Akward Little Needs Guidance

[LittleMissSquish]

I was raised that my sexuality is to be covered up at all times, it wasnt an okay thing to express sexuality or to be "inaprorpiate" and i was often punished for slip up behavior of the like.

 

My parents were strict against dating and it wasnt an allowed, in fact i wasnt even allowed to have male friends. All of this has led me to be a very reserved person when it comes to affection that isnt aimed at family.

 

This seems like an odd thing to start with but it has had a seriois effect on my little space.

 

I have always recognized as a little but because of how i was brought up ive always been really quiet about it. However now that Ive found someone who makes me feel more comfortable I just dont know how to express myself.

 

However Im also not sure if he even wants to be my Daddy.

 

I suppose what im trying to get at is if anyone could maybe help me feel more comfortable. Perhaps other littles who are un a similar boat to me.

 

I dont have an issue, i know what i want to say, i know what i want from my daddy. I just dont know how to go about getting what i want across, every time i try i feel very embarassed and tense.

 

Its just very frustrating because it hinders my ability to be trusting of my Daddy for fear of o punishment or rejection.

[Guest Princessaj]

Hi Princess Nika, thank you so much for inviting us to be part of your adventure..

 

Your post really inspired me to share from my heart and soul. Let's see if I am understanding you...you want a few things to go on at the same time...

 

1. Being comfortable with your identity as a sexual being for yourself and also about sharing it with someone else.

2. Being comfortable and confident communicating things that you have not really had a chance to be appreciated for... your feelings, emotions and being you.

3. Being comfortable trying to be a sexual being, little, friend, trusting and so many other things that goes into having a Daddy.

 

The reoccurring theme is "being comfortable." This takes time and patience with yourself first and foremost. Its like a muscle, repetition and gradual increases will get you far. Don't try to do any "heavy lifting" too fast or you will hurt yourself. I am staying in "self." You can have lots of dialogue with yourself to make yourself more confident. Try keeping a diary. No one is going to know what you are writing. Maybe try meditation? There are some amazing youtube videos to help with this. Someone asked about it a while back and I went to see if there was something that could help a little meditate. I found some fantastic meditations for children that fit quite nicely for littles. Be kind to yourself. Keep breathing. 

 

You can do this kind of practice at the same time as you are working on sharing with your Daddy too. Try writing what you want to say. Get it out of your head and in front of you. Revise it as you see fit. Sometimes when I want to be calm and clear with a conversation, I actually make a "date" to talk. I give the other person an "agenda," a short email about what I want to talk about. This may seem silly, but you have no idea how preparation can really make you stronger to approach what you want to say. Your Daddy should respect and appreciate that you are doing so much to engage in really meaningful dialogue for the both of you. If you want to, you can practice with a friend in advance. Getting to know someone, anyone, is a process and takes time. Have fun with it.

 

I actually have suggested on many occasion to play the "Getting to Know You" game. Start with each of you writing 10 things you want to know about each other. They can be about anything, in real life, DDlg...anything. Best they are not yes or no questions, but that which will inspire interaction and discussion. You slice up the questions, fold them up and stick them in a bowl, anyone can do this long distance too. You choose one, he answers...then you answer the same question, talk, talk, talk...next his question, you answer, he answers and you know the rest. Keep playing with new sets of questions over many interactions and then before you know it, your walls will come down and you will be so much more comfortable with each other.

 

The last thing that I want to suggest that has changed my life is that I have to be able to be me and not care about approval from someone else. I am not perfect, but the more I practice be me, its amazing how it feels. My Daddy is going through a rough patch. I am a very good soul with so many blessings to share. Today, Daddy and I were talking and it was the very best feeling knowing that I was appreciated for just wanting to be helpful. No matter if I did or didn't, I am so high on the knowing that he was so grateful for my care of him. 

 

You have so much to give and be appreciated for. Life is a never ending game show. Sometimes we feel like we win (we get acknowledged and accepted) and sometimes we feel like we loose (maybe we get disappointed by someone judging us). Accept yourself where ever you are on the journey. Make it an adventure and you will find others that want to come along. Choose to be in love with yourself. Hugs