I need advice please.

[Guest pinklemonade]

 Me and my daddy have been together for a while in an LDR but he has never really been too hands on when it comes to punishment. He does like normal time outs etc, but like never really anything serious and has never neglected after care. Today, was different. I don't think I did anything too bad, I was just playing but he got really cross about me not taking him seriously. He wasn't being mean but his punishment really sucked, he made me hold out my arms and lift heavy things for like 5 minutes but he didn't say how long for so after a while naturally, my arms got tired. So, I gave up. I threw a little tantrum and stormed off. And now, he's super mad, he's demanding that I apologize for acting bratty, but I wasn't! My arms just hurt. Please help x

[BabyGirl32015]

What it sounds like to me (correct me if I'm wrong) is that you and your Care Giver need to work on your communication skills. Your CG might not be sure in themselves when it comes to punishments or maybe they feel that they do a good job, give them some feedback. When you DO give feedback I would suggest that you are out of Little Space and have an adult conversation with them, it may be hard but it will (hopefully) work wonders in the end.

 

Share a Smile!

BabbyGirl

[Guest pinklemonade]

thanks, we have been through it a lot but I sort of feel like he is just angry and being mean. I tried to explain that I was sad but he wasn't listening properly and I don't know how to explain it to him without making him angry or upset. It makes me even more sad because he seems to think I'm just being bratty .

[BabyGirl32015]

Again teh best thing to do is talk, but try a peace offering? Make him some cookies or curl up and tell him you love him. Those tricks always helped my last daddy wind down when he was irritated or thought i was being too bratty.

[Guest Cookiepie]

hey pinklemonade, 

 

I'm sorry you had to encounter that situation. I'm new on here but I had to leave a message because I feel like I have been in the same situation and I know that my mind went a little crazy. 

 

So I'm going to let know what I learnt from my experience, and I know that not all of this- or nothing I'm about you tell you may even apply to your situation. 

 

My daddy is super loving and has always been a little lenient with me, so it shocked me to my roots when he properly disciplined me. I got very emotional and kept questioning why he was being so irrational and mean. 

Things were bad for a few days and lots of talking happened. 

I was only concentrating on the good in my dynamic and I didn't want to accept my  punishment. My daddy wasn't being mean, he was being firm with me and I should have recognised that. Because I went on questioning him and became a little defensive, I was rude and disrespectful. There is a line between being bratty and challenging a daddy's authority-- and just being disrespectful. 

 

I love my daddy pie to bits and I know he would not be unfair to me and he has always respected my anxieties and worries, and yet I was so hurtful to him. 

 

The dynamic is so strong but because you loose the physical touch when in a LDR, you can't just hug your partner and it is very easy to walk away from a laptop without working things through properly. 

 

Communication is so important, understanding how your partner thinks and feel is so important. There could also be other things going on in your partner's life that are really affecting him. 

 

I'm so sorry for the long message. I'm not telling you that you are wrong, but maybe just consider some of things I have mentioned above. A good daddy only wants the best from you and as littles we have to be super strong. It is difficult to put that much trust in someone and sometimes we do have to give them a little hell just to see that cheeky smile on their face. 

 

<3 

[Guest QueenJellybean]

I think something to remember in relationships in general is that it is very rare that one person is all right and one person is all wrong. A relationship is a balancing act and arguments often transpire due to a series of little mistakes, or misjudgments of how someone feels/interprets what we say or do. I understand that you feel like your partner is "just angry and being mean", but perhaps the issue is that that's all you see it as. 

 

Asking your partner why they behaved the way they behaved, and genuinely listening with the intent to solve a problem rather than get a reason behind an action can help more than you know. It's just as important as talking it through. Be ready to step into your partner's shoes and understand what they are feeling and what part you play in that. 

 

Good luck!

[Guest pinklemonade]

Thank you ! It's all sorted now, I apologised for being a crybaby and he apologised for being a meanie butt xxx

[cuppycakes]

Thank you ! It's all sorted now, I apologised for being a crybaby and he apologised for being a meanie butt xxx

I'm glad to hear you two worked it out together I did want to mention that if you find it difficult to tell him something without your emotions getting the better of you, you can always try an email. I know it's worked for a lot of Littles on here!

[uhohbabygrl]

A punishment you guys should consider is the quiet game. Me and my daddy call it that. It's when you're in a public place but he calls you and talks sexy to you, but you have to be quiet. Or another could be you have to send certain kinds of pictures of yourself to him. Simple stuff like that.

[Guest pinklemonade]

A punishment you guys should consider is the quiet game. Me and my daddy call it that. It's when you're in a public place but he calls you and talks sexy to you, but you have to be quiet. Or another could be you have to send certain kinds of pictures of yourself to him. Simple stuff like that.

 

Haha, yeah that isn't really a punishment between me and daddy that's just normal. He can be a bit of a meanie butt when it comes to things like that but it's in a loving way so it works for both of us ! Xxxx thank you! Hehee xxxx