Advice for little or not so little problems

[Winnie]

Um so, I know there's a topic for advice for new littles, but what about all the other problems us littles have? Like:

How do you identify a creep?

What do you do when you feel like your big/Dom has abandoned you?

How do you explain what's wrong to your doctor in big people terms?

How do you cope with stress?

When are good times to relax and be little?

 

You know, regular problems that maybe you'd prefer getting advice from other littles instead of from a big/Dom.

[Guest Rainbow]

Good point!

 

Let's see... creep identification.. I'd think red flags would be being pushy. Assuming you haven't discussed that that's what you'd like from them. Wanting lots of pictures from you. Asking for pictures right away.

 

For your second one, do you mean like exaggerated abandonment? Like they're on the phone when you need them or something? Or real abandonment like they're leaving you?

 

For the doctor, you have to put on the big girl pants. Use the big girl words. Sometimes you just can't be little. Also it might help to write it out at home what you want to say (questions too!) and bring it with you if you need to. That would totally be ok.

 

Stress- I haven't mastered this one yet. But I just try to get into my hobbies/activities. Also blasting some music while I have to do stress stuff like chores and things helps. I like to read or watch tv/movies or color. Sometimes even a nap is the answer. Or a snack. Listen to your body. And of course- little time.

 

Whenever your schedule allows for it really. And then whenever your mind needs/wants it. I have some step kids that are at the house every few weeks and while they're home, little time must wait until they're in bed. If they're not there and daddy is- whenever the mood strikes. And we don't have chores/errands to take care of. When it's just me.. I can pretty much be little whenever the mood strikes if I'm home.

[Guest QueenJellybean]

This is suchhhh a good topic!

 

How do you identify a creep? 
There are a fair number of warning signs when meeting a new Dominant. Are they lacking a profile picture, and refuse to provide one? Do they not have any friends that you can chat with, or ex-subs? Do they request pictures of you and get angry/plead with you when you refuse? Do they continually not respect your privacy and limits, saying you aren't a 'real sub'? Do they apologize often for their mistakes but continue to do the things you ask them not to? Do they blame the way they interact with you on their past experiences, trying to get sympathy? Do they expect you to call them 'Daddy' or 'Master' upon first meeting? Do they have rules for your interactions before they get to know you? Do they call you petnames without even knowing your actual name, or what you'd like to be called? Do they insist that sex is more important than getting to know someone, or that sex is all D/s is about? 

Careful; you may have met a creep! 

 

What do you do when you feel like your big/Dom has abandoned you?

Well, you can start with a good cry. Get out your emotions. You are allowed to be sad. You are so, so allowed to be sad. Your emotions are real, and totally justified. Start there.

Then, you rebuild what they broke. Start to reclaim yourself. Don't jump back into a relationship, but remember who you are. Remember why you are lovable and worthy of love. Get to know other submissives and littles like you. Reach out into the community for support and friendship rather than another relationship. Learn about yourself. 

And, of course, if you only feel like they've abandoned you and you don't know if they have, talk to them! Tell them how you are feeling. Communication is key. You might be surprised by what they day.

 

How do you explain what's wrong to your doctor in big people terms?
I have to echo what's already been said here. Write it down. It's so, so much easier if you write it down first. You can even bring it with you and just give it to the doctor. I've definitely done that before. It helps a lot.

How do you cope with stress?

Stress is the universal problem of people everywhere. How to deal with it can only be suggested, but the only truly effective ways will be unique to you. Journal. Make a worry book. Color. Buy a stressball. Listen to music. Go for a drive. Have sex. Play video games. Masturbate. Be Little for a while. Buy yourself something nice. Read a book. Ask to be read a book. Cook. Have dinner out. Do some yoga. Take out your frustration on a punching bag. Take a bubble bath. Lose yourself in a movie. Garden. Sew. The possibilities are endless. 

When are good times to relax and be little?
My favorite time to be Little is after work. It's 6 pm on a Wednesday, I've been changing diapers and teaching the alphabet for eight hours. I need a shower, and a good nights sleep. Nothing in the world feels better than coming home, opening the door, and dropping to my knees in front of Daddy. His fingers in my hair, flicking over the back of my collar. Changing into nothing but panties and a tank top and socks. Coloring with my Sister, or playing a video game. After I've had to be Big all day long, nothing feels better than coming home and being me. 

[Winnie]

Thank you everyone for your replies!

[Guest KaydeeA]

Coping with stress?!?!

 

This piece of advice I can give. Do something physical to relieve stress! I like to get about five hoppers of tennis balls and practice my serve...slice after slice. I like to run and smash each yellow ball as hard as I can. Sounds weird? Well, I find that the endorphins later help me relax and think more clearly. Anyone else play a sport for tension release? (Plus, tennis dresses are very cute!)