Advice for a secret little?

[Guest secretlylittle]

Hi, I am seeking some advice regarding introducing the ddlg dynamic into my relationship. I have been married for 5 years and my husband is significantly older than me. I have always displayed characteristics indicative of this type of relationship, and my husband knows about my interest in bdsm, but has never acted upon it. I have brought the bdsm part up a couple of times but it usually ends in an argument. I fear he won't understand. Any advice would be appreciated!

[Guest DaddyBuddha]

Hi, honestly not everyone is into bdsm, if talking about it causes arguments you can always try talking to him to try out different things.. They might not like what they hear about it but I'm sure he'll love what he'll see, put on some costumes n see how reaction. If that doesn't work suggest that you get a care giver or a daddy with his permission.. Thats all i can think of tbh.

[Guest secretlylittle]

Thank you, I appreciate it! I will try it.

[Guest SUeB]

I genuinely don't understand the "advice" so many give to bring someone else into the relationship. You have a relationship issue? Have sex with someone else! Is your partner not fulfilling everything you want? Ask him/her if you can find someone else!

If my partner asked to deal with anything like that, he would very quickly be out the door.

Is there any suggestion that the op is poly?

Sorty but without that, that is a dreadful suggestion.

 

And to answer the question, it's just something you need to talk to him about calmly. No pressure or guilt trips, and not when emotions are running high. If he genuinely has no interest, then that's his right and his choice. You need to decide if you can live without it, or if its really vital to you, then maybe time to address the issue of your incompatibility.

There is nothng ng wrong with having an unfulfilled fantasy. I have things i would love, but i know I can't with my Daddy. So I have let them go. My relationship and the vast abundance of amazing things we have together is worth a trillion times more than an infinate number of fantasies. It's called compromise. It's up to you if you can let this one go.

[Guest secretlylittle]

Thank you! I appreciate the reply!

[sunshinethepet]

Coming out of an 11 year relationship (4 yrs married) I can say it gets old. I mean that's how it was for me at least. I expressed my wants and bdsm desires and he just was never interested in it. He made fun of my interests in being a little so I suppressed it all these years. Occasionally giving into small toys and random cute things.

 

Sex became sooo routine and boring that we eventually just stopped and now it's been a year and a half and we just hit our 30's. That on top of many other things finally gave me the push I needed to tell him I wanted to separate.