How to tell my husband?

[Guest ASerpent]

Where do you see me lying?

 

Actually I'm not lying at all. I found the ddlg thing while doing research on why I feel the way I do. There's one page in German language I found. That's the one I would like to share with him. When I give him the webpage and tell him that that's the way I feel - where is the lie? I can't show him this page or other pages on tumblr. He ain't a native speaker and his English ain't that good.

Edited February 12, 2017 by ASerpent

[mylittlesidewearsblack]

It's a lie through omission from my perspective, bc it sounded like you wanted to "accidentally" leave a page open and see how he felt about it instead of just being like hey, i found this cool thing, how about we give it a try? idk,you just seem super afraid and that makes me wonder what your relationship is like that you can't just share an interest with someone you love without being terrified of judgement.

[Guest GrumpyGeorge]

Actually no. I feel quite insecure about just saying it straight. I really don't know how to start it. Do you have any advice?

All you can do is be honest and upfront, tell him you like this, why you like this and how it makes you feel then explain to him how his involvement would make you feel and explain it's all about you both being comfortable.

 

Remember the rules and guidelines of a relationship come down to what you bith feel comfortable with and consent to.

[Guest ASerpent]

@mylittlesidewearsblack

 

You are right - I'm sort of afraid about his reaction. Maybe when you have been together for so long (16 years) things are sort of stuck. I kind of suppressed my needs for long and stepped back behind kids and everything. Standing up for your feelings and change a relationship dynamic that has been built up for years isn't always that easy.

Edited February 12, 2017 by ASerpent

[mylittlesidewearsblack]

@mylittlesidewearsblack

You are right - I'm sort of afraid about his reaction. Maybe when you have been together for so long (16 years) things are sort of stuck. I kind of suppressed my needs for long and stepped back behind kids and everything. Standing up for your feelings and change a relationship dynamic that has been built up for years isn't always that easy.

Daddy and i have been together for 12 years and we have only just started Ddlg but the one thing that we always do is to make sure th a each of us have an out if needed. Nothing has to be set in stone. Just cuz you want to try something doesn't mean you'll do it forever. We are doing this thing now and if it became uncomfortable or boring or whatever for either of us, or for sissy, then we stop. It's never too late to ask for something you want. And so long as he's not a flaming prick, the worst he can do is say no thanks, and if he is a prick, you've got bigger problems to tackle.

[Guest ASerpent]

Actually I think he might like it. Probably I'm just super insecure the thing is, that I'm completely confident about it when feeling little. But when going back to adult, feelings differ so much. I come to be insecure, afraid and sort of ashamed about being little and telling him. Tomorrow in the evening I'll be out. I thought I might tell him, that I will give him a website to take a look at while I'm gone. And that that's something I would really enjoy trying, bc I sort of identity with it. When I go like this he will have time on his own letting everything sink in and he has some alone time to think about it. Edited February 13, 2017 by ASerpent

[Guest ASerpent]

I think I might give it a go tonight. I intend to write him a WhatsApp with the website attached to it when I'm out tonight.

 

"Look at the attached website. You must actually read it completely, otherwise it probably makes no sense. I found that and I thought that would be something interesting, something new to explore. For me it sounds great, because I always get to like these things. I don't know if you like it, just have a look."

 

What do you think? Is that enough for a start?

Edited February 13, 2017 by ASerpent

[Tarquinious]

Hi to add value I would try the following,

1. Make him feel like the man allow him to decide all things ask his opinion and follow what he says.

2.you can buy coloring books for anxiety start with those.

3. Buy the sweet PJs.

4. Invite him for showers all the time or baths be playful.

5. Never say no in the bedroom however make him work for it like a game run from him in the house.

6. Every Daddy and Little relationship is different use his pet name and when he uses yours be more affectionate this is called positive reinforcement.

7. Always tell the truth if he loves you he will try.

 

Just a quick thought anyway

[Guest ASerpent]

Hi, thanx for advice. I already pretty much did the points 1. to 3. - that works pretty good I guess. That's why I was wondering to introduce him to the complete ddlg thing. I just didn't have the guts yet to send the massage

[Tarquinious]

Once you get to 6 and the role fits. Find a written article and omg i was reading and i found this its us.

By 6 you will know if he is happy and it will work.

[Tarquinious]

My little and I were living this role before we even knew it was a thing.

And i came across a article and then researched it fit.

All the best

[Tarquinious]

Also if he is keen and needs someone to help drop me a line.

[Tarquinious]

Also if he is keen and needs someone to help drop me a line.

[Guest ASerpent]

Do you think sending him the message I posted yesterday might work? Would it make sense to give it a go like that?