I need Daddy's help but....I can't figure out what's wrong :((( HELP!!!

[Lil_pinkprincess]

I adore my daddy! He works really hard, an let's me be little all day at home. But, Lately I have been causing a lot of problems because I don't know why...

I desperately crave my daddy's attention and I feel like I'm running around circles by demanding it. I know acting out gives me the opposite result I want but I don't know how to properly communicate how I feel.

My daddy's says that I'm too difficult and that I cause issues that don't exist. My complaints are that I feel that my little side isn't satisfied. I want my daddy to play with me when he gets home from work but sometimes it is just dinner and bed. I wait all day to see daddy, and I'm very disappointed when I'm laying awake next to him soundly sleeping. I don't feel good when he doesn't touch me, and I am not allowed to touch myself. I know that some nights I shouldn't fuss but I feel unwanted.

He tells me that isn't the case, but lately I feel like he doesn't want me.

He hasn't wanted to give me a bath, or read me books, or really bring up anything little like he used to.

I started crying and told him he hurt my feelings the other day and he just told me he did nothing wrong and ignored that I was sad.

I feel like I have to be happy all the time or I won't be taken care of, which is difficult for anyone, but especially because I'm Bipolar and currently unmedicated. ((

Anyone going through or have gone throughout similar stuff?!

[Antoinette]

Okay, first of all the most worrying thing about this whole thing is the fact that you said you're Bipolar but not taking medication. I'm stage 2 Bipolar and by no means am I forcing medication onto anybody but if you've been legitimately diagnosed by a doctor I'm sure they'd refer you to a counselor or at least suggest medication. Go speak to a professional about the options available ASAP.

Secondly, have you considered that he'd perhaps drained from work/life in general? Life is stressful. Do you work/study? I am assuming not because you say you can be little all day. Perhaps you need hobbies/friends/other things to do to keep yourself occupied and happy. You can't depend on your happiness from another person because then it's not really your happiness at all - it's theirs to dispose of at their will. Find and conquer your own happiness and then move on from there. 

 

Also, consider that his actions may be coming from a place of hurt on his end. Perhaps he feels too much pressure to constantly be 'daddy' and be the 'big' one and he just wants to relax. It can build up and really stress people out. You should talk to him about how he's feeling and how you feel and then together make a plan about what you can both do to overcome this. 

[Little Lily Pup]

I second Antionette. Just try to relax a bit and give him some space and time to destress.

[Aqu45]

It could be a stressful few days at work and it's frying him, maybe have dinner cooked when he comes home, have a hot bath ready and give him some pampering maybe a message but don't try to start any bedtime activities or he'll think you're not being sincere. Sometimes daddy's need some lovin and taking care of too

[Lil_pinkprincess]

I am legitimately diagnosed bipolar 2 with psychotic features. I tried medications and after changing it about four times in a short period of time, I Just stopped taking them and have kind of isolated myself since, I admit that I really don't know how well I would do with being medicated long term but i hated the side effects. I'm not completely against medication but i honestly feel so confused and overwhelmed at the process.

I probably am pretty demanding of my daddy, and I feel bad a lot that I am so needy.

I just don't know how to handle it all.

I do have hobbies and things that I do occupy my time, but my life literally does revolve around my daddy.

I don't drive, I don't really go anywhere without him, i don't have friends really especially ones I'm little around.

I know that I'm too much sometimes, but how can you stop being like that?

[Lil_pinkprincess]

I do try and take care of my daddy too, I give him massages, I give him baths, make his lunches and cook sometimes. Anything that I would like I try to do for him too.

I help him with his kids, and I genuinely do anything he asks. He's not very demanding or hard to please, I just ask for a lot I guess?

[EllaDawn]

I'm bipolar II with ADHD and severe anxiety. My relationship with Daddy was extremely strained before we found meds that work. It took some trial and error. I'm finally on meds that have me more or less stable and our relationship has improved by leaps and bounds - I'm also finding out I'm not nearly as needy as I was and as such, there is less pressure on him. What side effects were they that you didn't like?

 

Also, it sounds like you do a LOT for him, and you deserve your needs to be met too. If you are doing all of that and he is still dismissive of your needs, that is an issue. Is he using your mental illness as a way to sort of...dismiss any real unhappiness or hurts you might have? If so, even getting medicated may not change things at home, but it's something you may want to do for you. I found that when I was able to come at things from a more stable place, I was able to articulate my needs and stand up for myself much better, because Daddy had gotten sort of used to deflecting  a lot of my unhappiness or complaints as me being "crazy".

[Antoinette]

I am legitimately diagnosed bipolar 2 with psychotic features. I tried medications and after changing it about four times in a short period of time, I Just stopped taking them and have kind of isolated myself since, I admit that I really don't know how well I would do with being medicated long term but i hated the side effects. I'm not completely against medication but i honestly feel so confused and overwhelmed at the process.

I probably am pretty demanding of my daddy, and I feel bad a lot that I am so needy.

I just don't know how to handle it all.

I do have hobbies and things that I do occupy my time, but my life literally does revolve around my daddy.

I don't drive, I don't really go anywhere without him, i don't have friends really especially ones I'm little around.

I know that I'm too much sometimes, but how can you stop being like that?

 

Switching meds in a short period of time is never a good thing and it's even worse to completely stop taking meds as well. It takes a while for people to adjust to meds in the first place, so stopping them before they've had a chance to work is terrible.

Edited March 8, 2017 by xAntoinette

[Whispering-oak]

As a Daddy my thoughts are this... you must get your medical issues taken care of first. Your emotions play a big part in how you respond, view the world and your relationship...This may be a longer process than you would like, but it is most necessary to your health and well being. Keep a journal ... be honest in what you write down..if you like, keep dates and times and how you feel.. any questions you have for Daddy and any issues you have ... your welfare and Daddy's welfare, needs and desires, need to be met... as far as the sex/ touching self; the lack of release can build up explosive and damaging feelings .... talk to Daddy and suggest a compromise such as being able to take a bath during the day when he is at work and during the bath you are able to relieve some of the stress... this will help calm some of the tension... be honest and sincerely talk about feelings... hiding things can be destructive..

Good luck...

[glgkittykat99]

it is important that you make sure you take your meds and your daddy probably is just drained from work

you guys can try making compromises 

like allowing you to touch yourself but no cummies or maybe have bath times together and he can help you with shampooing your hair or something like that, quick little things/ moments that don't require anything too particular or too much effort but still comforts ur little side

doing stuff that have to be done daily like cooking or cleaning even brushing your teeth, try doing it together and it might help your littleness a bit 

if not, you should search for another little in your area maybe, that way you can communicate with someone who understands you and i guess have playdates and stuff

 

and if nothing then maybe just tell your daddy what you wrote (the topic) and just don't hide anything

[Cuddly Bumblebee]

Sounds that you are difficult company to your partner at this moment. I understand how it is to want nice things and attention, but maybe you are pushing it too much? Positivity and being satisfied comes from the inside, so sometimes changing our own attitudes isn't a bad advice with these issues. Give him a little space, make yourself as happy as possible, maybe he will come to you then? In every relationship it's normal to get a bit tired to another, feel moments of unhappiness or unwanted. And those times passes if you don't make it a big deal. Of course you have to have conversations and be open about your feelings. 

 

I hope you don't think that you have to be happy ALL the time, because that's just unrealistic. But the truth is, that it's hard to be close to someone who is unhappy and disappointed all the time. It's okay to make things hard and feel bad sometimes, we are just humans. Then we have to just get over it. So don't force things and enjoy what's good. And you don't have to do everything alone. Hopefully your partner supports you trough a difficult times. 

[Guest Princessaj]

Thanks for sharing and asking us for our feedback...

 

I made a commitment to myself that I would be the best of me I could be because I AFFECT OTHERS WITH MY MOODS, BEHAVIORS, ACTIONS....

 

I have a lifetime of bipolar 1 & 2 (Yes, I changed over time), major clinical depression, CPTSD (Complex PTSD), ADHD, Anxiety.....genetic from both parents...this is me, not an expert on anyone else.

 

To this day, my mental health carers (there have been many) are working with me to find a cocktail of meds that will take care of me.

 

To this day, medical science is not giving up on me, I won't give up on them.

 

My life takes a lifetime of mental health care. 

 

Take care of Daddy by taking care of yourself. All of yourself, Adult and little.

 

Think about.....

Working on your time management, organizing your day-parts of your day. 

 

Making appointments with yourself to do specific things that take care of specific things. 

 

Making a list of things you want to do with Daddy, specific things, outings, events...shopping is an event, then SCHEDULE THEM.

Help Daddy PLAN his energy to be the best for him, you, both of you.

 

Get out of yourself and give to others. VOLUNTEER!

 

I am very happy to brainstorm to help you try to put some of your lifestyle ideas into organized action.  Hugs