Love ddlg, but no time for ddlg

[Guest Aquarius]

Hey guys,

Just wondering if anyone else struggles with this.

I've known about dd/lg for a couple of years now and it is so alluring for me. I really want to find a little/kitten… I think it would be amazing to finally explore this world with someone who wants the same thing… but I have ZERO spare time. I spend 100% of my time working on different business projects, and when I'm not doing that I'm daytrading cryptocurrencies (like Bitcoin)… so I'm a workaholic lol.

It's frustrating because I crave a ddlg connection with a little/kitten… but I can't do anything about it because I think what I'm working on right now is really important… I'm building a successful future / making my dreams come true.

Anyone else love ddlg but just don't seem to have the time to find anyone to explore it with, or am I on my own?

Edited August 28, 2017 by Aquarius

[Guest Blushangel]

   I struggle with the same thing, because I'm in a similar place right now. Everyone always says to live like today might be your last day, but the reality is that for most of us it isn't our last day. Building a successful future and working hard to achieve your goals and dreams is very important. The reality is if you don't have time to look for a relationship, you probably don't have that much time to be in a relationship. 

    Personally, I'm taking time to focus on myself and building my future right now, and putting off searching for anything till I'm in the right place for it. I feel that to try to make something when I don't have the time to focus on it is automatically setting it up for failure. So maybe you are in a similar situation and just wait it out till you are in a good place to start pursuing a relationship.

   If its truly something you yearn for, then maybe you need to change your priorities and life around, in order to find your happiness. I forget who the quotes by but it goes something like this " If something is truly important to you won't have time for it; you'll make time for it". Thats a rough paraphrase, but you get the point.

  Here's some more cliche things I say to myself when I feel lonely and like I want to pursue a relationship:

"if its meant to be, its meant to be."

"good things come to those who wait"

Any who, I hope this sharing of my insight was helpful.

[Guest Aquarius]

Yeah that's a really good point actually. As much as I want a little, if I have zero time to even look for her then it would unfair to her if I had her now as I wouldn't be able to spend any time with her at all.

I need to get all of these projects to a point where I have a lot more free time, and then I can dedicate time to relationships. Good things come to those who wait!

[Guest CuddlyPenguin]

You have your whole life to be with someone, but only right now to work on and build a lot for yourself individually. Work on building your empire or heaven as you put it in your profile and when you’re ready to share all that with someone you’ll find them. Because most likely the type of person you are loooking for is doing the same exact thing you are right now. Good luck and I totally understand what you meant because I struggle with the same thing but as a little. I often think how can I submit myself fully to someone when I’m still on a journey with myself and working on building things independently for myself? What I stated above is the conclusion i came too. It gave me somewhat of closure so I hope it does the same for you (:

I wish you luck on all your success!

[Guest McLeodLot65]

I'm in the same place. I come here be able to talk to people who understand what that's like. Sometimes that makes it better, but sometimes it makes it worse. So far it's a net positive.

[Guest McLeodLot65]

And even if I can't have a little, I can still talk to littles for a brief interval here and there, and that's usually the best part of my day.

[Guest SUeB]

This has nothing to do with ddlg. You don't have time for a relationship full stop, by the sounds of it. So if you can't make time to develop one, i would say wait til you can. It's unfair to start something with a potential partner, then find you can't give her any of your time or attention.

But on the other hand, it's the same principle as people saying they don't have time to exercise. If it's important to you, you don't simply HAVE time, you MAKE time.

[Guest Andyy95]

This has nothing to do with ddlg. You don't have time for a relationship full stop, by the sounds of it. So if you can't make time to develop one, i would say wait til you can. It's unfair to start something with a potential partner, then find you can't give her any of your time or attention.

But on the other hand, it's the same principle as people saying they don't have time to exercise. If it's important to you, you don't simply HAVE time, you MAKE time.Once agai

 

Once again SUeB is right on the money. I used to think that cause of my hectic scheduel (work 6 days a week, university, language courses and so on), it's unfair of me to have a sub cause I simply wouldn't have the time to give her the attention she deserves. But C'mon, those are just excusses. U can ALWAYS make time for your partner, you simply choose not to cause of one reason or the other and then use ur lack of time as an excusse. The way I see it you are in the same sittuation as me, so let me tell you what works for me: I need someone as independent as I am, someone that isnt the obsessive type (like sends you a text every 2 minutes and cries how she misses you), someone that is wholeheartedly in the bdsm lifestyle and understands it. I want the person to have a life of her own , be it work, university or anything along those lines. In short I need a mature person that can relate to my hectic sittuation, but is willing to create time for US whenever she can. I'm not saying I don't want the person to be clingy, I'm just saying that I don't want someone that has nothing better to do then text me all day. I need someone with that has a life of her own, that she puts a lot of effort and energy into it, ambitions of her own and so on. I admire that about people and am like that as well, so ofcourse I'd like my significant other to relate to me in that aspect.

Edited November 24, 2017 by Andyy95

[Guest McLeodLot65]

The original question still stands, though - granting the assumption that someone can't be a daddy right now, but really wants to be in that role...how does that person deal with their feelings of sadnes/frustration/whatever? Ie me. I can't be a daddy for other reasons, but I want to. How do I deal with those feelings?

[Guest infinitecases]

Whilst you feel you have no time right now, if you happened to chance upon the little/kitten you've been looking for all along out of the blue, you would make time. It's probably not smart to go out looking for one right now, but things happen when you least expect them to, and if you really want something, there's always a way to make time for it. Your time might be split more between love and work, but the time you make for the former is a trade for a kind of happiness your work may never give you, so you can't really regret that!

[Alice18]

It’s a matter of priority. I can understand because I’m a bit of a workaholic too. An introvert, to boot!

The hard part is managing your priorities. My motto in life is “if there’s a will, there’s a way!” If you want to be in a relationship, whether it’s ddlg or not, you have to invest some part of yourself in it too.