Daddy said....how will you make it up to me and what is your punishment to be?

[Guest Princessaj]

Hi everyone, uniques situation for me....

-Know a lot about DDlg from reading, chatting w littles, DD....
-Never had a commited/experienced DD, it was all sexy time for them
-Now have a brand new commited/experienced DD that I am also learning about as a person.

This morning I was disrespectful and not obedient when he was sharing an idea for a new biz.
I should have just listened and speak when invited. I gave my opinion, was cavalier and am now horrified by my remarks.

I have appologized and said I would listen until I am invited to contribute next time.

BUT, he is insisting that I tell him how I am going to make it up to him and that I am to come up w/my punishment.

I am stuck, dont want to disapoint him...frozen.. that I will do something wrong.

I told him, I have never had rules, punishments, and I don't lnow him.

He left it with me to figure it out!!!'???? What do I do?

Its not that complicated as I know what I have read of others rules and punishments, but now that its my turn...

We have talked, communicated...telling me to do that wont help unless you suggest specific things to say and what to ask.

Otherwise, Daddies what have you had your little do in this kind of disobedience to make it up to you and what kind of punishment did you give?

Littles, have you done something like this, how did you make it up and if you had to come up with your own punishment, what was it?

You are all the best in the whole wide world and I know you will be very helpful. Hugs❣️

Edited August 17, 2017 by Princessaj

[Sleepless]

Personally, I don't believe he should punish you for something when there isn't a specific set of rules and punishments that go along with those rules. It's not fair for him to be able to decide willy-nilly that something is against the rules without discusssing it with you before hand.

 

Maybe ask him to give you a warning this time, and explain to him how this situation has caused you to be concerned with the lack of structure in your relationship with him. Tell him you'd like to have an adult conversation, outside of sub/dom space, so that together you can create guidelines that you both agree to and are comfortable with.

[Ikneelonly4Daddy]

I agree with @MachoPrincess I think there should there be discussion, rules decided on and boundaries set.

 

My own rule is that I don't come up with punishments. That's Dadddy's job. My job is to obey and be a good girl.

[Guest sophia isabel]

You didn't break any rules if no rules exist. You should tell him that punishments will be decided once rules are. And my ex-daddy and I had a rule in place that if he hasn't mentioned it as a rule and I do, I would get a warning and it would be put in the rules.

[plumflower]

>.> i disagree with the others here. Just so you all know it's not because i want to be disrespectful, it's just that your Daddy and mine are very alike. I have faced this situation before. I do have to say he needs to tell you if he doesn't like to be interrupted when he's talking.  My Daddy doesn't like being interrupted at all.

 

I'd pick a punishment and since you already apologize pick a less severe punishment like five spankings.

 

if he's letting you pick, be gentle or not gentle to yourself. When my daddy lets me pick, I go for the middle. You gotta take your punishments serious too but you don't have to mark your own body up like he might.

[Guest ~*~Sachita~*~]

From your description, it sounds like more of a respect issue than a rule/punishment issue.  (If that is incorrect, disregard the below suggestions.)

 

One of my exes was a stickler for respect in a way I had never experienced before.  It took me a while to figure out how to phrase my sentences, when to speak up, and what he most wanted to hear.

 

In this situation, the first step is to apologize (which it sounds like you already did), use the word "disrespectful", and identify what you did that was incorrect.  Something along the lines of, "I am sorry for the way I spoke to you this morning; it was disrespectful of me to say ________."

 

The next step is to promise to not behave that way again, "I understand that it is not acceptable for me to communicate by __________, and I promise to not do it again."

 

At this point I would ask for a bit of feedback, because what you think you did wrong is not necessarily what he thinks you did wrong.  So I would say something like, "Is there anything else about our conversation this morning that felt disrespectful to you?"  If he says yes, then you can add to your apology and promise.  If he says no, he is agreeing that there is nothing else about the interaction he is upset about.

 

The final step is the punishment part.  If it is the first time this has happened, I feel like the apology and promise should be all that is needed, maybe with an agreement for what will happen if you break that promise.  However, if you are certain that you deserve a punishment, try something that makes him feel super respected:

 

- Spend an evening sitting at his feet

- Back rub/massage

- Help him with a special project

- Clean his car

- Spend an agreed amount of time silent

- Sloppy blow job (this one always works best)

 

Let us know how you end up handling this!

[Guest Princessaj]

Update! You are all the best in the whole wide world and I really like all the details and real life references that make me feel very loved and appreciated. Thank you!

 

After I posted, I kept on struggling, begging, pleading via text (not my first choice, I am a talker)...all of which he is really into-the struggling, begging and pleading parts...for him to help me with this task.

 

Then I said, "please give me 3 choices or how to make it up and 3 choices of punishments...."

 

Lo and behold.."sarcastic" who would have thunk...were all sexual. So that is him in a nutshell. No judgement, the truth, His truth. BTW-we have not been intimate yet.

 

We did talk tonight about how it went...I listened.

 

One thing that I think came to light was that he likes how I Adult in biz...and wants that same "Adulting" sexually (which completely goes against me being a submissive). My response was..."Then what do I do with my little?" I think he is still figuring that out. Bunches of mixed signals and directives....but we are both present and engaged in the process.

 

I am going to request rules and punishments up front and I don't want to be in charge of that.

 

This experience really threw me for a loop and definitely made me struggle with being a little, learning to submit, feeling like an airhead...all the while getting to know him. Such a full body, mind, spirit exercise! Pretty exhausting, but a great experience of discovery. 

 

As I have said before...even though I thought I was really well versed, studied in DDlg and ready for a Daddy, when you get a committed/experienced Daddy or a little, for that matter even a non-comitted/inexperienced Daddy or little...IT'S ON. Be careful what you wish for. Hugs.

Edited August 17, 2017 by Princessaj

[Ikneelonly4Daddy]

[Guest Princessaj]

UPDATE! UPDATE! UPDATE! UPDATE! UPDATE!

 

Today Daddy and I were talking on the phone on my lunch break and everything was all so nice.

 

We were talking about where our names came from and I asked him for his middle name.

 

We finished chatting and I went back to my desk and googled him.

 

OMG!!!!! Years of Lawsuits!!!  Scams!!!!! Fraud!!!! Battery!!!! Deadbeat Dad!!!!  

 

There is a police report saying he is dead.

 

So many poor people that he promised business services and just took their money!!! I know that it is him because they describe him physically, what car he drives, where his sister works, his children and so many more details that it is him.

 

Blocked my phone, text, dating site profile where he first messaged me.....DONE AND DUSTED!!!

 

Be very careful out there, has happened to me before and did background checks to find things that will make your toes curl.

 

I hate Adulting, I just want to be little. Hugs

[Guest ~*~Sachita~*~]

Holy shit.

[Ikneelonly4Daddy]

What. The actual. F**k.

[SkunkPrincess]

Holy shit, this is giving me chills up my spine.

[plumflower]

Omg!!  But things like this happen and it sounds like this guy isn't for real with you. I'm sorry honey.  I once had a guy try to pit my and my then bff against each other and he wanted me to call him master.  Yea, no.  You're better off not with him.