New to the site and Nervous

[KitKat09]

Hi all, 

 

So I made my general introduction post on the introductions forum but I have some questions and wanted to get some feed back.  So here goes. 

 

Should I add someone just because they friend requested me?  I feel like people who have too many friends are just clicking and adding but then I don't want to not have any 'friends' and make people think I'm frigid.  (Am I over thinking this?) 

 

I'm a late bloomer in most respects of life, I grew up pretty sheltered, and as such I'm not the best at flirting/ knowing if someone is interested....there's also the fact that I'm super guarded and have walls up. Also the fact that I've  been ghosted before so those walls are built like Fort Knox....and I'm still a virgin at 27.  Does anyone else have any or all of these issues?  Any advice?  I want to find my daddy and be happy but it gets hard to open up to people when you've been ghosted before. 

 

Lastly, are there any warning signs/red flags that I should look for, things that I should know right away are wrong.  (I know if someone requests nudes, if someone wants to meet right away, but just wanted to throw this out there and see.) 

 

Thanks in advance. 

xoxo

[Guest littlegirl707]

Well I have added people and we just talk. Just be honest with people. I have told everyone I just want friends right now. I like being able to talk to people like me. Yeah be careful too ur gut will tell you. Hi hope your day is great.

[CaresAlot]

There is no full proof system but you are off to a good start.  Things I look at are why do they want to be friends, did we chat or did they comment on a post.  Look at what they have in their profile - the more that is there the more effort that they are putting into it.  There are some that are not good at writing, but its just one of those red flags.  How long have they been a member, if it was from a few hours ago or real recent is another red flag.  Usually, the longer you are here the more you have invested in learning and meeting the different people on here.

 

You may exclude some that might be all right, but you have to find your comfort zone.

[neko]

The big thing to remember is that people cannot PM you unless you are friends with them. So unless you come across them in the chatroom or strike up a conversation in a post, you cant really talk to them.

[Notwhoyouthink]

26 year old shelterd virgin here too, As for friends im in the same boat, Not sure who is adding me somtimes. I do find if i talk to them in chat first im more willing to add them

[Guest You're adorable.]

My advice would be to just try to talk. It woud be best to try the chat here. Just look around, see if something interesting is going on (usually isn't ) and try to "put yourself" out there. I am not saying you should be shouting and begging for attention, but be a little more assertive when making friends. People don't know how interesting or nice, kind, etc... you are if you won't let them know and find out.

And yes, you are probably overthinking this. I mean, what is the problem with just talking to people and getting perspective from all kinds of characters. Just try to keep and open mind.

 

I think that when starting to talk to any potential daddy, (or just friend for that matter) just make sure to let them know about your situation. Most people that are interested will try to anjust to you and try to make you feel comfortable talking to them.

And yes, ghosting is an ongoing issue in this communities. Which is why you should talk to as many people here as possible to get a "compass" and learn to somehow differentiate between certain character traits that are present in people who should be considered as good daddies or friends.

It takes practice however, so don't be afraid to talk.

 

Aside from the obvious red flags that you mentioned, there is not really any clear way to tell. As i wrote in a previous paragraph, you have to build a "compass". But you can never be truly sure. Nobody ever can. But this shouldn't discourage you from searching for your perfect daddy. Just rememver to judge objectively and don't jump to conclusions. That's about it I think.