Daddy With Self Esteem Issues? Help

[DMDaddy]

Hey guys, so I'm realizing I have a major problem with my self esteem. You see, my Little and I have been in a committed relationship for about 27 months as of right now. Generally, we're very happy and especially so since we discovered the DD/LG type dynamic. The biggest block to our relationship, however, is that I've had really bad self esteem and trust issues for a very long time, depression and middle school and blah blah angst, and through a couple exs cheating on me and many many years until I actually found some solid, steady friends, I've gained a strong sense of mistrust. This is a huge hurdle for my Little and I, because I find myself some days crying and feeling like she shouldn't be with me, how she's so much better than me and all that jazz, even though I'm reminded daily of my daddy status and how much she needs me and feels that I am an amazing partner. I need some serious help here guys, I don't want to keep scaring and hurting her.

[cuppycakes]

Have you seriously considered therapy or medication? Medication was one of the best things that ever happened to me, and I know some of my close friends had a similar experience with therapy. Talk to a doctor, please.

 

Also you should talk to your SO. Put aside the ddlg dynamic and talk to her as your equal. Tell her how you've been feeling, and that it's not her fault you're feeling like this. It's nobody's fault, not yours either. You can't help feeling this way, and she should be able to understand that.

 

 

Lastly, take care of yourself. Make sure you're following the basic guides of self care. Super important. (SFW link)

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/11765-self-care-master-post/

[DMDaddy]

Thank you, and yeah I'm on some meds but not sure if they're working 100% like I'd want. I think my Little and I are in for another really deep talk, it always soothes me and her. I appreciate your response, sorry if this is inappropriate for this forum :/

[cuppycakes]

Thank you, and yeah I'm on some meds but not sure if they're working 100% like I'd want. I think my Little and I are in for another really deep talk, it always soothes me and her. I appreciate your response, sorry if this is inappropriate for this forum :/

Nonono you're fine! I just wanted to make sure you're getting the proper help you need. We care about each other here

 

I'm glad to hear that you guys have had these talks before. Communication is vitally important, but often overlooked. It's great to hear that you're actively talking about it.

 

As far as meds go, depending on how long you've been on them and what strength they're at, you might want to talk to your doctor about switching medications/getting a higher dosage. I know one of my friends had to go through 3-4 different kinds before she got the right one, and I had to up the dosage to twice what it first was on mine. Don't be scared to go back to your doctor if something isn't working! (I mean at least wait a couple of weeks, but other than that...) They get that stuff all the time, they know how to deal with it. Another good thing is that if your doctor is mean or refuses to work with you, get a new doctor.

[DMDaddy]

Thank you so much I really love this community so far it's so helpful!

[jaredstone363]

First, you should be proud of yourself and feel good just for the fact that you're talking about the problem. Good for you! A lot of times, people just bury the issue or don't address it. It's not easy dealing with low self esteem. But try positive reinforcement, for example when you get up in the morning and go to the bathroom, look in the mirror and say out loud to your self "I'm a great guy". Do you hold your head down and look at the ground when you're walking somewhere? Don't, hold your head up high and try to be confident, don't slouch when your sitting, look people in the eye when you talk to them. I don't know if this will help, but in general just be happy with who you are!

[DMDaddy]

Thank you very much.. I'm really trying because I'm soooo tired of being sad. It doesn't help anything.