Just sick and tired. #Rant

[Little_Twinkle]

I have been a little since April. It is almost two months now and I am just tired already. I am tired of getting my hopes up to be ghosted. I am tired of Daddies that ask for nudes after talking to me for a couple of hours. I am tired of the unnecessary control (like don't tell me to do something that makes no sense and when I ask why; you say because "I say so"). I am getting to the point where I am just direct because being sweet no longer helps. I am tired of dealing with daddies that have no problem solving skills at all. Like you are meant to be the mature one in this relationship why can't you speak up when something upsets you instead of having me play the guessing game. I am tired of bring treated like entertainment or a rebound for when that little you stopped talking to me for isn't what you expected now I have to pick up the pieces and mend you. I am tired of the lack of trust, or the you are taking to long to reply so I will block you. I am tired of being punished for the sins of others. I am tired of being punished sexually all the damn time. I am tired of being forced to skype. To tell you what I am wearing. For Pete sake why can't things just be rosey. I am tired of having to hear how your ex little used to now I don't want to. Learn how to take a damn complement, it is ok for you to be handsome, it is ok for me to tell how how special you are doesn't mean I want your money, I don't need your damn money. I am not like that. I am tired of hearing how other littles just wanted to be spoilt so you stopped spoiling because you felt used. If I have survived not being spoilt by my biological parents I really will survive not getting stuff from you. I am tired of not being given chance because of my race.

 

I just want to love and be loved back is that to much to ask. It is hard enough to be a middle now having unnecessary strain makes this worse.

 

I am generalising based on my experiences

Edited June 7, 2017 by Little_Twinkle

[Guest gentille_dove]

i totally know what you mean! there’s a lot of shallow fellows around here and it’s so hard to find a diamond in the rough. even people who are halfway decent that i’ve spoken to will try to jump right in in trying to get closer to me and whatnot and i get very uncomfortable very quickly. like, i don’t know you, why are you trying to cuddle me ??? 

 

one daddy flat out quit talking to me when i said don’t call me petnames because i’m not yours to give them to. i’m firm and know my boundaries, and some “daddies” get offended by my speaking up for myself--which tells me all i need to know about them. it shows a lack of respect and true understanding of how this dynamic is supposed to work. you can’t just order someone around and walk all over them because you slap the dom / daddy label on yourself. 

 

​don’t even get me started on the one-liners either good lord. what are you wearing, what’s a turn on, etc. drives me nuts. i can see through your game and it’s not working, rather i’m getting bored and ready to move on. 

 

i feel like we’d have a lot to talk about and could probably be good friends. : ) i’ll send you a request ! 

Edited June 7, 2017 by gentille_dove

[StefanC71_UK]

I'm sorry you've had those experiences. And there are plenty of fake daddies out there. I just want to assure you that genuine daddies do exist, do take time to get to know you, dont ask for nudes etc.

 

In my limited experience, I find simply getting to know someone takes time, it can be weeks before either person commits to calling the other their daddy or their little. 

 

Communication is always key for both people, including what you do and don't like to be called, available time, what apps you are and arent comfortable in using. 

 

Some of us do pay attention and do try to be the best we can, and those fake daddies out there, well they kind of give the good ones a bad rep.

 

You will find one that is genuinely good.

[Ariana]

When I first discovered DDLG I was very clueless and unaware. Lots of "daddies" took advantage of that but having no experience of what a real daddy was I had no idea and thought it was normal and I should do what they said. Of course none of these "relationships" lasted long and I was hurt countless time. It still effects me today and I'm still struggling with depression and self harm.

 

Then I came across websites like this forum and I learned so many things! I found out how a daddy SHOULD act and how they SHOULD treat me and it became so clear. I gave up looking for a daddy and my little side went quiet for a long time..

 

Until one day I met the most amazing man! He was funny, caring, handsome and attentive. Everything a daddy should be. He was completely vanilla and never had anything close to a bdsm relationship but was never creeped out and didn't ask questions when I accidentally slipped into little space around him. He just accepted me and turned out to love being my daddy when I introduced him to DDLG.

 

What I'm saying is I know what you're feeling. I know the sadness, anger, helplessness.

 

All I can say to you is your daddy is out there, waiting for you and probably in a situation and place you would never expect! Don't loose hope! Everyone has a happy ending eventually n.n

[B_ly83]

Hi twinkle, don't give up hope. You know qualities you are looking for in a Daddy. Don't waiver on what you are looking for and now with your knowledge that you've gained, you can weed out the "fake" ones. Just keep your chin up and everything will work itself out. *Huggies*

[Ami29]

Omg..I faced almost the same..but still I have a hope that there is the right daddy for every little..and the perfect little for every daddy..but on the way to find each other we have to stumble upon some of the fakes and the weirds..but I really wanna ask those weird ones whyyyyyy it's hard enough being true to your self and we don't need you guys making it even harder for us to trust..thank goodness I learnt how to pick up the warning signs whenever I talk to one of those creatures..lol.

FYI I am originally from Africa, so I know what you mean about the assumptions some make..lol..like please I might be a little but that does not mean I don't have a career,life or dreams I want to achieve.the fact some have the guts to think of littles/middles as gold diggers makes me wanna spray them with hot chili sauce..but again as some said these creatures don't represent all the daddies..and there are some real daddies out there that would give it all just not to hurt any little/middle..sooo let's stay hopeful..and strong ..never let those creatures bring your spirit down..fighting ^^

[chubbylilwolfcub]

Edited June 7, 2017 by chubbylilwolfcub

[PartyAnimal]

Relationship (of any sort) are work.  Both the Daddy and the little goes through times of want, need, frustration, and loneliness.  I think having a forum like this one in which we can vent is a helpful thing.  Just reading the responses you've received already testifies to this.  You have seen that you are not alone in your experiences and frustrations.  You have received both encouragement and empathy.  Both Daddies and little's have given you their perspectives.  I am glad you are here.  I am glad that you felt safe enough to share.  I am glad that you are seeing the benefit of opening up and being willing to show some vulnerability in a place like this.  I know it has helped me a lot tto.

 

ps, gentille dove, you are absolutely right when you stated, "you can’t just order someone around and walk all over them because you slap the dom / daddy label on yourself. "