princesskittydoom Posted May 3, 2017 Report Posted May 3, 2017 First off, this is going to be LONG, I think I am just still trying to process this and I apologize in advance but this whole situation has mind fucked me to a degree I didn't realize was possible. I have no one I can talk to about this. I have known I was a "little" for a few years, I didn't know the term or the community but I knew what I liked, about a year ago I sort of stumbled upon the community. A few months ago I was browsing reddit, not looking for anything particular just sort of looking around and as it is bound to happen saw a personal that caught my attention. I messaged him on a whim, never having done anything like that before I was very nervous and immediately regretted my decision. He was all the way in Seattle and I in Florida so what was I thinking? As I was contemplating deleting my account he messaged me. He was sweet and smart, didn't ask for pictures and seemed genuinely interested in me. He had been in the lifestyle for several years and said if I had any questions he would try and answer them when I said I was not sure at all what I was doing. He didn't ask to be my Daddy right away and even said we could be friends and see what happened. He told me to watch out for fake daddies and guys who just wanted pictures, he said he was a big believer in positive reinforcement and rewarding good behavior rather than punishing bad. We decided he would call me that night to talk. We spoke for several hours and he read me a bedtime story to help me fall asleep. The next day I was still on the fence and unsure if I wanted to move so fast, so he offered to have me talk to a friend of his who was a little, I said no that I was ok but he pointed out that I didn't have any little friends and it might help to have someone to talk to who had been there, she met her Daddy on reddit too so it might help to talk to someone who has been there. I was still hesitant when I got her message, he had given it to her anyway, I was annoyed but after talking to her I realized he was right, it helped to have someone to talk to. She was super nice and told me if I wasn't comfortable to just stop.They both texted me on skype alllll day, I honestly had trouble being able to talk to both of them and do everything I needed to. We decided to skype so that we could make sure we were who we said and all that. I spent the next weeks talking to both of them constantly. He goes to California for 3 weeks, he tells me his best friends marriage is falling apart and he needs to go help with his goddaughter. He sends me pictures with her and of her being adorable. He also has to do some stuff at the German consulate, he is half German and half French. His grandmother died and he went to France. We still skyped every night and almost all day on the weekends, he learned all of my cuddly animals names, and talked to them on skype about how smart and funny and beautiful I was. He set up chores and rewards, he went out of his way to get me a donkey cuddly animal because he knows they are my favorite animal, and two otters, one huge one little because he thinks they are super cute. I got a bedtime and he made sure I made doctors appointments, he liked to watch me color on skype and helped pick my nail polish. He wrote stories about me as a bunny princess who went on adventures, with pictures! Every night I got a bedtime story, he told me all I had to do was ask and he would come see me. He is the type of Daddy that you can only dream of, too good to be true. Laura, the little he introduced me to, was going through some hard times and she and I talked a lot about her life, how she met her Daddy (who she calls Papi) and their relationship, her job, she is a nurse, she and I talk extensively for this whole time, I cant stress that enough, we talk a lot and about all sorts of things, she tells me about her day at work and all of these things. She sends me pictures of her and Papi. I could go on and on but you get the general idea. Now we get to the reason for this post, I will say I was not oblivious to the fact that this seemed too good to be true, I am a 26 year old woman, and while I have never been in this situation I am not stupid. I asked for his FB and he said he didn't like social media, ok, I have seen him anyway so I know he isn't lying about that, I didn't have a face book until recently myself. Laura said she didn't have one because Papi was super jealous, I think ok, she is younger, 22, easily swayed by what he wants, its unhealthy but not overly suspicious, I know a few girls who deleted their FB when a boyfriend told them to. So I google them, first and last name and the respective cities they live in. Nothing comes up. He says he owns a business, Google it, nothing. No business license, no address. I facebook his last name, click on the first one that pops up, pictures of his god daughter with a man who is obviously her father... not the same man he said was her father though.... I should confront him then, but I think there must be some sort of explanation. I am happy. HE makes me happy, for the first time in my life I am comfortable in my skin, this person knows everything about me, he urges me to do better, he helps me. Finally someone wants me for something other than sex. I cant deal with whatever this is right now. When he gets back from California we keep skyping, he says he will come for my birthday, he already booked his ticket. I think i will ask him about his god daughter then. Then it happens, one night he is laying on the floor and I notice the reflection on the TV, the pictures reflected look exactly like the ones that were behind him when he was in California. He is lying, and now I am sure, they were hanging in a weird way with different color frames, no way to deny it. I mention they look the same, he blows it off as nothing, they arent the same he says. I cant stop thinking about it, I ask him to send me a picture, he says he will in the morning, I say I want it now, he makes a big fuss, he knows he is caught I think. He sends the picture, I dont say anything, mostly because if I open my mouth I will throw up. I feel sick. He asks if i want a bedtime story, I say no, but he keeps pressing so I relent. When it is over I get up and go to the bathroom, dry heave into the toilet, cry, then suck it up. I walk into my room and shut the laptop, i dont want to look at him when i confront him, more importantly i dont want him to look at me, to see what he did to me. The whole thing makes me feel physically ill, he says he is a pathological liar, he cant help it, he really cares for me. He was never going to come for my birthday, he lied about his first name, and his last name, then he didn't. He never leaves his house, people don't talk to him anymore, his girlfriend of 10 years left him over it. The next hour is fucking awful. He cries, I cry, but I don't let him hear it. Laura is him. HE MADE UP AN ENTIRE FUCKING PERSON. It is fucking MIND BLOWING. I cant believe a word he says and it is killing me. I want him still, he makes me happy. I ask if he has done this before, he says no. I keep asking questions knowing I cant believe the answers but wanting some sort of explanation. Eventually he says he is too upset and hangs up. I threaten to talk to the guy with the pictures of his so called god daughter, I am hurt and I want an explanation why he did this. I dont get one, though I know I would never be satisfied with whatever he says. I ask if he is going to do it again, he says he doesn't know. I could go on and on and on. I know, I know, I already have. But I guess I just wanted people to understand what happened, the scope of it I guess, so maybe someone could give me advice. Or something. I still want to call him and see him and I know I shouldn't but I cant make it stop and I don't know what to do. 1
Guest Princessaj Posted May 3, 2017 Report Posted May 3, 2017 Hi, thanks for taking the time to share yourself with us... Been there, done that and a whole bag of fried catfish with some chips on the side. Your instincts are right, you did find the answers you needed, not wanted. He is a part of an ancient tribe called "The Con Men" that can't seem to get a life, so they either steal one or make one up. At least he didn't ask you for money after he was kidnapped, got away from his captors, but they beat him so hard that the pictures that they sent were horrific. Yes, the drama of catfishing. Or when I was going to do a background check on someone I knew for a year of consistent dating, talking ...and I went in his wallet to find he had 4 identities when we were in Hawaii and he had my airplane ticket. All the checking on social media and google searching is right on. Good on you! Since everything can be invented, there is no sure fire way of calling them on their crap. I think a game of "I'll show you mine if you show me yours"....what would the man/Daddy have in his life that you can and want to verify? Now, I tell them that my best friend is in the FBI (it's the truth) and wants to meet them. Being vulnerable and transparent isn't our best feature. It's a shame. The more that I have to Adult to protect myself as a middle really is as far away from DDlg I can imagine. Hugs 1
Guest mlkykit Posted May 3, 2017 Report Posted May 3, 2017 I've been in a situation like this once before, granted I was very young and equally stupid, but the only difference between my situation and yours is that the man created another man rather than a woman; a supposed roommate and good friend he met online. When I finally figured it out after weeks of questioning myself, it had me reeling for weeks. I was disgusted with myself more than with him; I couldn't believe I had been so stupid and blind to blatant red flags. Situation aside, we all know it's a stupid situation - no need to rehash that - and the man has literally told you he's a pathological liar and he can't help it, so you already know you can't believe a word he says, so no need to rehash that either. I don't think what happened has really sunken in for you as yet, you're still processing and reeling. In my honest opinion, there's no happy future for you with this man. All the explanations and love proclamations in the world will never make up for the fact that he's a pathological liar who, instead of being upfront with you, faked a whole other person for what; to gain sympathy, your trust, your love? Will you be happy seeing someone who you have to second-guess every time they say something? Do you think you'd be happy with analyzing every word of what your partner says to ensure it's the truth for however long you'll be together? Think about that every time you find yourself craving a phone call with him or wanting to see him. 2
BabySwe Posted May 3, 2017 Report Posted May 3, 2017 I'm sure a lot of people is going to tell you to leave him, that you can't stay together with a liar. But I guess what I would ask myself if I was you would be 1. Do I really want to be with this person, does he make me happy? and 2. Can you live with him being a pathological liar? He will surely lie to you again, over and over. Basically you won't be able to trust anything he says. But it is really up to you to decide if you feel that that's worth it. If you want a relationship where you can enjoy yourself (as you say you have) but not trust what he's saying, knowing fully well how he is. That part I am afraid no one can help you with, you will just have to feel yourself what feels right for you Good luck 1
DaddyNewYork Posted May 3, 2017 Report Posted May 3, 2017 (edited) This is making me nauseous too, I'm sorry. I've been there before. Honestly just cut off contact. It's not your job to fix him. I'm sure he has family. Don't feel obligated. He hurt you pretty badly Edited May 3, 2017 by DaddyNewYork 2
FLdaddy Posted May 3, 2017 Report Posted May 3, 2017 Omg! I cannot believe that has happened to you. On behalf of all the daddy's out here we are sorry you had to deal with that. Do not go back with him! If he lied that much to you then he will always lie to you! The sad thing is with the advent of the internet and the flooded websites about ddlg and bdsm many guys can read an article or two and have a lot of valuable information to pass themselves off as someone whom knows what they are doing. The stuff he has told you about to spot fake daddy's is all over tumblr, Instagram, and who k ow what else. The problem I see is you have these Gus out here that are like sharks. Once they smell the blood in the water the start to circle so the can move in for the kill. Now I'm not saying all the guys are like that! I have met and talked to many daddy's whom are some of the best men I know! Just remember to take your time and get to know the next person. I'm sure that will be a very long time before that happens. The thing you need to do now is surround yourself with your stuffies and friends and get over this. You will be surprised how that will help. Break all the rules and routine that he gave to you. This will get you out of "his" headspace. If you need a figure in your life to give you direction or structure seek a friend that you know and see if they can help you out for a bit until you are ready to get back on the horse. Thank you for sharing this difficult story ! You need to see the good that has come from this. You may have just saved another little from going through the same thing. I know its hard, but life will get better and you will move on. 2
LittleRae Posted May 3, 2017 Report Posted May 3, 2017 Oh my goodness, thank you so much for sharing this story with us. This is so sad to read, and my heart goes out to you. But I agree with others who have commented on this. He lied and conned you, and that burns the bridge of trust between the two of you. I understand that it's really hard to let someone go, especially a Daddy figure, but if he's not willing to be truthful with you, then this is a relationship that is unhealthy. I really hope this all works out for you. And I am a listening ear, or a loving supporter if you need someone to talk to. 2
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