Am I controlling and a bad little?

[Just a little one]

So a person I know is in trouble and my daddy wants to help them and I got scared and was like no you no help them. I'll help her. And before I was like I DIdNT like it when daddy likes her photos and comments in stuff on Facebook because I know her and I know she's daddy's type and she's into ddlg too. My daddy's so special and I treat him really bad sometimes I think he says it's my bipolar but nuhuh

[Maids]

As someone who has been overcoming anxiety and insecurity issues - I can relate. It's really hard sometimes to let someone have that emotional power over you to possibly hurt you, but sweetie, he's YOUR Daddy - if he wanted someone else, he wouldn't still be with you. First step to overcoming things like this is to recognize you've got a problem - which you have recognized! Good on you! Not a lot of people can analyze themselves and realize that they are being unfair. Second step is... well, this is a tricky one - I know it's going to be scary but you have to try to step out of your comfort zone and give him a little bit more trust. Unless he has abused it in the past, ofcourse, then that is a whole different story. 

 

I am in a similar situation, my Daddy has done nothing to damage my trust - all I asked him for was patience and sternness. Which a Daddy Dom should have by nature. When girls flock to him for compliments because they are insecure, or when girls come to him about their relationship issues... it's hard, I don't want other girls to realize how amazing my Daddy truly is and try to take him from me, so I definitely understand you! 

 

Now I'm not saying it's all on you and that you have to make changes - he needs to respect boundaries with girls, I hope he is aware enough to realize if a girl is flirting and is able to stop her right in her tracks and make her back off or he can release his vicious little girl to rip her to shreds. If you are uncomfortable with a certain behaviour, you need to tell him that in the firmest way possible until you are able to tackle that. Baby steps to overcoming insecurity! It all stems from little traumatizing experiences in our lives so I hope your Daddy knows that and will treat it as something more long-term and detrimental.  Not only will this help your relationship, but it will definitely help you as a person. That is the biggest reward out of all this is growing as a person!

Yes, there will be other littles that he comes into interaction with, but not all littles are the same; fact, NO little is the same. He chose you for a reason, you are the little for him - not anyone else. Just because she is into DDLG doesn't mean he is the Daddy for her nor the little for him!

 

Now, about the liking of the pictures and comments and stuff - men don't think that deeply about those actions, typically. It's kind of like an auto-pilot thing. I've dated a lot of assholes and typically when they want to discretely like someone else while in a relationship, they go out of their way to cover their tracks and go out of their way to make it seem like they are not interested. 

 

I hope this helps a little bit, hun. I'm a message away if you need someone to help you along this long and hard journey, I am a message away if you need someone to give you a listen or help reassure you.

 

Communication is key with your Daddy though!

[Child Of Light]

Are you and your Daddy in a romantic relationship? Or is it platonic? What type of help does this girl need? Just talking? Or does she want to be in a DDLG dynamic with your Daddy?

 

Regardless of it being romantic or platonic relationship, I do think it's controlling to tell him whom he can or can't talk to/ like photographs on social media. A partner should never tell someone whom they can or can't talk to. It shows lack of trust and being unhealthy controlling. If he wants to be supportive and help a friend -- it's wrong for you to stop him from socializing and interacting.

 

However, if he wants to be in a dynamic with her (DDLG) to 'help her' -- DDLG is an very intimate thing and both couples should consent to such. If you are only his platonic little, you need to decide if it's a hard limit for him to be someone else's Daddy, as well.

 

I'm not good at sharing, so it would always be a hard limit for my romantic partner and I.

Edited May 3, 2018 by Child Of Light

[Just a little one]

I've never said that he can't do these thing I've never said he's not allowed I just say I don't like it but always say that he can do what he wants to I'm.not going stop him just don't like it. Plus he's my boyfriend too so romantic. I just don't want to mess him up he's so perfecting he doesn't see how amazing he is and she got into some family trouble is just the fact I know it's my issue and he keeps yelling me I'm perfect and I'm just protective I just feeling imbuing horribletohim amdje deserves so much better than a horrible girl

[Tinka]

Trust. your. guts.

[Maids]

I'm not seeing this as controlling in a bad way at all, you are just being protective - you are rightly concerned for your relationship but he needs to reassure you, you need to be able to push yourself a little bit out of your comfort zone so you can grow as a person, deeper sense of trust, and most importantly.... MAKE DADDY PROUD! One thing you could possibly discuss with your Daddy is possibly him showing the conversations - not every little tiny bit of the conversation, but I'm sure seeing how he goes about comforting her and the general interaction would be beneficial in this recovery and it would put your mind at ease. 

 

Just make sure that he has the patience and he cannot get aggressive with you in touchy situations like this, behaviour like yours is common and has more than likely stemmed from a bad reputation of Daddies or just people in general. You are not a horrible little, at all, these insecurities do not water down who you are as a little - it could be traumatic experiences being magnified because you finally have someone whom you care deeply for and you are afraid of losing said thing because you haven't had something like this. Don't quote me on that though, I don't know your full story, I'm just being my empathetic self!

 

My Daddy and I have this little friend group and he has always been the go-to for a lot of people because he is kind of a dinosaur (age lol) and he is quite intelligent, so naturally, people will come to him about their issues but not because they want to slide in his DMs or anything, but just because he is a great listener and offers amazing advice.    I brought up similar concerns to him in a mature and calm way and we discussed at length to reassure eachother that we love eachother and that we are the only ones for eachother. Not only is that a common insecurity among a lot of relationships, but it's magnified a bit with me because I struggle with mental health issues, so it's not the most pleasant thing to deal with! 

 

Just because you have some insecurities doesn't make you less of a great person and undeserving of a good Daddy, it just means that your Daddy is going to get quite the reward for helping you overcome these issues. I could understand more if she was coming to him about like "Help me get into littlespace!" you know, stuff like that which actively involves DDLG; but it's just family stuff and it doesn't require anything but words of support. He doesn't have to do any gestures or actions of any sort, words will get her by.

 

I am insanely possessive over my Daddy - what's mine is mine, bippity bop the fuck off my Daddy   BUT, we all need friends for support! If it helps to reassure you more, you could possibly befriend her and it would help you both along the way. Little friends are fantastic ! She needs someone to support her, you need someone to support you, it's a recipe for a friendship to grow! 

 

Sure, I get a little grr when girls come to my Daddy for words of support but then I remember ... "wow, a lot of people trust my Daddy enough to come to him about x,y,z ... I have a fantastic Daddy - I'm so proud of myself for acquiring such a fantastic Daddy. I'm proud of him for being such a great person amongst all the garbage people in this world nowadays."

[Child Of Light]

I've never said that he can't do these thing I've never said he's not allowed I just say I don't like it but always say that he can do what he wants to I'm.not going stop him just don't like it. Plus he's my boyfriend too so romantic. I just don't want to mess him up he's so perfecting he doesn't see how amazing he is and she got into some family trouble is just the fact I know it's my issue and he keeps yelling me I'm perfect and I'm just protective I just feeling imbuing horribletohim amdje deserves so much better than a horrible girl

 

Right. I would see see an issue with that. When you say 'I don't like it' that's basically telling him no. As what partner wants to do things his partner disagree's with them doing? It's basically walking on egg-shells and making the partner feel bad (i.e swaying them not to). Whilst communication is good, lack of trust is also bad. You don't want him talking to the person because you lack trust that he wouldn't start a DDLG relationship with them. If my partner ever told me he didn't want me to talk to someone in fear I'd claim them as my new daddy, I would be super offended and hurt.

[Just a little one]

He doesn't understand what flirting is a different girl was flirting with him right in front of Me and he was going along with it and she was obviously flirting and the thing Is the girl in question the one who's into.ddlg he.didnt know her before he met me she was with my friend and that's how we all met up. I'm fortunate enough to live with my daddy sometimes it gives me more anxieties that I'm not good enough because he's a switch and I can't be dominant in the slightest but he's fine with that I just don't think I'm the best person for him

[neko]

If your daddy thought you weren't good enough he wouldn't be with you.