Guest Little_Big_Special Posted October 23, 2017 Report Posted October 23, 2017 I am not quite sure what to do. I am in a relationship with my daddy, but while the Little/CG aspect has died away from the relationship; so has the stability of the relationship. I have tried in many ways to fix things, but he sees absolutely nothing wrong and I don't know where to turn anymore. I don't want to leave the relationship, I love him with every bit of me, but I am so tired of everything I try going down the drain. I understand he has a past of failed relationships, but I am not even my honest self anymore. Have you, there are very good times, but the bad times never fully stop and lay dormant but present. At this point I have written a letter explaining what all is wrong, which he has had for three days but has not read because he rather me tell him, but I can't. I want to be assertive but that is met with arguing so my hands are tied. I want the relationship to work and I have talked to my councilor, my friends, and him and nothing has changed. I have tried every mature way to handle this to my capability, but I don't know what to do anymore. It has honestly gotten worse since I said anything and he responded that nothing is wrong and that others shouldn't know anything. But I have no where else to turn with this at this point. I love him so much, but is this all worth it......If anyone has ANYTHING that could be done, at this point I will try anything, it would be so very appreciated. Even just someone to talk to with an open ear would be a great happening.
osito Posted October 23, 2017 Report Posted October 23, 2017 Man. this seems like a tough situation. There are some questions I have... is it ok to friend you and message you?
peter6111 Posted October 23, 2017 Report Posted October 23, 2017 I'm really sorry for you, because that is a really bad situation in my eyes... Communication is the key to any relationship, and when you're in a relationship, you have to be able to take it seriously if your partner (in this case you) want to change things. To stubbornly claim that nothing's wrong will only tear you further apart. Whatever you wanted to fix in the relationship, I would personally focus on just fixing the communication between you two. He cannot demand you communicating in a certain way (Talking directly versus writing a letter) if that makes you too uncomfortable to actually get point through to him... Really sorry I can't help more than to say that you should get some communication up and running :/ Good luck regardless! 1
Guest Little_Big_Special Posted October 23, 2017 Report Posted October 23, 2017 Man. this seems like a tough situation. There are some questions I have... is it ok to friend you and message you? That is fine by me.
Guest Little_Big_Special Posted October 23, 2017 Report Posted October 23, 2017 I'm really sorry for you, because that is a really bad situation in my eyes... Communication is the key to any relationship, and when you're in a relationship, you have to be able to take it seriously if your partner (in this case you) want to change things. To stubbornly claim that nothing's wrong will only tear you further apart. Whatever you wanted to fix in the relationship, I would personally focus on just fixing the communication between you two. He cannot demand you communicating in a certain way (Talking directly versus writing a letter) if that makes you too uncomfortable to actually get point through to him... Really sorry I can't help more than to say that you should get some communication up and running :/ Good luck regardless! No need to apologize, I am thankful for any help that is given. I am going to try to get the communication running again, because I really don't want to walk away from the relationship. But thank you still. 1
Guest DaddyCares1 Posted October 24, 2017 Report Posted October 24, 2017 I really do hope you two can work things out. In saying that I feel like if one person is having to do all the work to save that relationship, it probably isn't meant to be. It certainly isn't healthy. I've been in that position where you love someone and try everything you can to make it work. 1
Guest SUeB Posted October 24, 2017 Report Posted October 24, 2017 i think you do know what to do, you just don't want to do it. And i am sorry, but his history of failed relationships is no excuse for anything. i have a terrible history of those, some real trauma, but i treat my partner like a king. 1
Steve.dd4lg Posted October 24, 2017 Report Posted October 24, 2017 Maybe u should end it. It seems that he doesn't value your true self. Ending it might make him realise how important u are to him. Sometimes in a relationship we take what we have for granted n it takes a kick up the backside to make us see what's important. That may be what he needs
Poppa Bear Posted October 24, 2017 Report Posted October 24, 2017 If he will not even read a letter you wrote him he does not want to do anything to save this relationship. Maybe his passed failures are because he just did not care to try and hold on. In a relationship each side must work to keep it alive or it will fail. If you need someone like an Uncle you can talk to friend me and send a chat or kik me at kothgar69 just let me know where you know me from if you kik me. Hope you can work things out.
Guest Derptronic Posted October 24, 2017 Report Posted October 24, 2017 I would like to suggest that you consider that he may have something going on. Things don't go from great to one partner miserable and another oblivious without there being an additional issue. Here are some ideas: 1. He could dealing with some identity issues (age, dissatisfaction at work, or with personal accomplisments). He's looking inward and not seeing you. 2. His brain chemistry is altered such as in Bipolar disorder, either due to a cycle of the illness or (on a related note) due to the side effects of anti-depression or anti-psychotics, both of which can alter a person's zest for life and their relationships without them being aware of it. 3. He's having fun with someone else, either emotionally or physically and is experiencing New Relation Energy (NRE). This can take away from your enjoyment of your relationship because he's so focused on the good feelings coming from some other vector. Wait a while and that should pass. 4. He's just not that into the lifestyle right now and wants something less scene and more vanilla. If your needs are strongly DD/lg then this could feel like abandonment to you. I supect this is really whatbis happening, because it seems to happen a lot in DD/lg. My theory on this is that for the little the dynamic is more often something they do not feel complete without. It's a strong need. For the caregiver role, the dynamic seems less critical comparatively. I mean they seem to get by without it better than the littles do. Last thing: if he's not willing to read your letter it could be out of fear that you are breaking up with him. I'd sure look at a random letter from my little with a bit of apprehension if she'd been expressing concerns. But then we never communicate via letters.
SkunkPrincess Posted October 24, 2017 Report Posted October 24, 2017 Anything that causes this, will never be an excuse to not read your letter. He seems not to care at all. It's hard and painful, but you should let go of the good memories. They will always stay and try to push the bad moments away. It's important to start thinking about the bad memories and think: Is it still worth it? 'Someone who does not look after you, simply doesn't care'
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