Trust issues

[mystery24816]

My little girl occasionally has moments where she can't trust anyone. As in everything anyone says she thinks is a lie meant to hurt her. Is there anything I can say to have her at least try to believe me? I kinda feel useless in moments like these

[Guest]

As someone who lets their over thinking take over from time to time I understand kind of shutting down and shutting everyone out.

 

The best advice I can give is let her know you are there for her no matter what

[DaddyMs]

I Agree with Arya; I'd also recommend giving her time to trust you more; depending on what caused her to be untrusting, it can be a long slow process but show her you're patient and caring and understand her and she'll come around. 

[Eva]

I can understand your litte. I also have problem with trust. I always think that somebody is joking at me and that stuff. I really don't know what can help. Maybe you should tell her that you won't hurt her,  and that she can trust you. Give here time and lots of good words.

[Antoinette]

Hey, Anni here - the most irrational, overthinking and distrusting person ever at times! The best thing you can do, is to make sure you never give her reason to distrust you. I would say though, it is largely her responsibility to figure out why she is so distrusting, what makes her feel these things and most importantly how she can get over these emotions - with not only your help, but her own help. In order to get over trust issues, I know it sounds silly but, you have to trust yourself. Little things like saying: 

 

''Oh no, I can't do that.''

''I'm not good enough.''

''Someone else could do it better.'' 

 

Everything a person says about themselves, to put THEMSELVES down makes them lose faith and trust in themselves. You have to trust yourself first. My New Year's Resolution this year was to trust more - and I'm sticking to it. It's hard, it can be scary (really scary) but it's necessary and so, so, so worth it. I can't tell you how much happier I've been now that I can just... Trust. I'm sure she'll be happier for it too!

[Guest ASerpent]

I'm sort of in the same boat, having trust issues from time to time myself. There's always a reason why people have trust issues. I hope she told you the reason for hers, so you can at least understand the way she feels and why she acts the way she does. When it comes to me I tend to ask the same things over and over again or I keep questioning things. It makes me feel safe when I know I can actually ask the same question for the 10th time and Daddy will still be patient and always give me an answer. Maybe that's something you could do. Encourage her in asking about things she doubts over and over again. Be patient and keep answering everything she needs to know. That will at least make her feel safe and understood.

 

I hope this helps a bit.

Edited April 3, 2017 by ASerpent

[Guest x77]

I'm very guarded. a couple of my exes were physically abusive, not in a consensual BDSM way, I feel like I have to mention that because being a masochist people think I'll take pain as pleasure no matter how it comes - so I'm skittish, I shy away and shut down. When I do shut down a firm but gentle tone helps me, I don't take people seriously when they sound like they're begging for my trust: "pleeeaaase, you look good in that dress! C'mon, everything's fine! Trust mee!" vs. "You look good actually, let's go have fun" - try to switch your wording up, try out different tones, reassure her that keeping her guard up is fine but you'd never plan some elaborate scheme to lie to her and maybe try help her pick apart what she's thinking in a non-critical way - "Noo I'd never cheat on you! Bade I promise, please!" vs. "Nope, I don't like anyone else. I'm happy with you" sounds way more convincing.

[Guest banana]

Maybe you can try just being there for her? 

I sometimes feel like that too but I like when daddy still tries to show me that he cares for me. If she tells you to stop then respect her choice, sometimes it can be just a bad day or I don't know, periods or anything. Just ask her what you can do for her and try to show her that you're doing your best, I'm sure she will see it

[Princess-P]

I may be reading this wrong but to me it sounds like the trust problem isn't one directed at just you. If your little is experiencing paranoia, unable to distinguish reality, or becoming anxious that she's in danger or that someone is "out to get her" then this may be a mental health issue.

 

If that's the case, let's say paranoid schizophrenia for example, there's not a whole lot you can do other than be there for her when she's in crisis. Don't be pushy or say that she should just trust you. Don't play into her sense of danger but also do not ridicule it. Make sure to reassure her that your there when she needs you and unless you fee like she's in danger then back off a bit.

 

Many people have undiagnosed or untreated mental health issues. Finding the right help is the best solution. You can maybe suggest she talks to a professional when she's having a moment of clarity.