Guest AlisonS23 Posted September 21, 2018 Report Posted September 21, 2018 Just curious if anyone else is in a relationship or maybe not in a relationship but also has a protector? A protector as in someone who you run potential masters or daddies by before you are allowed to date them. Or even like me who is in a relationship but still have a protector in terms of he will watch after me to make sure I do not get myself into a hurtful situation or give his opinion as well. Obviously these things are agreed apon in my set of rules/contract. And all parties are aware of their role. I don’t need advice really. But more curious on if anyone else has a protector as well or maybe more than one.
Guest Bunnyblossom Posted September 21, 2018 Report Posted September 21, 2018 I was already with my dude pre-bdsm days. But I’d just talk to my BFF about guys prior to him. They usually look out for you too, just not with a title of protector.
Guest AlisonS23 Posted September 21, 2018 Report Posted September 21, 2018 That’s great! Yeah I mean I have friends too but to me a protector is More than a friend.
Guest Bunnyblossom Posted September 21, 2018 Report Posted September 21, 2018 I played Protector for one of my old BFF’s when she was looking for a Daddy. ^^ People will still do what they wanna do though apparently lol
LittleCelticLass Posted September 21, 2018 Report Posted September 21, 2018 Sort of. I have family/brothers who look out for me when I'm single. And right now, the guy I'm with isn't my Daddy. We're not there yet. But he's my protector and snuggle King.
Guest Pinkfairies Posted September 21, 2018 Report Posted September 21, 2018 I had one but he was soo fed up of me that he left
Little Illy Posted September 21, 2018 Report Posted September 21, 2018 I tend to be the Protector. I have such a strong instinct to protect and help my friends and family that it simply is second nature. Prior to Daddy and I becoming a couple, I was "protecting" a lot of my friends and a few, close, little friends. I have also "protected" Doms when they need it; I had a Dom who needing care because he broke it off with his first sub and with her went his will to keep self-control. So I would have to explain things prior to him doing it so he wouldn't hurt himself or his partners. I've also played the role of the mentor of littles/subs and CGs/Doms as well. I think a lot of people have this person in their life, but might not actually realize it. But then I think a lot of people cherish this bond. I know I did with a few of my friends. 2
Guest Arc Posted September 21, 2018 Report Posted September 21, 2018 I have a number of friends or people who I "protect." I've been active in the local community since literally the day after I turned 18, and I've had a lot of experiences and because of my nature I tend to help protect and educate many of the new people ^^ I personally wouldn't want a protector because I've been around a while and somewhat know what I'm doing and what I want lol. If I need people to fall back on for help I always have my friends in my local community ^^
Guest AlisonS23 Posted September 21, 2018 Report Posted September 21, 2018 Very true. Often times a protector is someone who helps someone new to the scene. However I think in my situation I feel the need to always have that protector there when needed even if I know what I’m looking for. Traditionally I’m aware you don’t engage in play with said protector but sometimes I enjoy having him there to do scenes with even non sexually. I think for me personally it’s a comfort thing.
Guest AlisonS23 Posted September 21, 2018 Report Posted September 21, 2018 Does anyone happen to have a protector that collared them with a protector collar?
Guest QueenJellybean Posted September 21, 2018 Report Posted September 21, 2018 i think i understand what you're getting at here, OP. i have had partners in the past that i wasn't necessarily dating with a full title, but we were definitely still in a relationship of sorts. almost like a babysitter, they'd look after me if my other partners were unavailable, give me advice if i needed it, took care of me, & i went to them with new potential partners or difficult situations all the time. i called one my big brother, & i'm in a similar relationship with someone like that now. while i was never collared by any of them, i definitely had little trinkets that reminded me of them, like a bracelet. 1
Guest AlisonS23 Posted September 21, 2018 Report Posted September 21, 2018 Cute! I’m just being curious here. I have a under protection collar while I’m not in a relationship and when I am depending on the master or Daddy and their feelings on collars. Sometimes I’ll wear a collar they gave me as a consideration collar or what not.
MarshmallowPeep Posted September 22, 2018 Report Posted September 22, 2018 I actually have a protector, though we are not so formal about it, nor am I collared as you put it. The person I'm talking about is actually Trouble and she's quite active around here and in chat. She's naturally protective of me, and I very naturally lean towards her whenever I need someone. Before I made an account on here she very slowly introduced the ddlg community to me and sent me some of the helpful posts from this site so I can just get familiar with it before I joined, as she knows I tend to be both panicky and impulsive with anything new that I come across. I inform her on most of my interactions on here too, because I trust her to know who's safe to chat with and who isn't better than I do. There's a whole lot of other things she does as my protector, probably too many to just fit in a single post. I think that there's a lot of people out there who have their own protectors, but just aren't aware of it and don't really see it like this. Though, I can certainly say that life is much, MUCH better when you have someone like that by your side who cares so much about you. 2
CodeName: Trouble Posted September 22, 2018 Report Posted September 22, 2018 Hullo, I'm Trouble and I'm proud to say I'm a protector. ^-^ I am naturally very protective of all my friends, but to me, that doesn't translate to me being a “protector” to all of my friends. I only claim this kind of relationship with one friend, my best friend, MarshmallowPeep ^-^ I love taking care of others and making sure all my friends are safe and happy, but for me- being a 'protector' is more than just that normal level of friendly concern. This is not something that happened overnight or instantly, but gradually over the years I have stepped into a protective older sister kind of role. A role dynamic that suits us both marvelously I in no way tell her or anyone what to do, but I act as a kind of “pause button” so we can slow down and discuss things. I make sure she isn't acting to impulsively, and that she doesn't rush into relationships. Any potential caregivers/significant others must go through safety checks- not that I have to approve of them- but to make sure they are honestly SAFE, SANE INDIVIDUALS. As a 'protector' of sorts if I think that something isn't safe, my friend trusts me or at the very least takes my opinion into consideration before moving forward. This goes for both little and big things. Now, when this comes to the CG/L Dynamic: I still act as the older sister. and until someone worthy comes along to take the responsibility, I'll make sure that my friend is well cared for. which I think is extremely funny because little me is in a drastically younger head space then Peep is. It makes for some pretty comical interactions when a little is giving a middle a bedtime XD However, she also helps take care of me by encouraging my little side and making me feel comfortable and accepted. ^-^ 2
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