How to tell my husband?

[Guest ASerpent]

I am kind of unsure about how to tell my husband about my little side and that I would like to try some ddlg-thing. I thought I might write him a mail or something to get him into it. I am so insecure about what I should do

[Guest Little Ceci]

That depends! Are there instances in which he makes you feel little without realizing it?

 

Sit yourself down and draft up a list of any activities or interactions between yourself and your husband that have occurred that made you all small and wiggley. Let him know you enjoy those things and would like to explore that field a little more. Slow and steady, ease one another into it! Start off simple without the complications. 

[Guest ASerpent]

>> Are there instances in which he makes you feel little without realizing it? <<

 

I think so, yes. He says things like

 

"Only drink one mug of this tea."

"Walk over the grass, the street is frozen."

"Take my hand, so you don't fall on the frozen parts from the street."

 

Some examples I just recall from the last days.

 

I'm so unsure what to say. So he doesn't misunderstand me.

Edited January 13, 2017 by ASerpent

[ziva vlad's kitten]

A letter sounds like a good idea. If you don't talk about it at all he won't realize you want ddlg. It can be very scary to open up a new side of yourself to someone. I'm sure he married you for some reason, and I'm betting that reason is because he loves you. I bet he will love your little side too.

[Guest ASerpent]

I started kind of behaving more "little" when I feel like it. I think it might be an option to check his reactions out and at some point get him more involved. Maybe by letter, mail etc.

 

What do your think about that way?

 

We have kids, so we can't do it 24/7 anyway.

Edited January 13, 2017 by ASerpent

[ziva vlad's kitten]

That sounds like it could work. Usually the way that feels natural and most comfortable is a good place to start. Everybody does dd/lg in their own way. it needs to be unique and what feels right for you and husband just like how you have to do other things in your relationship the way that is right for the two of you, and not the way other peoples tell you too. It's good to ask for suggestions and good ideas but there's no one right way, the only right way is what makes you and yours happy and comfortable. Edited January 13, 2017 by ziva vlad's kitten

[Guest ASerpent]

Thank you so much for your comments:) it feels really good to share my thoughts here.

 

I have always turned down the "little side", but it doesn't feel right. Now I decided I would probably feel better when living it out. I made a start when I recently bought a new pyjama. I got something cute with rainbows on it and feel really good about that now. Further I got some really cuddly bathrobe with ears on the hood. It feels really good and I think my husband likes those pieces too. I showed him those things and he found it cute too (after looking puzzled for a moment ).

Edited January 13, 2017 by ASerpent

[Guest ASerpent]

I'm sort of confused right now. As I wrote, I was trying to introduce him slowly to things. I thought he was taking it good, but yesterday he said "You're kind of exhausting the last days." I'm afraid, it's not his piece of cake.

[Tiger_Corn]

Little doces at a time

[Guest ASerpent]

Thanx So you think I should take it really slow then? Maybe that would be an option, so he won't get overwhelmed by everything. Do you have any other advice for me Tiger_Corn?

[Tiger_Corn]

Just slower. Slow for you may not be SLOW for him. You may what day by day and he may need one day a week

[Guest ASerpent]

OK, thank you. I really appreciate advice I guess I will try it slower then.

[Tiger_Corn]

We're Littles we run off Energizer batteries an bounce off cotton candy.

[fluffydaddy82]

Me and my wife do it just be honest and I'm sure he will think and understand

[Guest ASerpent]

Thank you everybody for your suggestions

 

I think to tell him by mail soon would be a good way. So he can think about it and do a bit research on his own before we actually talk about it face to face.

 

I wonder, if anyone could give me an advice in how to explain the ddlg dynamic in a rather short, but yet precise and good way?

[Sparklefrosting]

I think the most important thing is doing your research and thinking about what being a little means to you and what you would want from a ddlg relationship. Start simple and explain to him that there's no pressure. 

 

I'm working on this same situation; I started by letting him know what a little was and that I shared those traits and now I'm working on writing an email about what a caregiver is, how our relationship compares, small steps we could take to building a more cgl relationship, and letting him know that it's fine to keep things as they are too. Once we've built a strong cgl relationship then I might bring up ddlg or ageplay if I think it's something we would both enjoy. 

 

Some people can bring up ddlg and have their partner accept it easily but if it seems like your partner is being overwhelmed by it, it's best to just introduce them to what you want in small amounts.

[Guest GrumpyGeorge]

Have you tried just talking to him? You'll be surprised how well most people handle and appreciate and adult conversation.

[Guest ASerpent]

Actually no. I feel quite insecure about just saying it straight. I really don't know how to start it. Do you have any advice? Edited February 10, 2017 by ASerpent

[Fairy Narwhal]

It sounds like you're looking for a certain answer and I don't believe there is one.

 

Just sit down and talk to him. There's no magical thing to say just tell him how you feel, how it's important to you and how you would like to try it.

 

Find a well written webpage and show him that. Then explain what you want in your own words.

 

Nothing is going to change unless you communicate.

 

.

I'm sort of confused right now. As I wrote, I was trying to introduce him slowly to things. I thought he was taking it good, but yesterday he said "You're kind of exhausting the last days." I'm afraid, it's not his piece of cake.

Assuming you know what's going through his head is just going to stress you out.

 

Nothing changes overnight but incorporating small things into your everyday life can be an easy way to slowly get into it.

 

Hope this helps and doesn't come off as rude. I just drive myself crazy assuming that I know what's going on inside my Daddy's head. Nine out of ten times, I'm wrong and overreacting and making stuff up in my head.

[Guest ASerpent]

The problem is, I'm just afraid of labeling it straight out to him. I keep thinking 'What if he thinks I'm nuts or something?'. So I thought pushing things into the direction would be OK for a start. Well, actually I already found an internet page that would be fine for introducing a few weeks ago and saved it. I just didn't have the guts yet to give him the link. I really want to, but something inside myself is blocking it I hope you know what I mean. Edited February 11, 2017 by ASerpent

[mylittlesidewearsblack]

It may be easier if you are interested in the submission aspect, bc that's not super outside of what most people can handle. But honestly i think just going for it is your best bet.

[Guest ASerpent]

I was just wondering, if I might just leave the webpage I found open and wait if he gets a hint from that. What do you think about that? Edited February 12, 2017 by ASerpent

[LittleGirlEmilia]

I agree with the above, try the submission/dominant thing with him first. Research things together. Ask his opinions/thoughts. It won't work if he doesn't seem interested.

[Guest ASerpent]

I thought when he sees the webpage he might get curious and read things over. I would still go for the sub/Dom aspect at the same time. I wondered, if he might put things together when he sees the webpage. Just wondering if that's a good idea.

 

Maybe I should tell him, that I found an interesting website I would like him to have a look at. I can send him the page and he can have a look at it himself and think things over.

Edited February 12, 2017 by ASerpent

[mylittlesidewearsblack]

Maybe but again, why not just talk about it? Why start off with a lie?