A little reminder

[Guest Sae]

There is a difference between being ignored and your caregiver wanting some personal time and space to themselves.  Some “Caregivers” will do ignoring as a type of punishment towards there little. It’s not a punishment before any caregivers get the idea it’s a good idea. It’s abusive.  You cannot take away the rights of your little speaking to you, or you talking to them.  That’s wrong.  Its bad to be controlling.

 

But what I’ve noticed because this is became a very public ‘punishment’ people have used and lots of people have voice concern which is great!  And it does happen, and I’m not saying it doesn’t.  But I’ve noticed the down side which is a lot of people also get there caregiver wanting personal time mixed up with being ignored.

Your caregiver can’t and shouldn't be held up to a high standard that they should be able to be talking to you all day and night long. From the time you get up in the morning until you go to bed.

 

That puts a lot of strain on them and a lot of strain on the relationship.

 

People need their own space too.  People need to relax from there stressful days and lives.

 

Yes, your caregiver could tell you, hey I want some personal time, I’m going to go play a game, I’m going to go hang out with friends.  But if they don’t its fine, Please just talk to them about it in the future and be like, “hey I know you need personal time, can you just tell me when its going to happen so I don’t feel like I’m being ignored.”  everyone makes mistakes and everyone needs a break.

 

 

It’s just as abusive to make someone not be able to do anything with their life other than talk to you. Its also called being controlling, and its just as bad to be ignored.

 

I also just wanted to post this in little space because I think sometimes people can get caught up in there own space and they sometimes forget that there other half does have a life too, and there space needs to be respected as well. 

[Guest Sae]

I have to disagree, sometimes ignoring can be a fit punishment. Punishments are not meant to be enjoyable and aren't always physical punishments such as spankings. No one enjoys getting ignored but it can be a good way for a little to think about what they've done and why it was bad. 

 

Look at it from this perspective:

Ignoring as a punishment can be used as a long distance time-out session. There's a difference between spiteful ignoring and punishment ignoring. Like any punishment, there should be at least three parts to it: the lecture, the punishment, and aftercare. The lecture lets the Big tell the little what they did, why it was wrong, and why it should not be done again. After the punishment, a Big needs to remind the little that they are forgiven and that there's no reason to dwell over it. They can also give some aftercare, such as hugs, kisses, etc.

 

The reason why a lot of Daddies say that ignoring is abusive is because there's little communication over the punishment. Newbies will administer the punishment, ignoring, while still angry and won't properly tell them what they did wrong and how long it will last. It leaves the little vulnerable and self conscious; allowing for the mind to wander and guilt to set in. That's when it becomes an issue. When a little has been ignored for days, with no knowledge of the duration of the punishment that becomes neglect.

Your slightly missing the point of what I was making.

 

But I do see what you said and I can understand that. I guess in my best words would then be is, if its a punishment your going to use, please be aware of how to use it as a punishment and the method.  :3 

[Winnie]

But there's a difference between like say, a couple hours or maybe a day and say... Two weeks without warning right?

[Guest Sae]

But there's a difference between like say, a couple hours or maybe a day and say... Two weeks without warning right?

Yeah. A couple of hours is like, sometimes people need there own space. But onces it starts to go days at a time to weeks I would suggest that a chat is needed. 

[Winnie]

Yeah. A couple of hours is like, sometimes people need there own space. But onces it starts to go days at a time to weeks I would suggest that a chat is needed.

 

Okay, thank you for the clarification and the advice.

[MaybeTarquin]

Ugh my Daddy is kind of guilty of poofing a lot, talking to me for maybe 15mins and then poofing again. Then he'll do it for several days and then spend an entire afternoon and evening with me, coddling and snuggling me and I just can't get mad. >.<!

 

But at the sametime, I'm on the fence about it as a punishment. I can't be hard on anyone even a little bit. However, I do understand that neglect is a terrible thing and shouldn't be done just willy nilly because you can't be bothered.