Age regression and rebuilding trust

[Littlekitten5432]

So my CG and I have been doing ddlg for 3 months, and just the other day something he said hurt me while in little space. I haven't been able to go in to little space since by my self or with him and i cant seem to even say daddy. I wanna say something but at the same time i donno how to becuase i know he didnt mean to hurt me but it really really did. Btw i have went throguh childhood trama and that does play into effect. Someone please help my inner little i can feel is sad and really hurting.

[Quirkygrl16]

My daddy and I went through something similar.. it took several months got me finally be able to comfortable being little with him again. You have to talk to him about it,or write him a letter about it..

[Littlekitten5432]

My daddy and I went through something similar.. it took several months got me finally be able to comfortable being little with him again. You have to talk to him about it,or write him a letter about it..

Thakies, i know i need to talk to him about it i just donno how and am starting to make a big deal of bringing it up to him. Im glad you guys got it figured out!how did you two figure it out though?

Edited September 22, 2018 by Littlekitten5432

[Quirkygrl16]

I just wrote him a letter. Gave him time to read it. Then listened to what he had to say in response. After that we didn't force my being little. He would do small things that helped normally make me feel little like call me princess, point out cute stuff. The more I talked to other littles I found myself more relaxed

[Little Illy]

*Waves* I am sorry to hear this happened to you and now you are feeling unsure in your relationship. The first thing I need to repeat from above is communication. No matter how hard or scary, you need to protect yourself, even from a mistake. No matter what happens, no matter who you are in the dynamic (Daddy or Little) you need to speak up for yourself. Even if your Daddy made a mistake and is never like this, it doesn't matter. He hurt you and he needs to know, that way it doesn't happen again.

 

Please read these two threads - they go into depth on how to communicate and how sometimes your partner has NO IDEA what you are thinking and feeling. But it should give you some insight on communicational strategies as well.

 

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/35210-psa-power-exchange-does-not-mean-powerless/ (SFW) - This is very important. This is what empowers your little to speak up for herself. This is the piece saying "Your Little MATTERS!" 

 

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/28037-communication-is-vital/ (SFW) - This thread goes into communication and how some things help and hurt in a relationship. I recommend reading this to get a better idea on where you stand.

 

I know it can be hard discussing things you think may upset your partner. But you are an adult and this is a necessary step in any relationship. However, you mentioned you have a core childhood trauma and it seems to have linked with this situation. I would recommend reading this: https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/34860-trouble-communicating-to-new-partners/ (SFW). This is a technique that helps people who have a hard time communicating verbally. This could help you get over that initial stage fright and really explain yourself the way you want to.

 

As for your little - psychologically speaking (from what little I can see), it sounds like you don't feel safe in littlespace since your Daddy hurt your feelings there. This is normal, even though it feels like the end. What you need to do is to right the rift in your relationship so this stress goes away. Talking your partner (Successfully - you have to be as honest as you can), can reassure you and comfort you. This is the best way to making your little feel safe and loved again.

 

I wish you the very best of luck

[Hearteyes]

So my CG and I have been doing ddlg for 3 months, and just the other day something he said hurt me while in little space. I haven't been able to go in to little space since by my self or with him and i cant seem to even say daddy. I wanna say something but at the same time i donno how to becuase i know he didnt mean to hurt me but it really really did. Btw i have went throguh childhood trama and that does play into effect. Someone please help my inner little i can feel is sad and really hurting.

I’ve had the same thing happen with my daddy many times actually. And same the childhood trauma makes it more difficult to rebuild that trust. Depending on the situation what helped me was to find ways to be little on my own. I still needed it to release the stress and helped let go and work through some of the emotions.

Also it’s important to remember to only be little with him again when YOURE ready. Don’t feel pressured or like you have to act or force yourself to be comfortable again just to make him happy.

But yes when your inner little is hurting sometimes you just have to help her on your own without your daddy, until you’re ready to be vulnerable with him again. Maybe if you have a trusted friend talk to them while in little space you so you’re not lonely while getting through all those emotions

Hope you start feeling better I know that is one of the worst feelings

[Cell]

My daddy and I went through something similar.. it took several months got me finally be able to comfortable being little with him again. You have to talk to him about it,or write him a letter about it..

Awe, finding letters like that around the house would melt my heart

[Angel24]

My little side has sorta been going through this lately too, but the above posts are right: you need to communicate and let him know this. I guess I should be taking my own advice tho:p a couple weeks ago i was in little space and my Daddy wasn't up for a phone call when I asked and little me got upset ,and I know I need to talk to him about it.