Noticing Doms/littles in public

[cutelilpunkin]

I haven't seen anything relating to this topic so if you have answered this before I apologize.

But I was curious to know how people can know or if there are any hints or signs to tell that you are in fact a dominant when out in public minding your own business. So a little can approach you and start a conversation if she just notices you out in public and you guys have never met before? And same for littles. are there any signs that are discreet for Doms to automatically know you're a little when out in public? Because I know not everyone is super comfortable wearing their gear out in public or wearing a onesie out in public.

Thank you!

~cutelilpunkin~

[cutelilpunkin]

I already asked this up on the caregiver part if this website, but there is a second part to the question that I wanted some littlest to be able to answer!

I haven't seen anything relating to this topic so if you have answered this before I apologize.

But I was curious to know how people can know or if there are any hints or signs to tell that you are in fact a dominant when out in public minding your own business. So a little can approach you and start a conversation if she just notices you out in public and you guys have never met before? And NOW what about you littles out there?. are there any signs that are discreet for Doms to automatically know you're a little when out in public? Or even other littles? You could always make a new friend, but Because I know not everyone is super comfortable wearing their gear out in public or wearing a onesie out in public or their diapers caring bottles or even wearing little cute outfits. it's hard to spot a little or a dom, at least for me it is. Any tips would be great or advice on being able to spot one would be amazing.

Thank you!

~cutelilpunkin~

[Guest MeneerM]

Spotting one another is very hard in public because we don't wear our gear and we act normally and in a socially accepted way. Usually I spot submissive tendencies in people quickly. Submissives cannot look you in the eyes for a long time, the look away, mostly downwards. Submissives tend to be polite and shy when I am around. Those are subtile cues I get.

[Daddy's_Babygirl]

Possibly NSFW

 

When Daddy and I first started a D/s dynamic, he went into a local sex shop to get some toys and such. Prior to that we really didn't have much. Well the lady working walked over to him after about 20min of him looking around and asked if his sub was out in the car or at home. He said "excuse me?" Apparently the things we was looking at gave off clues to her. She revealed she was a Dom and that this was a safe place and usually pretty slow during the time we were there. I was out in the car and he came to get me, but I was still too nervous to come in. It doesn't really bother me any more but I tend not to talk to others or make any eye contact, even with the employees there.

 

I am happily taken so I don't think much of what Doms may notice in me out in public. I don't like to talk to people, servers, store employees, anyone really. Because of this, my Daddy orders my food and if we have any questions at stores he asks them. I tend to either stare off or look at the ground when walking about in public, and if I'm exceptionally uncomfortable I am usually wrapping my arm around Daddy's. I tend to ask if I can get something if it wasn't part of what we originally planned. This is in part because he is my Dom and in part because he handle the finances and better knows what bills we have coming up. These are just a few signs I can think of that would indicate to someone our dynamic.

[TheRatQueen]

I think it's generally very hard to spot people. I aim to look unapproachable when I'm in public, not give off cues that I'm a little and/or submissive.

 

If I do happen to be in little space when I'm with Daddy I think there's only a couple things that would give us away. I hold one or two of his fingers instead of his whole hand and he'll also direct me with a hand on my lower back. But that's about it.

[Guest DaddysForeverPrincess]

I wear a cute beaded bracelet with a tiny strawberry on it... I've been asked by a stranger if it's a "little sign".. we both smiled and giggled, then she walked away! I loved being asked

[Frog]

There was also a thread about having an awareness week each month, but I don't know if it's still going on.

[Guest Wolfsbabylove]

I have saw a few Littles in public. I knew by how they were dressed, like one had cat ears and a tail (ok so maybe she was more of a pet or just into the fashion but I was super excited. lol). Also, I recently met a very nice  couple. The woman makes pagan jewelry, so I asked if she could fix my collar and she showed great respect, asking if she could touch my collar and was very discreet in how she spoke about DD/lg , given we were in public with my biological Father and children there.She may not be into DD/lg but she knows enough about it to respect the lifestyle.

[cutelilpunkin]

I have saw a few Littles in public. I knew by how they were dressed, like one had cat ears and a tail (ok so maybe she was more of a pet or just into the fashion but I was super excited. lol). Also, I recently met a very nice couple. The woman makes pagan jewelry, so I asked if she could fix my collar and she showed great respect, asking if she could touch my collar and was very discreet in how she spoke about DD/lg , given we were in public with my biological Father and children there.She may not be into DD/lg but she knows enough about it to respect the lifestyle.

Wow! That sounds like a GREAT experience! Iv never met a little or a daddy Dom out in public before or irl. Obviously I met my daddy, but I'm the one who got him into this lifestyle and he turned out to really like it and he's a really good daddy too.

[LittlePupRune]

Its hard to pick up on who's in the community since many of us are not overt in public out of respect to those around us (since the public has not consented to be part of our kink, so its best to not noticeably advertise). Occasionally I may see someone (its a lot easier if its a couple, cause they're interactions can often hint at the dynamic) that I suspect, but it could also be someone who's not into cg/l but into something that looks similar. I do know some people have ways of signaling the dynamic and lifestyle, but the sense I'm getting is that meeting others is left to munches, meet-ups, online, and such in order to keep it discreet/ not impose it on the public.

[mylittlesidewearsblack]

i've not heard of anything myself, though i do always look for people with collars.

[ThePrincessMinMin]

Thought of this too awhile back! I don't have gear, but I do often incorporate subtle things that can pass as normal, but wear often, like those faux pearl kitth headbands paired with lace frilly collars.

Its not a dead giveaway as most would probably not guess I'm a little, but I think it could be identifiable to other littles or doms perhaps...

..but then again, haven't seen any doms or littles irl for a long time!^^

 

Hmm not sure about doms thou...

Edited April 4, 2017 by ThePrincessMinMin

[DaddyCj86]

For me it's all about the vibes... and as KittenLovesMe said it is alot easier if it is a couple. i have had a few people ask me if i was a Dom... i guess i have a bit of an aura. My first babygirl had a normal necklace for her collar and a few doms knew what it was right away. My current babygirl calls me daddy no matter where we are so that makes it easy to spot us... lol.

[LittleMissyXo]

I dress a bits younger I 'spose. Well, not super duper obviously little like a onesie or anytbings but flat shoesies always, often hairbows, more often than nots in sundresses or "babydoll" style dresses, if I do wears shorts they are usually bright colors or florals. I rarely make eye contact very long. I'm always biting my nails or fiddling with my dress. I don't usually likes to order my own food out either. I think it's easy to tell when someone's submissive but not always necessarily if they're a little..

[Harley_Quinn]

Daddy is a Dom in public if I'm with him lol and I'm pretty little when hes like that. But idk how noticeable it actually is

[aschmizzy]

I always think about this! i always wonder if anyone has ever thought "hmm.. I wonder if she's a little".  I wonder this because i have no idea how prevalent the community is really.

 

It reminds me very clearly of once when a man came up to me in the store and was asking me all kindsa questions about my stuffie and very clearly "baby talking" me. I literally just ran down the aisle away from him, lol. I wasn't sure what to think. Because it felt like he very much knew, but its tricky because there's no definite way to tell without asking straight up! 

 

I honestly have no idea how you would tell someone was a Dom, unless they approached you knowing that you were a little and did something similar to that ^ of course next time i probably wouldnt take off running haha!

[SkunkPrincess]

I'm almost 24/7 in littlespace, so also in public. I always wonder if someone sees me and my sir and wonder 'Oh hey, look! Another Little and their caregiver!'

[Guest ZuZu420]

I've noticed a lot of littles around here and they notice me too cuz I wear all sorts of little gear out but not many have talked to me cuz of how I look so different from all the littles around here..as it says in my profile I'm the weird kid that loves gross bloody gory things and even my little style shows it lol...

[LittleGirlEmilia]

Yes, this is how I have met my closest little friends! I just ask them if they're a little, we hug and we end up BFFs.

 

It's an amazing feeling.

[Daddy's Lil]

My Daddy always wears his "tag" with Daddy written on a leather wrist band when we are together. We don't live together. I always wear my "owned" ring. Although you have to be close and have good eyesite to read them. I do wear my chocker "Daddy's little girl" written on the heart pendant when were in "play" mode. Either out shopping, or meeting for a play in the swinging world. We don't openly play in public. Although I do call him Daddy. But it's all about actions with us. I'm told what if any knickers to wear and or butt plug. When out for food I'm not to look at the menu. Daddy decides for me. I always have to take off my knickers in the loo and then take them back and pass them to Daddy. So we have our own kinks when out and about. Edited April 18, 2017 by Daddy's Lil

[Guest MeneerM]

I am always her Daddy, even in public. We had this thing going on in a restaurant, where the waitress took our order.

As usual I ordered... a sandwich and coffee for myself and then I said: "She gets a chicken sandwich and tea".

The waitress looked a bit confused and asked my little girl: "Do YOU really want that?"

My little girl looked from behind my shoulder and just nodded.

I guess the waitress thought we were a strange couple, but quite frankly we laughed about it afterwards.

[Rantanplan]

I am currently in Japan. You can easily spot at least 2 littles (or very very child like) a day over here.

They are definitely dressed like children in Wonderland. There are also shops specialising on childish dresses/costumes. It couldn't be more obvious.

[Leo_Ascendent]

My Little has a collar (with leash attachment and whatnot), and I have a matching bracelet, so we are kinda obvious, but we also don't care about what boring vanilla people think of us. ^~^

 

EDIT: She also calls me Daddy in public, sho there's that too.

Edited April 21, 2017 by Leo_Ascendent

[Leo_Ascendent]

For me, it would be my bracelet and my Littles matching collar. Both have a leash attachment as well, so I can attach one of desired. Not subtle at all, but then again, I don't care what others think of me. *shrug*

[ThePrincessMinMin]

Hmm I think it would be difficult (although that would be awesome pawsome if we could) as like said prior some of us are not as open in public. I have met another little once in real life, but she was very open about it so it was easier to tell based on how she interacted with her Daddy, how she dressed/ carried herself, etc.

As for myself, unless I specifically say I'm a little, no one would probably be able to tell and would just think I like dressing cute or girly as I tend to wear cutesy clothing and sometimes a collar when out.