*Trigger warning* What's wrong with me *Update*

[Roselyn_Moon]

Edited May 4, 2017 by Roselyn_Moon

[PennyGoodfellow]

Based on what you wrote here, it doesn't seem like this is a healthy relationship anymore. You've said you've tried talking to him, and I hope you're doing so without the DDLG dynamic - adult to adult. 

 

Are there any resources you can use? Couples therapy, family or friends that you can reach out to in order to get you to a safe place? I'm not sure if you meant hitting as in domestic violence, or hitting in the BDSM "spanking." Either way, it's not ok if it's not consensual and I urge you to stay safe and try to find some local resources that can get you out of (what sounds to me) like a dangerous situation. 

 

This is all me reading into the post, as I'm sure you know it's hard to read emotion and tone through text, so if I'm wrong, feel free to ignore me. 

[Roselyn_Moon]

[DaddyNewYork]

Go home to your parents.

There's no reason a man should hit a good woman.

 

A man should only hit if he's in danger. I make that exception.

 

You're not a punching bag. You're a human being. Go home sort the rest out later.

[Frog]

What concerns me most is "starting to hit me more." This tells me much more. I've known close friends who were almost killed because of domestic violence. If he's hitting you, and now more, then it will probably only get worse, not better.

 

Run away, stay with your parents, or even call emergency services (911 or 999 depending on where you live) or visit an emergency hospital department. Please.

Edited April 30, 2017 by Frog

[Nymph]

To answer your question, you don't value yourself enough... that is probably the only thing wrong with you.

 

I think it's great news you are staying at your parents sweety, please stay there for a while until your mind is clear. Sometimes when you find yourself in an abusive relationship your mind gets a bit foggy and putting some distance is the easier solution. It will be hard at first but before you know it things will make sense, I've been there.

 

You can't truly love unless you love yourself first. With that in mind, he already is unloved. What you are feeling is a strong attachment, a very unhealthy one I may add, for this man who does not deserve to be given the tittle of daddy. This is more common than you think, I think most girls will feel this way with our first love, the guy involved makes the whole difference if this story turns into a fairytale or horror one. Don't stick around in hopes it gets better after you have crossed the line between those two. I

 

f you don't know when that is, then I would say it's when he becomes verbally abusive, Ideally you can catch it before that when he is being emotionally abusive... it's already too late after the first time he hits you.

 

It's not about hating him or putting the blame on him, it's about you acknowledging what a beautiful wonderful gift you are giving him with your submission and that you find someone that will cherish it. People change, yes. But not to that degree... he just got tired of pretending, this is his true self.

[Daddyslilhoneybee]

Leave, and leave now. From one domestic violence victim to another. This will not get better. You need to get out and not look back. Take care of yourself. It sounds like your parents are being supportive and offering you a place to stay - take them up on that offer. You deserve much better.

[Guest LittleCatLover]

Hello Roselyn, 

firstly well done of already going to your parents and asking for help here! It is so brave of you and I can't imagine how you must feel, but I hope I can still help you a bit.

I do understand that you don't want to hurt your "daddy" by leaving, but he hasn't been showing you much compassion and sometimes we do have to be selfish and put ourselves first. If you can't be that selfish, then think about how you are doing it for all the other people in your life that you love and cherish and who, I am sure, don't want to see you suffer while being helpless to get you away. It is wonderful that your parents can support you and care! 

It definitely isn't your fault that your partner has started this unacceptable behaviour! But you must let go, so that both of you can learn from this experience and hopefully build a better future, even if it means you will be apart for that. Sometimes it just isn't meant to be and you will later on see that you would suit another person better and will be happier. 

It hurts now, but in the end it will be better for the both of you!

I hope you will be good again and wish you the best of luck! 

 

Sincerely, LCL

P.S. I never have been in your situation, but if you ever just want to tell someone not involved more and just want to offload, then feel free to message me  

[Guest LittleCatLover]

Oh and I just found this on the internet:

 

there is this app for people in abusive relationships. It's called Aspire News and it is disguised as a regualr news app, but when you go to the Help section of the app, it leads you to domestic violence resources and also has a "Go Button" that when you press it, of you are in a compromising situation, alerts local authorities as well as local shelters and starts recording everything that is going on.

If you are looking up resources on the app and your abuser is near, simply press the X button and it brings you to a random news page. Same goes for the actual foundation website. 

 

It is completly FREE (available in for Android AND iPhone)

 

I just hope that someone that needs it sees it. Of course you shouldn't stay if you are being abused, but it probably is more easily said than done. 

[Roselyn_Moon]

Thank you

Oh and I just found this on the internet:

 

there is this app for people in abusive relationships. It's called Aspire News and it is disguised as a regualr news app, but when you go to the Help section of the app, it leads you to domestic violence resources and also has a "Go Button" that when you press it, of you are in a compromising situation, alerts local authorities as well as local shelters and starts recording everything that is going on.

If you are looking up resources on the app and your abuser is near, simply press the X button and it brings you to a random news page. Same goes for the actual foundation website.

 

It is completly FREE (available in for Android AND iPhone)

 

I just hope that someone that needs it sees it. Of course you shouldn't stay if you are being abused, but it probably is more easily said than done.

[Guest Princessaj]

Hi Roselyne,

 

Yes, I too have had to face this dangerous situation.

 

Maybe it won't get to this, but here is a link to the "Restraining Orders" information for the state of Texas.

 

Hugs