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[Bunny Papa]

Deleted Edited January 28, 2018 by Bunny Papa

[Guest Stinkin'ol'Fred]

I'm interested in seeing the response too, I'm in the same boat I want my s.o.s to know ddlg without feelin like it's this big elaborate set of rules or anything.

[Little Illy]

The most vanilla way would to be to avoid labels until the end. Start with the description"
 

 

"I (the CG) enjoy being protective and a large part of helping my partner. I love doing the little things for him/her throughout the day. Everything from picking out her clothes, to cutting up her food to telling her it is time to go to bed. I do like control, but only when she has freely given me the rights. I like to make up fun rules that will make us both happy and get fun out of. These are typically structured to help one another be a better person, but it also does two things. It makes my partner feel cared for, loved and protected as well as makes me feel like I am taking care of her, providing for her and watching out for her well being. Since there are rules, I do like to enforce them to an agreed upon degree...." 

 

And continue on from there. Littles would have a similar description only "I need to feel protected and I crave structure. My partner can really help me out by doing, x, y, and z. And in return I give over control to him and follow his word as I trust he is caring for me."

 

Once the description is given and understand it is a dynamic, it has varying levels, it can be highly flexible AND fulfilling, then I would introduce labels as a whole. 

 

"Well, what I am talking about is a power exchange of sorts. People typically have titles associated with this, depending on what they prefer. It is called a Dominant and a submissive exchange. But I feel a deeper and more gentle and nurturing side naturally. I prefer to be called Daddy. I like Daddy because it highlights the amount of love, care and adoration I have for my partner. Other names are associated with Daddy as well, like Sir and Master. These are titles used to portray that I am simply the Dom and she has given me the right to be responsible for her and us. So in my kind of exchange, my partner would be called a little. This is because she is free to act little. She gets to put aside adult responsibilities and enjoy her time carefree. Some littles like 'baby girl, little one, princess, etc' because it makes them feel special."

 

And so on and so forth. I have found when describing DDlg to vanillas - you want to avoid all labels until the dynamic is fully understood. And even then you want to reference D/s because D/s is more accepted than DDlg and doesn't seem as mysterious. But if you explain the dynamic and the exchange first, and do so in a way that expresses its love and liberation, you will typically have a positive reaction. Once the person understands its between two consenting adults who just like this type of power exchange, then you bring in the titles. But going broad stroke with titles is also preferred as well. And explaining the why behind you liking your preferred title will help strip the vanilla of the stigma from it all. Always focus on the love and the fact that the sub/little is freely giving herself to him, etc.

 

Avoiding the stigma is going to be your biggest problem. So I definitely would make sure to avoid two things; 1.) do not let your partner research this on their own before talking to them. They may find some real, illegal, stuff that will forever have an averse affect. And 2.) when you do research, be with them and make sure you start out slowly. Don't just dump a little into a all diapers, pacis, bottles, oh my! Because that could be completely overwhelming. Same things with potential CGs, don't throw at them that they need to create rules, punishments, strict nature and an attentive eye 24/7. Start things slow with baby steps. Research small parts you think they show a natural interest in, even if they don't realize it. 'You like coloring, well... that happens to be a common thing with littles.'  'Did you know that most CGs actually like it when a little asks for their permission for some things?' and so on.

 

Over all, patience, baby steps and understanding is what is going to help. They will have questions that seem obvious to you, but don't treat them as such. They are valid for your partner. Communication is your biggest key. Use it well.

[Bunny Papa]

Deleted Edited January 28, 2018 by Bunny Papa