When an Ex Calls

[KitKat09]

Hey all I need some advice 

 

An ex daddy of mine recently broke up with his girlfriend (it was a major point of contention for me that he had both a little/ girlfriend)  I know some people can deal with it.  I couldn't.  The day that he called I let the daddy I was talking to know that h(my ex)  had, and that it had made me feel sad.  I had told my ex there was no way we were getting back together, that he had hurt me too much.  But then the potential daddy stated that he thought I still had feelings for the other daddy.  

 

Should I have kept this a secret?  How soon into a relationship should you reveal your exes?  Was I too honest?  I really liked the potential daddy I was talking to and I feel like I ruined things by being honest.  I'm feeling sad and hurt again.  Did I do something wrong?  

 

Thanks for any advice.  

[Guest Just A Mentor]

You were not wrong. Your ability to disclose the fact that your ex called shows that you trust the DD that you're talking to. How you worded it, may have the DD thinking you still have feelings for your ex, but I don't think you did anything wrong by telling him. Honesty and communication are the cornerstones in all relationships (especially ones like these), and keeping things to yourself may only cause greater problems in the future.

 

You may be feeling sad and hurt now, but keeping the communication open will help. If the DD your talking to doesn't understand that your ex is your ex, then that's his problem, not yours. You did exactly what I would have expected from any lg I talk to.

 

Cheer up. The feelings are temporary. Things will be looking up before you know it.

[Rebel]

My little and I have both been honest from the very beginning about our exes, our feelings towards them, and when an ex gets in contact with each other. From my view point, you did nothing wrong. Whose in the wrong are you ex-daddy for trying to get back together after he did a number on you, and your current daddy for accusing you of things that aren't true. You can always give him screenshots (if you're in a LDR) or just give him your phone to look at the texts back and forth to prove it. 

 

Just my 2 cents

[Guest Zephy]

Should I have kept this a secret?

- No.

 

How soon into a relationship should you reveal your exes?

- Definitely before you get into a relationship whilst you're in the progress of still knowing them.

 

Was I too honest?

- No, most people appreciate honesty and it's best way to keep a relationship from falling apart. Ask yourself, would you want your future partner to keep things from you?

 

I really liked the potential daddy I was talking to and I feel like I ruined things by being honest.  I'm feeling sad and hurt again.

- Only way to find out is to communicate and ask him about it, instead of coming to conclusions yourself.

 

Did I do something wrong?

- No, not yet.

 

First of all, do understand everyone is wired differently, as some who may be perfectly fine and understanding of keeping your exes still in your life, there are some who may feel uncomfortable, wouldn't want any exes who you've previously have shared intimacy and an emotional connection with as a constant reminder around them. They simply do not want to do anything with it. This is why this is something important to discuss with a potential partner before you get into a relationship with them. Don't rush things, get to know them and let them get to know you.