Help

[Taken101]

Okay this is going to be fairly long so if you're not interested please leave now.

 

My little is very complex. She is a little but due to some mental health issues she is overly stressed most of the time and becomes convinced she's running out of time. This causes her to NOT go into little space. She also doesn't enjoy typical little activities like colouring, cartoons, movies. The only Disney movies she enjoys are Bambi and Tangled. She doesn't own pacis or soppy cups.

 

Now this doesn't really sound like a little but whenever she does go into her little space she becomes very little but still doesn't enjoy little activities. So I'm left in a conundrum. I enjoy being a caregiver. It's relaxing for me to look after, spoil, interact and do little space activities with my littles. It helps me release my stress as well. It gets even harder because it's a long distance relationship.

 

Sometimes I've barely managed to catch myself from forcing her into little space which I know from experience and research should not be done. I just really need some help on this. I love her to bits but I'm starting to wonder if this is really what I want. Sorry for rambling. I just need ideas so that we're both happy in the realationship. I don't want to lose her but at the same time I need to be fulfilled myself.

 

Constructive answers are welcome. Not hate or useless comments.

[DaddyAlphaca]

My advice, first don't force her, nothing brought up from forcing turned up good.

 

Second, talk to her, be open about what you feel and what she might feel or thinking about all of these stuff.

 

Last, this is just my opinion, everyone had their own way to live. But, for me, it's not easy to love someone. You can fall for someone easily, but it's not easy to love someone with your deepest heart.

 

Put your love to her as your priorities, don't leave someone just because you are not fulfilled. Because not everyone might able to fill your heart like she did, although getting someone who can fullfil your needs always will be easier.

 

There are several ways, but the most important is talking to her openly about everything and see what's the results by talking.

 

I won't recommend this since I'm a monogamous daddy/person, but you can ask her if you want to be poly. But you SHOULD get her agreement.

 

I wish you the best! And Good Luck

[Himedere-Chan]

Have you tried talking to her about this? Maybe simply telling her how you feel will help her calm down. Maybe she needs a professional to help her stress. Or just maybe you two are not compatible for each other, no one's perfect however and you will have to make a few comfortable compromises with your partner no matter who they are, key word 'comfortable', if you feel like you NEED a little that does more child like things then go find one that suits your needs and hope you fit theirs.

In summary, go with your gut feelings, and do what's best for you. I hope this helps and I hope you two find happiness.

[KiggysDaddy]

Talk to her. This might be something she's been thinking about as well, and if she's noticed it's bothering you, its probably bothering her to bits wondering what she did wrong. What I like to do is write my feelings out in a letter format "Dear Princess,..." I would also try to comfort her a bit, saying "You're not a bad little" etc. 

[tayiie]

Maybe she is the kind of little that just doesnt like little activities? and if you truly need someone who likes that a lot then maybe you should look for someone else.

 

Her mental issues might also be blocking her from being able to be the little she might be inside. Or it may also be why she feels like a little.

 

if you LOVE her, best thing is to talk to her, gently. She sounds very vulnerable so try to make her feel that she hasnt done anything wrong but that you have some thoughts about your relationship with her. When I had my first daddy, we had MANY talks about such things, my behaviour, feelings, his feelings etc. It made our bond grow stronger and our relationship last longer.

[Princess-P]

Your little sounds a lot like myself. Stress is huge and often impacts all aspects of our lives. Its so negative but also so hard to get rid of. The time thing I can totally understand. Even when I find myself with a free hour I panic like there's something I should be doing. AMD while I do like some "little" activities like colouring, after taking care of my daughter I'm all done in for kid stuff.

 

Also little space doesn't have to be a designated space. Sometimes its good to just partake in activities you enjoy and put a little spin on it. Things that my Daddy does to help me are; if I'm taking a bath he will add bubbles to it. And will wash my hair. Its a small gesture and makes me feel very cared for. Or he will tuck me in and cuddle me when I have to go to bed early because I'm on shift work even though he's not going to bed.

 

We play board games that are silly, video games that are more nostalgic rather than childish, and when we go out to dinner he orders for me or will tie my lose shoelace rather than let me do it.

 

Sometimes its a matter of the small things that remind you that your a Caregiver/ little. Not always the child like accessories. A lot of littles are not fans of Disney or cartoons or typical superficial little items. Its the bigger picture.

 

If she's finding it difficult to go into full blown little space (or if she's like myself and just doesn't have a designated little space) take care of her in ways that she needs to remind her she's little and to make you feel satisfied.

[Taken101]

Thanks for all the great replies it helps a lot. I'll probably mix and match your opinions and work it in but it's really appreciated. If anyone else is looking at this thread feel free to post more replies they'll be appreciated.

[Taken101]

Thanks for all the great replies it helps a lot. I'll probably mix and match your opinions and work it in but it's really appreciated. If anyone else is looking at this thread feel free to post more replies they'll be appreciated.