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exploring ddlg and littlespace/ dynamic evolving


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Posted

So after talking to with an amazing Daddy that it unfortunately did not work out with, has me thinking.

 

I'm exploring the abdl side of things, because on rare occassions I do feel really young. So I do wear them when that happens,I don't use them or anything but it's comforting. It's not something i'm fully on board with nor do I need from the relationship.

 

But he raised the point of if you can't explore all sides of yourself with your little or daddy are the really the right person?

 

Yes, because unlike my little side that's a very big and important side of myself, that I've been aware of for years and have accepted...and something that won't change or be "grown" out of unlike the things I like or dislike during that space. That doesn't have anything with them being the right person and more of me figuring out my likes amd dislikes.

 

What my little space includes can definitely change depending on who i'm with, how I feel, or the situation but it i'm still a little.

 

I don't need my paci's,sippy/bottles, etc. to be a little since it's how I feel. Do I like my paci? of course, do I like my sippy's? Of course, but if there comes a point that I don't use them anymore than that's what happens.

 

I think it's different when you fully accept it's importance or need it in your relationship, by all means then discuss it because it needs to be done and if you choose to explore it with your little or daddy that's great. but you should also be able to explore things and figure it out for yourself too and decide.

 

I would like to hear some other opinions and perspectives~

 

Do you guys think you need to explore everything with you partners? Can you keep certain aspects to a degree out without it being an issue?

What happens when your dynamic evolves?

Any littles figuring out their littlespace and what their likes/dislikes are?

 

The musings of a sleep deprived little lol

  • Like 1
Guest aphroditelaughs
Posted (edited)

There are definitely aspects of my little self that I hid from Daddy. Longterm/serious relationships involve compromise anyway and I made that choice because I knew those things made him uncomfortable. Not exploring every possible thing hasn't hurt us in any way. But at the same time, we give each other room to ask questions and discuss hypothetical situations. If I REALLY wanted to bring it up I could.

 

I used to really love playing with dolls and using a paci. I STILL haven't told him about those things, but we've been toggether so long/I haven't used them in so long that I don't really want them anymore. As far as evolving, it just happens so I don't notice it right away. I think of it like...if our relationship is changing or growing it's because we are changing or growing as people.

Edited by aphroditelaughs
  • Like 2
Posted (edited)

That's what I figured too, i'm not expecting anyone to agree with or enjoy everything that I like and enjoy.

 

I could understand where he was coming from...but it was more than a matter of trust or concern on whether their the right person. Because I can still trust you and respect your boundaries and comfort levels by not involving you when you don't feel comfortable with something and vice versa.

 

I orginally didn't like using my paci or sippy cups and I love those now, certain things I like now I definitely did not like in the beginning.

 

I don't like to confine myself into a box and I like being able to explore by myself, as well as with other but not for everything lol it's the same for my likes outside of kinks as well.

Edited by SeraMoon
  • Like 1
Posted

I feel like it's like nearly every aspect of relationships: there must be balance, and sometimes that means compromise.

 

Exploring your likes and dislikes with another person is something to be enjoyed, but you also have to balance it out and look at the other point of view to be sure that you aren't making your partner needlessly uncomfortable. At the same time, I think you should have some freedom to explore what excites you and what doesn't -- I think with good communication and a few compromises, agreements can be met.

  • Like 1
Posted

Be proud of your Little self. Don’t let anyone make you feel creepy, stupid, or the bad kind of weird. The fact is, everyone has something odd about them. Some may choose to hide it, out of fear of judgment. If you choose to show off your odd side, it shows courage in yourself, trust in yourself, Love of yourself.

Being Little is therapeutic. It’s fun. It’s unique, it’s innocent, it’s relaxing. Being Little is fulfilling, harmless, and essential to some of our lives.

There are also a lot of people who are in fact Little, or age regressors, without even knowing it. It doesn’t matter to what extent or how often or involved you get. If you consider yourself Little any amount of the time, you’re in the club. We are an open, chill, like-minded folk. We don’t judge.
 

Posted
I'm in the same sort of boat as u lol, as in exploring those aspects and that my interests in various 'little' things definitely changed and evolved overtime. As for ur questions, I don't think u need to explore everything with ur partner. As beautiful as it is to find someone who matches u, it is impossible to find someone who is 100% into everything that u are and vice versa. I think of it like vanilla relationships, a couple can match really well but he may be obsessed with harry potter and she may not care about it. He may love to hike and do outdoorsy stuff and she may be a couch potato. It doesn't mean he can't go hike alone by himself or go to harry potter conventions alone. It doesn't mean the couple can't work out. DD/lg is the same way. Some things u can enjoy or explore alone if ur partner is just not interested. The key is to know the difference between what u need, want, and what u are ok without. Like a person may 'need' to have a Daddy dynamic, may 'need' a sadistic partner, and may 'want' someone into ADBL. Since they only 'want' ABDL they may be ok with a partner who doesn't want it, but would never consider a partner who isn't a Daddy because they 'need' it. As long as u and ur partner are getting what u need, and u are ok not getting what u 'want' then you're still a good match in my eyes. If something u previously only 'wanted' evolves into a 'need' then u can discuss it with ur partner to see if they are willing to compromise with u. If they are not willing to compromise with u, then this is the time where some may stick it out or decide to leave because now their 'needs' are not being met and now they are incompatible/not a good match. Ppl change and evolve with time, and sometimes that can pull ppl closer or u can outgrow each other/fall apart.

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