Figuring out who I am- Please help!

[LittlePrincess19]

My Daddy and I have been together for a while now. We have gone through trying to identify who we are in this together because we are both fairly new to the life but feel very naturally comfortable with the D/s dynamic.

 

We had a situation that halted our relationship being anything more than vanilla and it felt like we were both missing something. We realized our previous dynamic was not our true selves. We’ve realized we identify with the DD/lg roles but not completely- well, at least I’m not sure anyway. I do identify with being a Little but I don’t like the binky and stuffies and other age-play related things. Are they age-play? I used to sleep with my blanket and put it away when I met my Daddy. I didn’t think he’d accept it. I also used to sleep with a teddy but, again, wasn’t sure it would be accepted. I’ve hidden some parts of myself, simply because I was scared to show them at first. Now I’m just afraid I’ll get in trouble for not being myself (one of Daddy’s unspoken rules).

He loves the idea of having a Little but not in an age-play way, which makes me happy. But I don’t know if I’m really a Little or maybe a Middle. I don’t want to disappoint Daddy but I don’t want to pretend either.

 

I found a post on here about communication and tumblr, which is what made me want to join and post on here. I also created a tumblr (password protected) and shared it with Daddy and he was hesitant at first (he is not familiar with tumblr or many of the social media networks out there- he’s just never really been interested in any of them). He asked me if it was truly important to me and I told him it was so he entertained the idea and read my blog post and told me he was proud of me and understands. I knew when he read it because he sent me a sweet pic (something that has always been a part of our relationship). I could just tell that’s why he sent it.

 

So anyway, I think I might be able to share some of my wants and inner personal things that I’m afraid to share with him through our private tumblr but I want to make sure I know what I am before I start questioning it with Daddy. My biggest fear is disappointing Daddy and I don’t want to talk to him about it without really giving it a lot of thought as to where I identify- Little or Middle... or maybe something else? Is there another one? Again, we aren’t into age play so I’m kinda confused about where I identify.

 

Please help!!

*sorry for the rambling at times

Edited February 2, 2018 by LittlePrincess19

[Guest ~*~Sachita~*~]

First of all, line breaks, please. Thank you.

I am confused by this post. You had three question marks, but it feels like you are really asking for something we cannot give you - a label. Only you can make that decision. Here are some links to topics which might be helpful in making that decision.

"I do identify with being a Little but I don’t like the binky and stuffies and other age-play related things. Are they age-play?"

For some comprehensive information on age play, see these two wonderful posts by Prat: Age Play 101: 0-4 y.o. and Age Play 101: 4-10 y.o.

"I used to sleep with my blanket and put it away when I met my Daddy. I didn’t think he’d accept it. I also used to sleep with a teddy but, again, wasn’t sure it would be accepted."

It sounds like you are afraid of being judged by him.

"Now I’m just afraid I’ll get in trouble for not being myself (one of Daddy’s unspoken rules)."

I understand the concept of an unspoken rule and it seems like a terrible idea in this dynamic. I need things black and white when it comes to rules. Based on what you are expressing in this post, it does not sound like a good idea for you guys either. Check out this topic for more on rules: https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/12727-a-starting-point-for-rules-rewards-punishments/

"So anyway, I think I might be able to share some of my wants and inner personal things that I’m afraid to share with him through our private tumblr but I want to make sure I know what I am before I start questioning it with Daddy."

Again, we cannot give you that label. For validation, and to know that you are not the only one, check out these topics:

Am I a Little?
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/365-not-a-normal-little-help/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/524-im-super-tall-and-i-struggle-feeling-cute-and-small/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/4385-am-i-a-little/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/4583-i-think-i-might-be-a-little-and-i-would-love-some-help/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/5418-most-non-little-little-ever/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/5895-am-i-really-a-little/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/7826-am-i-little/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/8850-can-i-call-myself-a-little-even-though-im-a-virgin/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/9939-am-i-a-little/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/10706-is-it-unlittle-like-to-do-these-things/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/11515-not-so-little-little-space/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/14775-dont-act-like-a-little/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/14615-i-feel-weird/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/21425-am-i-a-little/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/25035-being-in-little-space/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/25214-am-i-allowed-to-be-a-little/

"My biggest fear is disappointing Daddy and I don’t want to talk to him about it without really giving it a lot of thought as to where I identify- Little or Middle... or maybe something else? Is there another one?"

How Did You Discover You Were a Little/CG?
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/8226-how-did-find-out-you-were-little/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/9226-coming-to-ddlg-stories/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/16472-how-did-you-discover-you-were-a-little/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/19153-how-did-you-become-a-littlecaregiver/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/19744-how-did-everyone-discover-the-ddlg-lifestyle-3/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/22544-a-bit-lost/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/2755-how-did-you-get-started/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/27996-whowhat-made-you-realize-you-were-little/

 

Do you have a little age?
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/89-whats-your-little-age/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/3966-changing-in-your-little-age/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/5610-how-do-you-know-what-age-you-are-as-a-little/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/6581-little-age/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/8483-very-curious-and-new/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/14395-do-you-have-to-have-a-little-age/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/17494-figuring-out-little-age/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/19641-little-age/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/22584-discovering-your-little-age-sos/
https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/26144-how-old-are-you-little-one/

 

Little vs. Middle

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/104-what-is-a-middle/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/27396-middles-howwhen-did-you-know-you-were-a-middle/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/29416-age-limit-is-9-12-still-considered-ddlg-or-something-else/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/26345-what-am-i-little-or-not/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/26520-middle-%E2%97%8B%E2%80%A2/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/25907-what-is-a-middle/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/27184-the-line-between-a-middle-and-an-adult/

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/24835-am-i-a-little-or-middle/

[LittlePrincess19]

I am confused by this post. You had three question marks, but it feels like you are really asking for something we cannot give you - a label. Only you can make that decision. Here are some links to topics which might be helpful in making that decision.

 

 

 

"I used to sleep with my blanket and put it away when I met my Daddy. I didn’t think he’d accept it. I also used to sleep with a teddy but, again, wasn’t sure it would be accepted."

 

It sounds like you are afraid of being judged by him.

 

"Now I’m just afraid I’ll get in trouble for not being myself (one of Daddy’s unspoken rules)."

 

I understand the concept of an unspoken rule and it seems like a terrible idea in this dynamic. I need things black and white when it comes to rules. Based on what you are expressing in this post, it does not sound like a good idea for you guys either.

 

I wanted to clarify a few things. I know you cannot provide me with a label, that’s not what I’m looking for. I’m looking for guidance and experiences of others. The fear of being judged was when we were a new relationship. I’m an adult who has child-like tendencies and didn’t know if that was something that would go over well. Now that we’ve been together for a while and let a majority of our guards down, it seems silly to still be worried about such a silly thing considering our openness.

 

The unspoken rule is simply because we haven’t outlined rules as of yet. We only recently began to discuss and accept our true selves because of the hiatus we took resulting from an issue we had.

 

I apologize for the confusion.

 

Thank you for sharing these links also!!

Edited February 2, 2018 by LittlePrincess19

[xBabydollx]

Hmm well a little is indeed a sub with child like qualities. As for a middle.....that kinda reflects a level of age regression or age play being correspondent to pre teen or teen years. However u say u don't ageplay so a little sounds about right. u also don't have to ageplay or age regress at all in order to be a little. u can be a little and not like stuffies, coloring, or any of that sort of stuff.

[LittlePrincess19]

After reading a lot of the article links and responses a few times (a thing I do), I think I am a Little with both middle and teenage tendencies. Which sounds like I’m a Little since it’s an umbrella term.

 

Now I just have to learn to accept the things about me that I feel inside and let them out. I think this is my biggest challenge simply because I’ve been expected to be a certain way for so long (society/social acceptance) because I’m an adult.

 

This forum has helped in such a short time! I’m so glad I found you all! Any tips and suggestions for personal acceptance despite social acceptances are greatly appreciated!