help explain DDlg to new daddy

[*noodle*]

Heyy!! 

 

I recently told my boyf that i am a little and would like to pursue a DDlg relationship. He is very open and accepting to the idea how i still feel he is quite confused and doesn't quite understand. Is there any way i can explain what i want in a way he might understand. I can tell this is something he defiantly wants to do but i want him to understand all aspects and i'm just sorta lost in how to tell him as this is my first proper pursuit into a relationship like this. He has the personality to be a god daddy but he's quite hard to explain things too and doesn't always understand easily lol. 

 Thanking youuu

[Guest ~*~Sachita~*~]

I would create a Tumblr page with my absolutely favorite parts of the dynamic. I would limit the page to ten posts and have an explanation for what each one means to me, how it makes me feel, and how it could be implemented in the relationship.

 

If that doesn't work for you, try some of the advice in these topics:

 

How To Tell Partner/Transitioning to DDLG from Vanilla

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/211-how-did-youyour-daddy-ask/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/660-ideas-for-beginners/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/1530-how-did-you-introduce-ddlg-into-your-relationship/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/2212-new-to-ddlg/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/3056-transitioning-from-a-vanilla-to-ddlg-relationship/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/3924-convincing-my-master-to-accept-ddlg/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/4436-how-to-tell-bf-that-im-little/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/4532-talking-to-people-about-ddlg/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/4745-how-to-explain-to-my-boyfriend-as-be-daddy/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/5619-help-telling-vanilla-partner/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/5689-coming-out-about-being-little

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/5802-how-to-tell-my-boyfriend-about-my-ddlg-fetish/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/6017-new-relationship-help/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/7254-how-to-encourage-ddlg-to-boyfriend/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/8951-introducing-ddlg-to-someone-new/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/9630-my-boyfriend-doesnt-like-ddlg/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/10414-how-do-i-introduce-ddlg-to-my-partner/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/11646-how-to-tell-him-im-a-little/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/11956-explaining-ddlg/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/12028-advice/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/13107-introducing-my-bf-to-the-ddlg-lifestyle/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/14101-need-advice-im-a-new-little-and-my-boyfriend-is-really-put-off-by-ddlg/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/14969-how-to-talk-to-my-husband-about-trying-ddlg/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/14905-how-do-i-bring-up-ddlg-to-my-boyfriend/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/15347-introducing-ddlg-to-a-vanilla/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/16742-getting-husband-on-board/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/16903-how-to-tell-my-husband/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/17019-how-should-i-tell-my-daddy-to-read-more-into-ddlg/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/17141-i-want-my-bf-to-be-my-daddy-but-he-doesnt-like-it/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/17395-getting-my-partner-into-ddlg/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/17793-afraid-to-tell-him/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/21314-little-needing-advice-nice-daddys-only/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/24255-how-do-i-tell-my-boyfriend/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/24204-help/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/26545-how-do-i-tell-himcome-out-about-ddlg/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/26645-i-need-advice/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/27210-how-do-you-explain-ddlg-to-someone-who-doesn%E2%80%99t-know/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/28198-advice-and-help/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/30922-telling-my-so-about-my-little-side/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/31811-ddlg-or-not-new-little-here-and-i-need-advicehelp-pwetty-pwease/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/32286-how-do-i-tell-him/

[RavenclawPrincess]

Sachita, queen of the link providers wins again! I highly advise you look through those links and see if there's anything handy in there

[*noodle*]

OML Thank you sooo much for these links and the tumblr idea is great i'll probably give that a try. THANKKSS <3

[Guest Kerjin]

Before I commence with my ramblings, I want to set a few things straight. The DD/lg dynamic is a lot of things but it is NOT any of the following:

• Pedophilia
• Incest
• Age play
• Or any kind of fetish involving children.

What I am going to be rambling on about are my beliefs and experiences only. Your mileage WILL vary. In others words, this ain't gospel, it's just the thoughts of someone who's been in this lifestyle for a long time. This is written from the point of view of a male dominant towards a female little girl. Please excuse the use of pronouns in this and feel free to substitute Mommy for Daddy and boy for girl as needed.
 
Daddy Dom's (Or DD's) are the very epitome of a "tender" Dom. While that term may rub some people the wrong way, I feel it's a true and valid label for those of us who follow this lifestyle. Let me make one thing perfectly clear. While, In My Not So Humble Opinion, a Daddy Dom is a Tender Dom, that in no way is meant to belittle those with dominant traits, or those that feel that a dominant must be a strong taskmaster.
 
That being said, a Daddy Dom is a different breed of dominant. He loves his little girl with an undying passion. Like any good Dom, he has his little girls best interests at heart at all times. The hardest part? He does this even if it conflicts with his personal desires. Read that again. "He does this even if is conflicts with his own desires." Strong words to live by, even harder concepts to bring into real life. Here's the reason.
 
When a Daddy Dom picks a little girl as his own, he's making a conscious decision to have a child. To be responsible for that child. To love and protect that child with everything that he is. To make sure she has the best possible environment to grow and learn in.
 
And, while he does all of this, it does NOT mean that he gives into her every whim and caters to her hand and foot, even if he does call her princess. There's usually a huge difference between what his little girl wants and what his little girl needs. This also means that he will, and must, punish her from time to time. But, I'll guarantee you, it will hurt him as much, if not more, as it hurts his little girl when he does so.
 
A Daddy Dom wants nothing more than to hold his little girl in his arms and protect her from the mean and nasty world, and the monsters that inhabit it. But, since he can't, he does the next best thing, he prepares her to face that world and is there to comfort her when things go wrong. What makes this special in the eyes of the Daddy Dom is that he knows she will run to him when she becomes overwhelmed or frightened. In this case, the most important thing a Daddy Dom can and must do is listen to his little girl's fears and concerns and not marginalize or belittle them because, no matter how silly they sound to him, they are real to her. In essence, and this is one of the things that does it for me, he slays her dragons. He's her Knight in Shining Armor.
 
The Daddy Dom gets the hear all of her thoughts, her dreams, her desires, her dirty little secrets. He gets to smile because she is bold enough to share them with him, she loves him enough to feel safe in telling him, to open herself completely for him.  He holds her close, squeezes her tight, gives her the very bestest cuddles and lets her know, in a way that only she can tell, that she is loved completely, without reservation and unconditionally. She is, and always will be, his precious little girl.  
 
A Daddy Dom helps his little girl set goals and helps his little girl reach those goals. He guides his little girl to improve herself, to be the best that she can be, not only for him but for herself, making herself a better person overall.
 
He becomes many things in her life. A teacher, a mentor, a protector, a guide and, in most cases, her lover. He offers her the one thing she needs more than the air she breathes, unconditional love and acceptance of who and what she is. He is consistent in his actions so she knows what to expect from him. 
 
He will hold her and show her the tenderness she so desperately needs. When she is unsure of herself, he will be right there, whispering words of encouragement in her ear. When she feels ugly, he will look at her, his eyes bright with love and let her see how beautiful she is to him. When she is too scared to move, when anxiety wraps itself around her, he will be her safety net. She is his pride and joy, the light of his life, his comfort in life, his very reason for living. Even though she is all woman, she is, and always will be, his precious little girl.
 
All of that being said, remember this. While he may be a 'Daddy", he is, in the end, a "Dom"!!
 
I wanted to add a few more things based on some other conversations that are taking place in the forums.

 

(Thank you PrincessKittenCupCake for the following)

Being a Dom is an incredible amount of work. Being a Daddy Dom, even more so. However, it is work that a Daddy Dom relishes in. A real Daddy Dom is akin to a "car person" obsession with their car. How that wash and wax it every weekend. How they build a special garage to park it in. How they change the oil 3 times as often as the manufacturer recommends. How they tinker with it every weekend to keep it in top performing condition. How they take up several parking spots to keep it from getting dinged. How they go off the deep end if someone causes even the smallest damage to their precious. How they love that car and treat it as if it's the last car on earth. A Daddy Dom should care more about his little girl that the car person cars about their car.
 

Edited July 12, 2018 by Kerjin

[neworder]

In layman's terms, I'd tell him a daddy would be like being the appointed guardian of his girlfriend. His mannerism would be of someone out of the 1950s: makes sure she minds her manners, has rules and chores.

Edited July 12, 2018 by neworder