watching it (if it's everyday 24/7 then he's got a problem) is it at times where he's had a hard long day at work? Or times where he may be feel down? Some days Daddy's just like Littles have had such a hard day that they want the sexual release without the, for the lack of a better word, (extreme lack, so please don't be insulted as I literally can't think of a better word which is why it's going in quotation marks) "complication" of that release involving another person. Hopefully this was all easy to understand, I was rambling so I'm not sure and again I could be wrong but just thought I'd share from my own experience and give you something else to think about, I hope everything works out

[I_AM_THE_SENATE]

As long as it's not impacting how often you have sex, he isn't doing anything wrong

[Daddy.Astor]

I think it's unfair to say don't watch porn because I don't like it.  porn is everywhere and guys get triggered constantly its a real problem and an addiction a severe one with most guys, it shifts your mind to the point that you can't even have an erection because you need some kind of porn view. its also really really hard to stop porn because it's like smoking a cigarette its releases serotonin like any other short-term drug and you get hooked on the feeling. even when you have sex allot it will prob not stop guys watching porn because it's like a guys private happy time. its an addiction and its really hard to quit probably harder to quit porn than most drugs because of all the triggers everywhere the whole world is pornolized. i would say talk to him about your feelings but don't force him to quit maybe its a deep-rooted problem and he will need help from a professional sex therapist or he has to try it on his own. maybe you could help him in some way but it's a slippery slope. it's the best that he tries to stop watching porn and is he feels the need to masturbate he must try to not look up porn but use his fantasies or maybe you could help him a hand if you know what I mean^^. I hope your daddy will stop porn and keep in mind that your brain needs to repair itself from porno watching for at least 9 months, a lot of forums are helpful like the no fap community on reddit Goodluck <3

[Tinka]

is there anything specific thing he watches ? Maybe he is looking for a little something that hasnt been offered by you.

 

To be honest, and its sad to say, people loose their interest after some time (different amount of time for each person) and they turn to porn to find it. 

[Bambi95]

Honestly? I don’t feel like you can outright ban your partner from doing something, without their consent. That’s confining them into a corner. As long as he hasn’t replaced you with porn or is dependent on porn then I don’t see an issue. In my relationship, there’s different rules for me and my Daddy. Because my Daddy and I have a TPE relationship, I am banned from watching porn. But this is something I have agreed to as well. However, my Daddy is free to watch porn if he wishes. That’s not to say he does, but I guess it feels good for him to know that I trust him and don’t restrain him.

 

Try distinguish between whether this is just you being jealous, or whether you are genuinely being replaced by porn.

[Guest Bunnyblossom]

The best you can do is explain to him, in various different ways, how it’s making you feel. It’s not unreasonable to feel upset about it, but it is unreasonable to project those feelings onto him and make him seem like he’s doing something worse than he is.

 

It’s totally on him whether he wants to adapt his porn habits out of consideration for you. Some people just don’t see what the big deal is, but then there are people who are deeply upset by it.

 

I guess in short you could concentrate it down to:

Him watching porn upsets you and is causing an issue in the relationship.

Whereas if he were to stop, that’s hardly causing him or anybody else harm. Ipso facto, nobody’s upset anymore.

But life and people aren’t that simple.

[baby_k]

If watching porn wasn't an issue before, I would consider what else is behind this. It's maybe oversimplification to just say it is your insecurity where you feel only you should be enough. Of course it could be the case but think WHEN he watches porn and HOW he does it. It could be something 'minor' that makes you feel sort of threathen by his porn watching. If he hides it, if he sort of shut downs for you because of it, he somehow acts different towards you, he seems more into porn than you because his mood changes a lot, he is not willing to talk of this issue with you openly... Then in reality that 'minor' thing maybe is not that minor but reflexs deeper issues to you in the rel. Like that you are not really sharing your likes when it comes to sex, you are not as open as you would want, you don't talk of the stresses he has in his life... Anything like that can make a partner feel upset as they are sort of put to side. Then it is easy to blame the porn even in reality issue is more complex and raises questions of the state of your rel. ( This does not mean you have bad rel, just that there is worry that it is not as good as you would hope it to be. )

 

Anyhow, I think this is probably solvable by open honest communication between you two. The worst issue I see here is that he has said it is "you problem" and leaves you struggle alone with it. That is not how partner's should act and that definately won't take the issue away.

 

I'd assume that if he would really listen your worries, be compassionate about it and understand you, you might be able to really talk of this ( and figure solution or otherwise get over the issue and hurt ). He could explain why he watches porn, when he needs to do it and how he sees porn's effect in your relationship and how porn should fit to your rel. Most issues disappear after both parties can truly see the other person's point of view and understand them as mostly no person is evil or nasty, they just have different view point and mainly mean no harm.

 

Edit:  insecurities or your disapointment to his actions could also be coming elsewhere than just his porn watching. Maybe you feel neglected or you feel he neglects somehow the rel you should be having because of something he does or doesn't do. And this then comes out in something that is more easy and concrete to see and complain about: porn.

 

These are just quesses from my part and may not hold true at all but worth the shot, right?

Edited December 9, 2018 by baby_k