Heartthrobgoof Posted April 19, 2018 Report Posted April 19, 2018 Hello! I believe that the communication and the discussion is the solution of everything! There are a lot of time that you start a new friendship or you want to know better each other. When you are in a long distance situation the only way is the "magic" videocall.You decide with her to make this step. And then you start.. but you realize that the little is feeling awkward. You have tried to do your best to make her feel relaxed. What's next? How could you handle with this emotion? Personally, after many tries to calm her I am feeling awkward too ... sorry for my english...
Guest Little Otter Posted April 19, 2018 Report Posted April 19, 2018 I feel self conscious about muh face unless Im in little space. So maybe keep her in little space until shes more comfy? 1
Heartthrobgoof Posted April 19, 2018 Author Report Posted April 19, 2018 (edited) I feel self conscious about muh face unless Im in little space. So maybe keep her in little space until shes more comfy? Giving time to your little is a priority.Do not you think that if you feel like that you have discuss it first? To keep awkwardness out of conversation it is hard pff Edited April 19, 2018 by Heartthrobgoof
Guest Little Otter Posted April 19, 2018 Report Posted April 19, 2018 Giving time to your little is a priority.Do not you think that if you feel like that you have discuss it first? To keep awkwardness out of conversation it is hard pff Well firstly... Im not totally sexual when Im little. There is a sexual component, but 90% Im not. So its not like a sexual engagement when Mommy makes me feel little. Its just Im silly and cute and carefree.
CaresAlot Posted April 19, 2018 Report Posted April 19, 2018 Find a way to make the camera less of the conversation. If its just camera to camera she is probably feeling out of her comfort zone. If possible and she can be on her bed with stuffies that helps. Maybe a blanket fort where she is not just all about the camera. If you don't have that option then have stuffies around where ever she is calling from. Of a coloring book, sippy cup or anything that helps her stay in that comfort zone, that takes some of the focus off the camera. She can color while the two of you talk, if that is something she likes to do. In that same vein, make yourself less about the camera and more about if she was right there. If you have a favorite spot that you would like to cuddle - the bed, recliner, couch, a blanket on the floor. If you have something new to send her or something that she gets to have when you are together bring that around. If you color while you talk with her, it lets her be more like she was there with you. Try to do things that are less about words and more visual. If she has been a good girl have a chart that she can see and you can put stickers on. Have a time that you are going to call and make sure to be on time. This lets her get into her Little space before you call. A picture is worth a 1,000 words. Put those images to work and make it less about the words and more about the visual. If not then you might as well just talk on the telephone. You cannot be there, but try to find things that make it feel closer. Once these gets established, lots of other things can take place if you want to because it becomes the two of you and the camera is just there. 3
Guest BabyPeach Posted April 20, 2018 Report Posted April 20, 2018 (edited) Keep the calls shorter at first. Let her feel awkward. Try not to point it out. She will eventually feel comfortable. I am very shy at first when I meet someone....even in person. I just have to have time to feel comfortable while I'm getting to know someone. I mean, communication is great but you can't "talk" someone into feeling at ease. It's just a natural progression. Edited April 20, 2018 by BabyPeach 1
spankings and candys Posted May 1, 2018 Report Posted May 1, 2018 My solution is pretty basic, put time limits on, example, say start at 5 mins, set timer and at the 5 min mark just say time is up for today and ill call u tomorrow, if u think of something during or after the time limit, write it down, maybe listen to ur little and write down questions u would like to know more of, maybe less time trying to find conversation and more time listening, when conversation dies down, fire a question at her. i found this works well at the start and as time goes on u can be comfortable to end conversations 20 mins, an hour and a half in etc and its pretty normal. when u start getting a bank of questions up or things run smoother, increase times... good for initial meets and it puts a value on time, its not quantity but quality IMO 1
Heartthrobgoof Posted May 11, 2018 Author Report Posted May 11, 2018 Find a way to make the camera less of the conversation. If its just camera to camera she is probably feeling out of her comfort zone. If possible and she can be on her bed with stuffies that helps. Maybe a blanket fort where she is not just all about the camera. If you don't have that option then have stuffies around where ever she is calling from. Of a coloring book, sippy cup or anything that helps her stay in that comfort zone, that takes some of the focus off the camera. She can color while the two of you talk, if that is something she likes to do. In that same vein, make yourself less about the camera and more about if she was right there. If you have a favorite spot that you would like to cuddle - the bed, recliner, couch, a blanket on the floor. If you have something new to send her or something that she gets to have when you are together bring that around. If you color while you talk with her, it lets her be more like she was there with you. Try to do things that are less about words and more visual. If she has been a good girl have a chart that she can see and you can put stickers on. Have a time that you are going to call and make sure to be on time. This lets her get into her Little space before you call. A picture is worth a 1,000 words. Put those images to work and make it less about the words and more about the visual. If not then you might as well just talk on the telephone. You cannot be there, but try to find things that make it feel closer. Once these gets established, lots of other things can take place if you want to because it becomes the two of you and the camera is just there. I agree with you point of you! Communiction is the key in every relationship
Guest AMS23 Posted August 27, 2018 Report Posted August 27, 2018 So my first time video chatting I was so nervous I cried. I was shaking. I didn’t know what to say. It was like I was frozen. My ex actually did a good job of helping me out of it though. Helped me relax. After that all I could do was smile huge. He asked questions. Reassuring me it was ok. Be brave. Helping ease the awkwardness I’d say is yeah about communication and understanding and for me it was how smooth and calm he was.
Little Illy Posted August 27, 2018 Report Posted August 27, 2018 How do you make your little feel more relaxed? Ask her. It is literally that simple. IF you two are familiar: "Hey little one, I see you're shaking a bit or cant keep eye contact. Are you okay? Do you need a break, would typing be easier right now?" If you two are not familiar: "Hey [name], it looks like you might be a bit uncomfy. I don't want that. Is there anything I can do to help you?" We cannot tell you what will work for her because we are not her. You say over and over that communication is key, yet have you discussed this with her? She will be able to give you far better answers and ideas than we ever will. But COMMUNICATION IS KEY has always been my motto, the slogan I shove down potential couple's throats because communication is the foundation of any relationship or friendship. You will never have either without it. So do as you say, and communicate with her. https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/28037-communication-is-vital/ (SFW) Here is something I wrote about communication - maybe show it to her and she might understand you cant read her mind. Maybe you should read it as it might help understand that the first person to go to with these things is the person you are working it through with.
Guest hurtlocker Posted August 28, 2018 Report Posted August 28, 2018 The most important aspect: smile. No matter what. Smiles makes people less awkward and more confident. Think about yourself. When someone smiles at you, you feel better and more engaged with that person. You are more inclined to share the smile. Don't laugh, but just always smile and most importantly, in a genuine way. Smile because you feel it. And if there is silence, don't be afraid to be the one filling it. Talk and smile, tell her about your day, your thoughts, your dreams and fears. Smiles and talk will come back your way if you lead the way. Talk and smile. 1
Guest AMS23 Posted August 28, 2018 Report Posted August 28, 2018 Smiles are the best! Especially when it’s a nice one. 1
Guest Longlegs Posted September 2, 2018 Report Posted September 2, 2018 The very first video call I ever did was... well, extremely awkward.Neither of us was saying anything and she was just staring at me. And I have little love for being stared at, so I ended up stuttering gibberish at her, which made her laugh. Just like that, all tension was gone. In the years since, I've never been in a call that wasn't made easier by my goofing off. 1
Daddy Mav Posted September 6, 2018 Report Posted September 6, 2018 Me and my little found each other online, we then progressed to snap and WhatsApp but still only texting we spoke for hours each day till we both knew each other very well ( as a DD/cg it is essential to fully understand the needs and wants of your little also your needs) we then progressed to sending face pics , then audio files so by the time we actually talked we knew and loved each other it seemed second nature eventually when we met it was as if we were never apart and I’d only gone away for a few days. Sadly it is no longer but the right person is out there for you , never lie , discuss everything because mommies and DD/cg have life stresses and problems too , it’s a two way street and your precious little should and will be there for you too
Daddy Mav Posted September 6, 2018 Report Posted September 6, 2018 Me and my little found each other online, we then progressed to snap and WhatsApp but still only texting we spoke for hours each day till we both knew each other very well ( as a DD/cg it is essential to fully understand the needs and wants of your little also your needs) we then progressed to sending face pics , then audio files so by the time we actually talked we knew and loved each other it seemed second nature eventually when we met it was as if we were never apart and I’d only gone away for a few days. Sadly it is no longer but the right person is out there for you , never lie , discuss everything because mommies and DD/cg have life stresses and problems too , it’s a two way street and your precious little should and will be there for you too
Guest Arc Posted September 7, 2018 Report Posted September 7, 2018 When I first started online with my old hypnotist (not the same thing, I know) I was so afraid of being on cam. We started with him on voice and me listening, and progressed to him on video and me watching and talking, to me on video too. I felt better because I got to know and trust him more and see what he was like and know that I was safe. Perhaps you could ask if something like that would make her more comfortable? There are other good suggestions above. That's just what worked for me ^^
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