How to know if your ready for a daddy

[GabiAA]

Hi there...

 

   So I recently got a Dom/Daddy and personally I don't think I'm ready for it. 

   I struggle with Depression Anxiety DPD (Struggle of being alone) PTSD and Trauma. 

 

  I  don't know what to do he want to train me and I get that but I told him I didn't know if I was ready for this and he was like "I think you're ready you want to feel protected and loved". I want that honestly I just don't think having a master/dom is the best way to deal with things. Maybe I need to start with a caregiver or a daddy.

     I was so anxious when we first started and I had no many negative thoughts and I just don't know if this is the best idea I want to have a daddy and a dom I really do. I just don't think a master or dom would be the best idea.

  He keeps telling me I have potential and I just don't see it I'm just really scared and I don't know if I should tell him. I'm just scared like I said. I mean I don't even know what he looks like let alone how old or his name.      Fudge Muffins!

I know I'm saying this for the third time but I'm scared like extremely scared and ughhhh I just don't know what to do...Help, please

[Little Illy]

First and Foremost: Gabi, it is okay to get into a relationship and realize it is TOO much, there is NOTHING wrong with this. Espeically because you conveyed this to your partner.

 

What you need to do is listen to your instinct. If you feel you are not ready for this, then you need to trust what your heart and body are telling you. If he isn't understanding of that, he may not be the correct Daddy for you.

 

Daddy and I had to go Vanliia when I moved here. The move and rules/training were all too much for me. Too overwhelming. Daddy and I just stepped back to only being best friends and boyfriend/girlfriend. He was receptive of my mental state and respected it. We are now implementing the dynamic again and it feels so much more natural.

 

Your Daddy (or future Daddy) needs to understand taking baby steps may be essential. That training can't happen right away and most importantly - respect if you are not ready.

 

Sit down and have a conversation with him and make sure he is not in Daddyspace of thinking within the dynamic. It needs to be a serious, adult-to-adult conversation. And maybe it will help him and things will be great!! That is such a high possiblilty! But so is he being impatient, in which you need to do what is best for your and your health.

[Guest danithedragonborn]

Hey! I've been in that kind of situation before. Having a dom and having a daddy is super emotional and it's so hard if you feel like you get "dropped." I'm not certified in anything, but if you're having doubts its probably for a reason. I'm sure it's even hard if you struggle with the conditions that you said.

 

If this person wants to be your Dom, Daddy, or Master, you have to be able to be super open with them. If they are pushing those roles on you, maybe it isn't the right person. Or maybe its just too soon. You should always listen to your gut, especially if they aren't even Daddy yet.

 

I understand that this is super hard. Be safe. Feel free to message me if you need any more help! <3

[Lil' Miss Dolly]

OK, so.. from a sub/slave view.. if he's being pushy about it even after you have expressed not being 110% sure about taking on a master/Dom I am going to go out on a limb and say maybe he isn't ready to be a Dom either. No CG here is going to say that pressuring or coercing someone into a dynamic is okay. This is about growth and the journey ... Not the destination. A good Dom will want to earn that submission... Not demand it. Experienced CGs will make you want to submit and be vulnerable to/with them. You will be ready for a Daddy when a Daddy can show you he deserves that respect. They will never ask - they don't need to.

[BabyFennecFox22]

 

 

OK, so.. from a sub/slave view.. if he's being pushy about it even after you have expressed not being 110% sure about taking on a master/Dom I am going to go out on a limb and say maybe he isn't ready to be a Dom either. No CG here is going to say that pressuring or coercing someone into a dynamic is okay. This is about growth and the journey ... Not the destination. A good Dom will want to earn that submission... Not demand it. Experienced CGs will make you want to submit and be vulnerable to/with them. You will be ready for a Daddy when a Daddy can show you he deserves that respect. They will never ask - they don't need to. 

 

I completely agree with this. Also, it is completely up to you. If you don't feel ready, then give yourself time. 

[Guest SUeB]

So he's trying to tell you what you need, against your own better judgement. Step away. This smacks of pushiness and a lack of any real concern or care for you. It's do common with the pretend doms. Tell him you know your mind better than he does, and say goodbye. His attitude is just one big red flag.

[Guest BabyPeach]

 I mean I don't even know what he looks like let alone how old or his name.      

 

You shouldn't even be to the DD phase if you know nothing about him.  Don't let him manipulate you.  Don't be afraid to tell another adult anything.  Remember, you are also an adult.  If you need to end it, end it.  You are the only person on this planet who will advocate for YOU.  Never be pushed into something that is making you feel afraid and/or uncomfortable.  Remember, you don't owe this man anything.

 

Also, I think you should get to know someone on a friendly level first and that would mean knowing their name (never give out your last name or address to anyone unless you have known them a long time and totally trust them.......even then be extremely cautious) and age.  You should also know what they look like.  It's a red flag that he's pushing hard and fast.

Edited April 22, 2018 by BabyPeach

[Guest SUeB]

Wait, you don't know what he looks like, his name or how old he is? And i thought it sounded bad already! Get rid of this joker. He's playing. Nothing more.

[Guest CaptainAmerica97]

He sounds like he is he is just playing around. I know the scared feeling you are talking about because i get that. And i have been in a relationship for a few months now. We still have things to talk about but other wise i am happy with him. But with the guy i met on here, he told me his name, sent me a picture, and even met me in at a restaurant just so we could meet and before we started going out for real and that was about 2 3 months ago maybe more. You just handle it the way you can. Thats all you can do. I know it helps to have a friend to help with the panic attacks or even just feeling scared.