Getting started...

[QuietStorm]

Hi all

 

I’m new here so do forgive me if I’m posting in the wrong bit... I think this is right though.

 

So after much deliberation and lots of reading and research about the various types of DD/lg relationships and dynamics that seem to exist, I have decided I want to start a journey to find a little I can really bond with and be her caregiver.

 

I’m hesitant to refer to myself as a Daddy as it feels to me more like an earned title (although others may disagree)

 

So my question is... where to start? I am hardly a social butterfly but I have a lot of patience, time, energy and love for someone who could offer the same.

 

Things like the personals section is something I would like to give a try, and I’m sure I can find Littles all over the place.

 

I was also wondering if anyone had any advice on how much littlespace you want to engage in right away, how much you should deal with the “adult side” of the person and general etiquette for initially chatting with a view to a date (would this be a grown up date or some littlespace playtime?)

 

I realise a lot of this will depend on people’s opinions but I’m interested to hear a range of views on maybe how they got started. It seems like a lot of people here were in a pre existing relationship which has become DD/lg but I’m keen to see if anyone has any tips for starting from the very beginning and finding someone into the dynamic already?

 

Cheers!

[Rebel]

Well the two best ways to start would be posting in the Personal section, and just being active on the forum's chat. Everyone is different for everything, how they started, how they met, etc, but I'll tell you how my little and I started. And in my opinion, you are right to be hesitant to call yourself a daddy, because it is  an earned title. Its the self-proclaimed "daddies" that cause the issues (not saying you are one).

 

We started talking one day in the forum chat, and took it from there to Discord (and a little later, text message) so that we could just talk to each other (if you have been in chat, you'll understand xD). We must've talked on there and text message for about a month of everything beneath the sun. Originally, believe it or not, we had no intention or thought of getting together, we thought we'd just help each other find a partner and simply be friends. But over the month of talking, we connected, so I decided to ask if she wanted to be my little / girlfriend. 

 

During that entire month of talking, we talked about DDLG (for obvious reasons), but we never tried it with each other. I never really was in the CG mindset and she never really went full little during it. 

 

After I asked the question, that was when we moved into the DD/LG roles. After the first month, we decided to meet up in NYC (that was the worst train ride ever, but it was well worth it) and stayed up there for a weekend. During the day, we went on adventures and impromptu dates, and at night was DD/LG, where we just snuggled and talked non-stop. 

 

On the 13th will be 3 months "officially" together.

 

 

 

My best tips would be these:

- Be very patient trying to find someone, and do not force a relationship. The best person happens by when you least expect them.

- Try being active in the forum chat. Do not advertise yourself in there, let people get to know you.

- Do not misrepresent yourself or pretend to be "someone" else, because if you do, you might not find what you want. 

- Be honest, even if its not good (you can try to soften the blow, but don't pull back).

 

For a LDR, some other tips:

 

- LDRs only work if the relationship (in time, don't make plans from day one) plans to be together physically in the future (i.e. moving together)

- When seeing each other for the first time, meet somewhere very public, have an escape route/option in mind if things turn ugly, and always tell someone where you are going (friend, family, whatever. Give them the time and location so they know just in case) 

- Even after the first visit, do not give out personal information like your address or anything, you need to use your unbiased judgement.

- If something feels wrong or seems too good to be true, trust your gut. 

 

There are probably hundreds of other tips, but the biggest and the best tip for any relationship would be communication is key. 

[QuietStorm]

Thanks Rebel for such a comprehensive response. It was interesting to hear your experiences and the tips were really helpful.