Is giving really better than receiving?

[Guest Littlenala]

So this is something that I hear every year around the holidays.  And while I absolutely love to give my friends and family gifts. I also want to receive gifts.  My adult side wants to help those in need. Love and cherish my friends and family. But my little side wants to be spoiled and receive gifts. Then I feel bad because tis the season to give and if religious, reflect on those things. I feel like I am being selfish for wanting to be given gifts. Does anyone else get this way around the holidays?   If so how do you combat those feelings?

[Guest SUeB]

No, because i don't care about what i can get from people. Sure, it's nice to receive gifts, I'm not stupid. But yes, i prefer to give to the people i care about. Anything i get is very much appreciated, but it isn't at all important to me.

[Guest Dulci]

I get what you mean; we've been socially conditioned to say and believe; "I prefer to give and receive". To some extent, I also believe in that, especially like you said, adult me. I spoil my friends and family around Christmas time because I love them so very much, I do not expect anything in return, ever. I also believe in giving to Charity and donate my free time to delivering food parcels to those in need (not just at Christmas - people need help all year).

 

However, little me, yearns for those Christmas long ago; when I'd wake up, stocking at the end of my bed; that magic that Santa Claus has been. Running downstairs to find that "Santa" has taken a big old bite of mince pie and drunk his glass of milk; not forgetting his reindeer munching on the carrots I left the night before. I think that is what it boils down to; that magic of Christmas, those fond memories. Those big piles of presents just magically appearing; not knowing what has gone into them. 

 

I don't think it's selfish to openly say that you want to receive parents; social conditioning just has a lot to answer for!  At the end of the day both giving and receiving has it's merits; you can't have one without the other persay. 

 

I hope I've given a little perspective on my thoughts on this; I do not want to sound like a brat at all! (which is another argument in itself). 

[Guest Urthurs]

I don't enjoy getting gifts from people I like. It just makes me really uncomfortable for some reason.

[Guest Littlenala]

Princess you describe exactly what I was feeling. Thank you for that.

[Guest pacibrat]

Yes! Little me wants all the things! 

[MrJohnny]

For myself, the important part of giving and receiving gifts is the communication of affection. When I give someone a gift it is because I like/love them, I am glad they are in my life, they are important to me, their happiness helps my happiness, and I have been thinking of them. When I receive a gift I feel like these things (to some degree) are being communicated to me. We all want to feel significant, and gifting is a pleasing way to feel that (both ways). And I think that we are most fulfilled when some sort of balance is achieved between giving and receiving.

[LittleKitten13]

I honestly like both giving and receiving.  I often feel like I don't give enough, because I love the people I love so much that I just want to give them the world, and I feel like nothing can amount to what they deserve.

When it comes to receiving, I love to get gifts that show someone knows me and cares about me, and wants me to be happy.  Like, papa got me two movies he knows I love, and a Pokémon, and cute necklace with a cheesy pickup line to go along with it.

[Guest Ryan_eh]

For me the Christmas season doesn't revolve around the gifts at all, it's spending time with my friends, family, and loved ones that are important. The gift giving is a peripheral thing. Yes it's nice to receive presents, especially when it's a personal and thoughtful one that shows they really care about you, but what makes me happy is seeing that everyone is happy spending time together and the look on their faces when they open a personal gift. It gives the warm fuzzies inside!

[Insanity_Stars_Birdie]

In general I prefer to give even if I do enjoy receiving gifts as well. It's different for everyone but I just prefer seeing people happy and knowing that I'm the cause of that joy. It makes me indescribably happy to do so. That and I've always been a little weird about people buying me things, not really sure why? I think it stems from growing up really poor.

[Elbs]

I'd much rather get gifts than give them, no question. I suspect most people are like this, even if they don't admit it.

 

I give gifts at Christmas because I want the person getting them to be happy, not because it makes me happy to give them. (Although I do find it really fun seeing my Mom wear the hat I crocheted.)

 

Liking to get gifts is nothing to be ashamed of, in my opinion. Especially if you're a little - I'm not a little and even I like recapturing the feeling of being a kid at Christmas when I'm opening presents.