What made you realize DDLG was right for you?

[Guest TheQuiet1]

I've been struggling to determine if I'm a little and want a Daddy, or if I just want a vanilla relationship with someone who accepts my "little" side.

 

I guess another way to word it is, I'm not sure if I would prefer a DDLG relationship over a vanilla relationship.

 

Everything points to yes. I love being taken care of (like when my ex boyfriend would cut my food for me or get me things so I didn't have to do it myself), I love typical "children's" things (stuffies - I sleep with one ever night, Disney movies, kid's TV shows, some toys), being treated like a child (I guess you could say?) makes me really happy.

 

And I like the idea of maybe having rules, listening to them, and being with someone who's kind of "parental" -like.

 

But for some reason I'm still questioning it/myself.

I've been doing research on it for a long time now, like about a year, more or less (even though, until recently, I still told myself "I'm not actually into it, I'm just curious"), and everything I've come across I've been like "that's me", "that's what I want", "this describes me so well", "but I'm totally not a little".

I'm not sure if I'm just hesitant because of my inexperience with relationships in general, a lack of understanding/knowledge, or because I just haven't been in enough relationships to really know what I want yet.

 

Or perhaps I'm scared to admit that I'm into something that holds a lot of really harsh stigma and judgment by those outside the community.

 

I can say though that in my last relationship, which lasted 2 years, I always felt like something was missing. And I was always happiest when he'd do anything "caregiver"-like. Or when I got the chance to snuggle a stuffie or watch "kid's" movies with/around him.

 

 

 

Anyways, I suppose what I'm asking is (tl;dr):

What made you realize that this type of dynamic was the right one for you?

And any advice would also be appreciated.

 

Also, just curious: Do you feel as though you could be happy without it? Or Would you always feel like something was missing?

[Laladolly]

But you don't have to put a label on it. if you're living like that and you feel like that then you basically are in a ddlg relationship. Ya know ?

 

Putting labels on things can sometimes make it confusing and stressful because then you feel as though you have to fit into some certain character or role.

[Laladolly]

If you feel like a little then you're a little! Simple as that. if you just feel as though that's just who you are when you don't want to label anything, that's awesome too cause you can be anything you wanna be

[Laladolly]

Also I'm sorry. I didn't even answer the question. I realized it was for me as soon as I discovered what it was and that the aspects had wlready always very strongly appealed to me and I identified with almost all points. As though I were going through a checklist, checking everything and saying yup that's me !

[Guest TheQuiet1]

Also I'm sorry. I didn't even answer the question. I realized it was for me as soon as I discovered what it was and that the aspects had wlready always very strongly appealed to me and I identified with almost all points. As though I were going through a checklist, checking everything and saying yup that's me !

 

Oh don't be sorry! It's okay haha

That's exactly how it was for me, basically going through a checklist and checking almost every single thing off.

So I guess I'm a little, but it's nice to know I don't need to have a label until I feel sure or am comfortable with having one.

Part of the issue is that I feel like I need to say either "I am this" or "I am not this", without any in between or other options.

[Laladolly]

Oh don't be sorry! It's okay haha

That's exactly how it was for me, basically going through a checklist and checking almost every single thing off.

So I guess I'm a little, but it's nice to know I don't need to have a label until I feel sure or am comfortable with having one.

Part of the issue is that I feel like I need to say either "I am this" or "I am not this", without any in between or other options.

Well it's cool to want to but you don't have to at all.

[MysticSand]

I relate to this post so much! My identity crises has been going on for awhile. I'm going to FR you so we can use each other as a bouncing board for our identities, if you don't mind. ^^

[Guest TheQuiet1]

I relate to this post so much! My identity crises has been going on for awhile. I'm going to FR you so we can use each other as a bouncing board for our identities, if you don't mind. ^^

I'm glad I'm not the only one haha! And I'd like that, I don't mind at all. ^^