Do I have to?

[MilkyUsagi]

Hello everyone! I was thinking about my "daddy" and I never call him like that cause in Italian sounds to gross and I don't like it but... he doen't even know he acts like a daddy like..

 

✱He reads me bedtime stories

✱He gets me Toys

✱ I have a corner full of  coloring books and stuffies and disney stuff and he's ok with that 

✱I play silly and he likes it

✱ He spanks me a lot :°D everytime he sees me around doing stuff

✱ He talks to me like he's talking to a 8-10 year old girl

✱ He watches cartoons with me like timmy or curious George (he choosed curious George for me even if I didn't ask)

✱ He plays videogames with me like disney infinity or skylanders

✱ He keeps the stuff I make for him near the bed table

✱ before he goes to work and I'm sleeping he covers me better with sheets and I grab my plushie to sleep more ,w,

 

So... my main question is,.. Maybe we're not in to ddlg cause in that case we're vanilla but I'm a middle/little anyway and he's a daddy or caregiver? Halp Is it necessary to explain him his role? 

 

[PrincessClara]

I don't think it would hurt to talk to him about the dynamic, especially because he's already doing all the things anyway. Maybe he knows but doesn't want to spook you with the talk. Maybe he doesn't know but will like the dynamic since you guys are basically living the lifestyle anyway etc. Talking it out is always the best answer in my opinion 

[Princess-P]

Honestly labels mean absolutely nothing. Of your completely satisfied with your relationship then leave it as it is.

 

Of course if you want to talk to him then do it. Just bring it up and tell him there's no pressure and that you are happy. Maybe he will be receptive to it maybe not. But this sounds like a healthy relationship to me and a label won't change anything.

[MilkyUsagi]

Honestly labels mean absolutely nothing. Of your completely satisfied with your relationship then leave it as it is.

 

Of course if you want to talk to him then do it. Just bring it up and tell him there's no pressure and that you are happy. Maybe he will be receptive to it maybe not. But this sounds like a healthy relationship to me and a label won't change anything.

 

yeah I agree with you, at least it's just a label and maybe he would feel unconfortable with it and I want him to act normally as he's doing ;w;

[Guest Candy Minx ♡]

as Princess said, labels don't mean much. but if you like the titles and want to roll with

it, do so but it's always a helpful reminder that you can still be a little even if you explain

to him this dynamic and he doesn't want to go with it. always a healthy tidbit to 

remember.

 

but it's all up to you! princess is basically on point with her advice. 

[Thequeen]

I completely agree that titles don't mean much but one thing to keep in mind is they still do have power over your mind. It's one thing to act as a caregiver and little and its another to identify as it. Depending on his type of personality he may either like knowing other people are like you two, or it might scare him because now its not just his life how he wants and is okay with, it almost is like a rule book that he know would need to think about. Now he very much like to live said rule book but you need to think about him as a person and think about it. 

 

Good luck to you! Keep us posted! We all would love to hear how everything pan's out!

-TheQueen

[cuppycakes]

I agree with everyone else, I just wanted to add that I'm in a similar situation! I talked to my boy about the lifestyle a little. Mostly in passing, and I don't think he looked into it, but our relationship didn't change really.

 

However, if you want your relationship to change (ie. Have rules or punishments) then I think it would be in your best interest to talk to him. Just mention "Hey you know those things we do? There's a name for it!"

 

Take care ♡

[James.]

To add onto the points made above, if you want to give him a title, there are a whole bunch of things other than Daddy you could call him. A quick search will find threads in this forum and elsewhere about alternative names. It's hard without knowing the specifics of your relationship, but if you are interested in any aspects of ddlg that you are not doing now (Perhaps rules, punishments, rewards) then it might not be so bad to try talking to him about it. From what you describe, you still feel fulfilled and happy in your relationship, so if he wasn't at all interested in those things, it's not like you couldn't just do what you're doing now. Putting yourself out there in a situation like this can be scary sometimes, but it's generally best to be open with your partner and just work from there.

[MilkyUsagi]

To add onto the points made above, if you want to give him a title, there are a whole bunch of things other than Daddy you could call him. A quick search will find threads in this forum and elsewhere about alternative names. It's hard without knowing the specifics of your relationship, but if you are interested in any aspects of ddlg that you are not doing now (Perhaps rules, punishments, rewards) then it might not be so bad to try talking to him about it. From what you describe, you still feel fulfilled and happy in your relationship, so if he wasn't at all interested in those things, it's not like you couldn't just do what you're doing now. Putting yourself out there in a situation like this can be scary sometimes, but it's generally best to be open with your partner and just work from there.

 

Yes I'm actually pretty fine with this since I don't separate my little side with my adult side, they are only one thing so I don't go too deeply on the little side neither to the adult side... I mean, I act silly like a child and dress like a child but when needed I act and think like an adult, it's me 100% so if I have to act more childish I wouldn't feel real, sincere. I guess I'm ok with the stuff he does to me without asking more, so since I'm ok with that maybe there's no need to tell about the daddy/caregiver stuff , I would have done it just if I had other requests or I needed something more from him and since it's ok like that I will leave him do that without labels ù-ù yap I came to a conclusion, I wanted to share with you all my reasoning XD I guess it's very positive if he does it with a specific contract or discussions, right? I act like a little, so he acts instinctively like a daddy/caregiver 

 

 

I completely agree that titles don't mean much but one thing to keep in mind is they still do have power over your mind. It's one thing to act as a caregiver and little and its another to identify as it. Depending on his type of personality he may either like knowing other people are like you two, or it might scare him because now its not just his life how he wants and is okay with, it almost is like a rule book that he know would need to think about. Now he very much like to live said rule book but you need to think about him as a person and think about it. 

 

Good luck to you! Keep us posted! We all would love to hear how everything pan's out!

-TheQueen

 

I decided to not tell him but I choose Wolfie as a cute surname! cause I figure him as a Black Wolf  (I actually figure him more like a Dobermann but there's no nickname for that that sounds bigger)

 

 

I agree with everyone else, I just wanted to add that I'm in a similar situation! I talked to my boy about the lifestyle a little. Mostly in passing, and I don't think he looked into it, but our relationship didn't change really.

 

However, if you want your relationship to change (ie. Have rules or punishments) then I think it would be in your best interest to talk to him. Just mention "Hey you know those things we do? There's a name for it!"

 

Take care ♡

 

I think that our relationship wouldn't change because it would be like... "well we are a sort of CG/L and this happens.." and maybe he will say "well what I have to do more?" "nothing, it' ok like that" sooo it wouldn't change a thing so I don't want to intwertwine in my speeches XD or worse he would feel embarassed and stop doing that so I absolutely won't do that ;w; I will let him do what he feels and wants to do

[cuppycakes]

 I will let him do what he feels and wants to do

(I thought this sentence was super cute)

I'm glad you figured out what you're going to do! I do think that if this keeps nagging on you that you should tell him, then you probably should. (I'm a very big believer that if you feel something very strongly that you should do it if it's within reason) You don't wanot this to make you feel bad about yourself/your relationship/your SO!

 

On the flip side if you're totally comfortable not telling him, then never ever let it bug you. You're not hiding anything from him, you're just happy :3 stay happy. You two sound very cute together.

[MilkyUsagi]

(I thought this sentence was super cute)

I'm glad you figured out what you're going to do! I do think that if this keeps nagging on you that you should tell him, then you probably should. (I'm a very big believer that if you feel something very strongly that you should do it if it's within reason) You don't wanot this to make you feel bad about yourself/your relationship/your SO!

On the flip side if you're totally comfortable not telling him, then never ever let it bug you. You're not hiding anything from him, you're just happy :3 stay happy. You two sound very cute together.

thank youuu