Nowhere Else To Share About This

[Guest DaddysNaughtyGirl]

Nothing like opening up to someone and letting yourself get attached, only to be abandoned for not being able to do something you stated from the beginning you couldn't do.

 

Why do people pursue something if it's not what they want/need? I just don't understand it. I think I'm ready to step away from this after being hurt again.

[reindeer412]

Girll I totally understand this. It's shi**y and it sucks. It's a reflection of that person and their dishonest character - not of you. Keep your chin up

[baldguy1]

​This person's unwillingness to follow through usually means they were doing this "on the sly," i.e., lying about who they were ... age, marital status, etc.  It says nothing about you, dear.  The good news is: You just dodged a bullet!  I know it probably doesn't seem like that right now, but ... you're lucky to have discovered this person's faults so early.  Hang in there ... don't give up.

[Guest DaddysNaughtyGirl]

Thanks @reindeer412

 

@baldguy1- he wasn't dishonest about who he was. I just wasn't what he needed I guess. Thanks for the kind words though.

Edited September 28, 2017 by DaddysNaughtyGirl

[DavCentral]

I'm going to put it out there that maybe, they thought the thing you can't do, you could possibly learn to... and it didn't happen.

 

you're most likely right saying you weren't what he needed.

 

 

edit: or he thought he could do without, and found out that's not the case.

 

only he will be able to tell you the truth, to be honest.

Edited September 28, 2017 by DavCentral

[Guest DaddysNaughtyGirl]

It wasn't about learning to do something. It was something that just wasn't possible for me and I made it clear from the beginning.

[Guest DaddysNaughtyGirl]

I'm thinking it's more along the lines of he figured I could be pushed or manipulated into it, or maybe figured it'd change eventually. Idk. Being abandoned over something I was clear and upfront about from the beginning isn't fair though. Especially if it's something he knew he needed.

[Untwisted]

You both knew from the start that there was something he wanted that you couldn't do, and you both tried to make it work despite knowing that there was a potential incompatibility. 

 

There's nothing wrong with trying.  Whether he thought he could change your mind or he thought he could learn to do without and genuinely tried to compromise, I don't know. 

 

Either way, you tried, both knowing there was a risk of incompatibility, and it didn't work out.

 

I know you'll feel crushed right now but don't be disheartened, you'll pick yourself back up.

[Guest DaddysNaughtyGirl]

The point being missed here is this... it wasn't stated as a need/requirement on his part in the beginning. Not until well into things. And I had said from the beginning it wasn't something I could do. Then to just quit talking to me over it?

 

I'm not seeking advice about this, just venting more than anything I suppose.

Edited September 28, 2017 by DaddysNaughtyGirl

[Untwisted]

Fair enough, I'd got the impression it had been a two-sided discussion from the start. 

 

Have a good vent!

[Guest SUeB]

Well, he just wasn't the one for you. Yes it hurts when people act like jerks, but best to find out sooner rather than later. Just keep your chin up, your head held high for sticking to your principles, and move on. Edited September 28, 2017 by SUeB

[Guest DeOriginalMittens]

I get this, it happens to me a lot. Some people like others to be attached to them or some find it a goal and once they accomplished it they move on to another person. Honestly, I've just wanted to find someone right for me and settle down but that's been a fleeting dream and a wild goose chase since I ever had the thought of wanting a wife.

[mabel]

I totally get the frustration and the pain, and I understand you are not here for advice just for venting, but let me tell you something nevertheless. You can only "let this whole thing go" if you let go of part of yourself. But I know for a fact, that "the little" doesn't go away, she gets imprisioned inside and neglected and that is not good, believe me. Whatever you believed this guy to be, he simply wasn't. But that shouldn't make you dismiss yourself. You can't render yourself things you are not, and that's okay. Just be true to yourself and let him, -who you truly belong together with- find you. If you hide, how will he recognize you? Take care of yourself and heal. I think this place can help. I wish you all the best!