Trouble staying in Little space

[NyxieKitten]

So, I get really into little space, but my boyfriend, who is not quite familiar with the lifestyle is only able to keep up the daddy character for about thirty minutes tops. When he stops I drop super fast and hard. It makes me a bit depressed and sometimes even anxious. He isn't doing it on purpose but it is just sort of frustrating. Anyone have any tips on how to deal with this?

[Guest Angelsdolly]

I suppose if he isn't used to it, then there is really

​nothing you can do. But you can definitely get into little

space without him. Just relax, and embrace what you love.

Then it should click-naturally. Sometimes being around someone

who isn't into the life-style can be really nerve wrecking.

We are afraid to be judged for it, but if he really loves you,

then he should accept you no problem. It sounds like he is 

trying if he can do it for at least 30 mins, so he is willing.

Maybe he will come around, just push a little bit.

[cuppycakes]

It seems to me like the problem is that he is treating it like a roleplaying game and you want it as more of a lifestyle. I think you should discuss your concerns with him about this.

 

I would argue that he shouldn't have to put up a daddy "character", as when someone's a daddy..... they're just a daddy... I dunno, it's not like my daddy puts up a "character", he just always is himself. Sometimes he's very dominant (but usually that's just for play time), but I don't expect him to act like that all the time, and when he does it's not an act, it's just how he's feeling at the time. I don't think you should have him do something he's not comfortable with :c that sounds strenuous on your relationship, and might make him feel as though him being his real self isn't good enough.

 

Maybe try to introduce him to the lifestyle and read up on it more yourself before having him take on a "character". He doesn't need to know everything about being a daddy before he can start acting like one, but he also doesn't need to conform to what you think he should be. If he's your daddy, it's as he is, not as someone who you want him to act like.

 

Not trying to sound harsh or rude, just my opinion. 

[NyxieKitten]

It seems to me like the problem is that he is treating it like a roleplaying game and you want it as more of a lifestyle. I think you should discuss your concerns with him about this.

 

I would argue that he shouldn't have to put up a daddy "character", as when someone's a daddy..... they're just a daddy... I dunno, it's not like my daddy puts up a "character", he just always is himself. Sometimes he's very dominant (but usually that's just for play time), but I don't expect him to act like that all the time, and when he does it's not an act, it's just how he's feeling at the time. I don't think you should have him do something he's not comfortable with :c that sounds strenuous on your relationship, and might make him feel as though him being his real self isn't good enough.

 

Maybe try to introduce him to the lifestyle and read up on it more yourself before having him take on a "character". He doesn't need to know everything about being a daddy before he can start acting like one, but he also doesn't need to conform to what you think he should be. If he's your daddy, it's as he is, not as someone who you want him to act like.

 

Not trying to sound harsh or rude, just my opinion. 

I think the biggest thing is I am fine with not living it 24/7 and him only being a daddy when I am in little space. And he is quite dominant and into the role. I love him with Everything I have so I am willing to compromise I just wish I could get like...a full day rather then 30 minutes.

[cuppycakes]

I think the biggest thing is I am fine with not living it 24/7 and him only being a daddy when I am in little space. And he is quite dominant and into the role. I love him with Everything I have so I am willing to compromise I just wish I could get like...a full day rather then 30 minutes.

 

Okay I see where you're coming from, but I still don't know if he really needs to play a character. I feel like playing a character is something you do for a short role play scene, not for an entire day. That would be exhausting. Really, I think you should talk to him about your concern, but I don't think you should push him if he doesn't want to and/or can't do it. Again, it's not really a "role" anymore when it's for an extended period of time. It's more of a personality.

 

It just kind of sounds like you're trying to tell him "this is what a daddy is" when there are sooooo many different kinds of daddies out there. Some daddies are very "stereotypical" in a sense, some are submissive, some will play with toys with their little, some would rather put a collar on them and require them to sit at their feet at all times. I could go on and on, but you get the idea.

 

Don't try to push him into a box of what he should be, just let him be himself and interact with you the way he normally would and let yourself go around him.

[NyxieKitten]

Okay I see where you're coming from, but I still don't know if he really needs to play a character. I feel like playing a character is something you do for a short role play scene, not for an entire day. That would be exhausting. Really, I think you should talk to him about your concern, but I don't think you should push him if he doesn't want to and/or can't do it. Again, it's not really a "role" anymore when it's for an extended period of time. It's more of a personality.

 

It just kind of sounds like you're trying to tell him "this is what a daddy is" when there are sooooo many different kinds of daddies out there. Some daddies are very "stereotypical" in a sense, some are submissive, some will play with toys with their little, some would rather put a collar on them and require them to sit at their feet at all times. I could go on and on, but you get the idea.

 

Don't try to push him into a box of what he should be, just let him be himself and interact with you the way he normally would and let yourself go around him.

eeeeh I think character was the wrong word.

[maxben10]

well, is he aware about you wanting more then the 30 min ?