share your success stories!

[Baby Neko]

Hey Everyone! 

I know some circles frown upon this but I thought we could share stories of those who have successfully introduced their previously vanilla partners to this type of relationship.

We've all heard the horror stories and, while it is most important to NEVER force an unwilling partner into your kinks (!!), I wanted to make a positive place for stories about people who's partners responded well.

 

 I was afraid to tell my current partner for a long time so I want to show others that it's not all doom and gloom and that introducing a newbie is not necessarily a lost cause. 

[Guest Ginger]

Hmm... I wouldn't say he was completely vanilla, because he was clearly into D/s prior to meeting me, but I did introduce him to ddlg. He didn't appear disgusted or anything. All I told him was that it's kind of like D/s but more caring. I did tell him Dd stood for daddy dom, which probably clued him in on the dynamic a bit. I believe he's done some research on his own since, he's amazing.

 

Long story short, I just explained to him what I felt the dynamic was and left out titles. He's basically done the rest on his own.

[Lil' Miss Dolly]

Not sure why anyone would frown on this subject since we were all here at one time or another...

 

My former (kinda present) partner was Vanilla until he was about 30 yrs old. I was always up front about my attraction to BDSM. He decided he wanted to give it a go and LOVED it. i have always been Little (before i even knew what little was) so when I discovered the DD/lg community something just clicked. By this time I was already living as a Sub in a TPE so When i brought up that I'd like to make this part of our Dynamic.. he was all for it. He did a ton of research over a few months and we sat down one day and revised our contract to include the DD/lg aspects that i wanted included. He still loves it, Loves being a Daddy Dom.. it suits him. 

[Harley_Quinn]

I cant say daddy was completely vanilla considering we started as dom and sub and went from there lol but

 

I introduced daddy to his sadist side and his daddy side! He had previously had a little that wasn't really a little. He didn't think the lifestyle was the way it actually is so I reintroduced him into it. Our playtime life is a whole lot of the sadist masochist side of BDSM but outside of playtime he's a great daddy :3

[alotalittle]

I'm going to share a slightly different story because it speaks volumes about the bravery required to introduce your partner to something new/different in terms of sex and sexuality.

 

I was very open with my partner about being "kinky" when we first got together. After a couple months, we introduced the DDlg dynamic into our relationship and lived that way for the first year and a half of our relationship. Then, problems started arising both in our sex lives and outside of it. We had to work through a lot of stuff, but my partner finally had to explain that his needs weren't being met. My partner is genderfluid and requires time to express his femininity both in and out of the bedroom. It was huge for him to tell me all about his needs. He needed me to be his Domme sometimes. He also needed some gentle, more vanilla sex while in his feminine mood as well. We transitioned into being switches (which we both love). I fully support his feminine side and I'm so happy that he gets to share it with me.

 

Telling your partner about a very important side of yourself is incredibly hard at times. Even though my partner and I were never "vanilla", it required a lot of bravery for him to open up about this side of himself. If being little or being a CG is a huge part of you, then you should tell your partner. You never know what the response will be, but it could be an incredibly positive one. Also, it helps to be patient with each other when opening up about these sorts of things. They may need time to adjust to a new dynamic, time to learn about it, or simply time to think about it. 

 

I hope this wasn't too off-topic

Edited April 28, 2017 by alotalittle

[Guest Bunnyblossom]

My Daddy was fortotally vanillz. 

 

I didn't know how to bring it up, and was nervous about it. Y'know, 'cause of the stigma attached.

 

But then was like "Hey... Daddy"

And he was like "O_O lolwut"

And just kept doing it til he was numb to it and eventually guiltily liked it.

 

If there's one thing that cheers me up more than anything it's messin' with my Daddy's head.

He's always so proud and impressed. We're perfecterooni. 

 

He also doesn't know anything about ddlg.  

He's a natural Daddy M beary proud of him too. 

Edited April 28, 2017 by MilkPop

[Baby Neko]

Not sure why anyone would frown on this subject since we were all here at one time or another...

 

From my experience it can be a taboo topic because some people assume if one partner introduced a newbie then they must have forced them into being their sub/Dom/little/Cg etc. Because if the person was really into it they would have realised on their own.

 

Personally I disagree and I see kinda it like this: my partner might show me a tv show I never would have bothered watching by myself, either because it didn't grab my attention or because I'd never even heard of it. But then when we watched it I really liked it and I now call it one of my favourite shows. I might even be the one to suggest watching it sometimes now.

 

This is a very shallow example but it's the simplest comparison.I can make

 

 

I hope this wasn't too off-topic

 

Not at all it's important to remember communication and expressing your needs goes both ways. I'm glad you two found out what works best for you.

Edited April 30, 2017 by Baby Neko

[Guest littleloveslars]

Well. When i told Daddy about ddlg he banged me on the floor. But we were already involved in D/s. Cant say its been easy, but he was certainly receptive.

[HisHoneybee]

I found my Daddy four months ago and he is my happiness and my sunshine! He takes care of me, loves me, guides me, nurtures me when I'm sad, gives me tasks to keep me thinking about him, and is my best friend. He is intelligent, compassionate, sexy, sweet, strict, bossy, and everything in between. I am so madly in love with him and I only regret not having met him earlier in life. He is my mushroom farmer, my King Bee, my love, my Daddy, my favorite, and my mind reader! I love him millions and squillions!!!!!