Introducing DDLG

[sperki]

So I found some DDlg stuff on tumblr like 2 years ago and loved it. I found like I finally found something that explained how I felt both sexually and not. I was never comfortable telling my boyfriend and it fell by the wayside. I opened his phone the other day to set an alarm and there was some porn up so I looked it up later on my own. In the porn the girl was calling her boyfriend daddy and there was a general ddlg undertone however she didn't act as "little" as I guess I would. Is this just porn? or might he actually be into it. He often acts like a typical daddy just without all the context (he takes care of me, is dominant but gentle and caring, spanking etc). Regardless of whether or not the porn actually means something I want to know how to introduce first calling him daddy and then slowly more and more of the actual lifestyle or at least some aspects and I'm not sure how the conversation should go and I am very anxious about asking him. I know he wouldn't make me feel bad about it and would probably try it anyways but I'm not sure how to put my anxiety to the side and how to ask him about it or introduce it. 

[Guest Aetherr]

honestly the best thing you can do it tell him how you feel and show him the things you like, its all about communication.. start by asking him if you can call him daddy then tell him more about what comes with that, honestly though im sure alot of guys like being called daddy in bed but its a different thing entirely to be a daddy honestly by what you said he acts like it anyway so just tell him that he kind of acts like one and he may want to know more!

[Nymph]

I was a bit shy with some stuff when Daddy and I were dating. I didn't play neopets in front of him until we were engaged/living together for example haha, he knew I've always loved hello kitty but I was not clear that I am totally still into it now. I never hid the anime, but I don't think he realized just how much I binge watch

 

I tested the waters by asking Hubby casually while we were watching a movie and some woman called a guy "daddy" if he thought it was sexy... his answer was quite negative, worse than saying no... he said it was stupid. Like your guy he was already taking care of my little needs due his naturally loving and dominant personality so I figured maybe he was not into labels or titles and was a bit sad but figured I could do without.

 

A few years later here I am calling him Daddy because he asked me to so thread slowly and be patient, also respect if he doesn't like the title. For Daddy the title was too much at first, but as our sex life got kinkier I think he realized I was not just trying to please him but it was a need I had. After learning more about BDSM in general he realized he was already a daddy dom.

 

So I would suggest to either casually bring it up or playfully call him daddy while he is spanking you. I do not recommend you blurt it out in the middle of passionate sex because he might thing it was a heat of the moment thing. It doesn't have to be a life changing conversation.

[Daddybears PLB]

I would suggest bringing it up to him in a casual way at first and say that you have seen some stuff on Ddlg that sparked your interest and ask if he would like to research it with you,read articles together look at tumblr pages or topics here on the forum and even videos or pics, if you come across aspects that you both like the idea of sexually or nonsexually give them a go,see how you both feel about them...discuss and communicate as you go along so you both stay on the same page and keep expectations realistic. If he is agreeable and seems open that's great keep building from there even mix it in with stuff you both currently like to do... it doesnt have to be an all or nothing scenario it takes a very long time to evolve a ddlg relationship that works alongside everyday life.

Ddlg is a minefield of many variations and takes ongoing effort to progress and grow but don't take it too seriously or put pressure on yourselves...have fun with trying out different things and see what stuff sticks and what is best left as a trial run, honestly Ddlg transforms for me and my Daddy constantly, we go through phases of being more into some aspects over others, its about evolving and rolling with what feels right for the 2 of you but if he seems cagey about it then the conversation can get a bit more direct and just ask straight out if it's something he could see himself developing with you or if he has no interest, and then i guess depending on his answer and your feelings on the matter that will determine the direction the conversation takes.

 

I hope my opinion speaking from my own experience is helpful, i see a lot of people taking it way too seriously and rigid in ddlg guidelines and that's neither realistically functional in real life.

If you do embark on the journey together i hope you both have fun and it all works out for the best ☺

[Guest]