need help big time

[sayhall]

I am a middle/dom who love caring for littles but still needs cared for. Sadly I have a big problem, I make littles around me on kik groups uncomfortable by too whining and being sad too much. I try my best to fit in but no matter what I do I still.seem to be sad and eventually scare littles way.

Any advice for me?

[Guest]

So you are a switch. You prefer to be a Dom (I believe ?) I think the issue maybe most littles want a Dom to be strong and supporting their own emotional needs, but if someone is asking for emotional support from a little they probably get overwhelmed by it. From what I have seen (and sometimes am even guilty of it myself) when a Dom (or anyone really ) has long term depression /sadness /whinyness it's off putting. People want to be around others that are fun and make them feel good. I am not sure what the issue if that's making you sad so I can offer much advice there.

 

Regardless I hope you cheer up and make some worthwhile friends

[BigCityLittleGirl]

Not to sound rude but sometimes it's best to keep the sad stuff to your real friends that you know better than these random little. Remember, they are little haha immature and may not be capable of knowing how to console others or are looking to be consoled themselves. Try to come up with a new topic to talk about when you start feeling sad. And keep a personal journal too

[alotalittle]

Honestly, I don't think that this issue has much to do with being Dom/sub/switch or big/middle/little. I think the issue is that you feel sad often. Does this sadness impact other parts of your life? Friendships, work, sleep schedule, relationships, daily interactions, self image, etc? You might be suffering from depression or a different mental illness. If that's the case, then you might need help from an outside source (such as a doctor or therapist) or you might need to learn how to care for yourself better/learn better coping mechanisms. 

 

Having a partner in life (i.e. relationship) can help with sadness, but only if you've got a good foundation to help yourself as well. It's difficult to be with someone who puts their happiness completely in your hands. My ex suffered from major depression and some bipolar tendencies. I have mental illnesses as well and I tried very hard to be understanding. Ultimately, I couldn't handle knowing that no matter what I did, she could never feel happy. She refused to seek help and often put it all on me to solve her problems/make her feel better. Even though I don't think any of those actions towards me were intentional, it put so much pressure on me that I couldn't take it anymore.

 

Partners should be understanding (and try to be helpful) of mental illness, but they should never feel responsible for it. I work very hard to keep my mental illnesses under control and I'm constantly looking for new ways to improve myself and my mental health. My current partner is very aware of my mental illnesses and I try to keep him informed when they're acting up. Sometimes he can deal with it better than others. I never lose sight that they have an effect on him too. It's an effort for both of us (especially since he has his own mental battles as well), but it's very worth it.

 

Take some time to work on yourself and learn how to love yourself better I wish you the very best of luck