Need help learning to be a daddy

[Yorham]

I recently about 3 months ago got into a relationship with a very loving little. She was extremely timid to tell me this as fear of rejection. But I was totally fine with it having a idea of what she was talking about.

 

Over the months she has been trying to teach me how to treat a little (I.e. the rules, limits, and so on) but she can't quite explain how to be a daddy. I love my little with all my heart and want to be the best daddy I can. But I can't quite grasp how to.

 

I do have experience taking care of actual children that are of my littles chosen age. But I can't quite translate that over properly. Simply because I can't at some times see her as a little.

 

I need advice from experienced daddy's on how to make rules, find limits, give appropriate punishments when needed, how to see my little as a little when she goes into little space... I guess just advice on everything I suppose. I just want to be the best daddy I can for her.

[Princess-P]

Being a "good Daddy" is subjective to every little. The only way you will be able to meet her needs is to ask her what her needs are. Every relationship is different. If rules and punishments are tripping you up keep in mind that you don't need them. I have no rules and that works for us. I don't get punished for anything either because we are equals.

 

But if rules is something you both desire remember that they are intended to help your little with things SHE wants to work on. And that punishments are something you both have to agree on yet should not be something she enjoys. For example if spankings are fun for her then they should not be a punishment as they won't curb the behavior you are both trying to change.

 

Sit down and talk to her, as an adult. She may be little but she's not an actual child and should be open to proper communication. Discuss what you both desire from a relationship. If it is indeed rules then make a physical list. Then discuss punishments. Write those down too. If its on paper it will be easier to follow. You will have a guide line that you can make reference to as needed. And as your relationship grows make adjustment's.

[Johnny Hammersticks]

Sounds like 3 months is a great foundation for you guys to build trust and communication into a DDLG relationship. Use your natural instincts as a caring nuturing human being. Reinforce positive behavior, like eating healthy and excercising, getting to bed at a time thats acceptable to you both. Making sure she maintains a healthy self image, and if she has a sweet tooth, make sure she asks permission before having sweets.

 

If she is only moderately sexual, then gently nudge her boundries with trust, communication, time and patience. If she is very very sexual, then maybe you can be as rough and sexually dominating as youd like.

 

Most of all be consistant in standing by YOUR convictions and values, many times littles want you to take the lead, so be creative, make it exciting and playful, and make sure she is having fun! Best of luck to you both.

[Lil_pinkprincess]

I think that it is wonderful that you want to be the best daddy to her!

I think that my Daddy started grasping everything better when I explained to him what him being my Daddy meant to me.

He is a natural caregiver and he is a father to children around my little age.

 

He knew that I needed more attention, and reassurance like a child but when I called him daddy I don't think he understood at first that it meant something so huge to me.

To me, him being my Daddy gave me validation and safety.

 

I crave my Daddy's attention, affection, and approval. Daddy takes care of me by making sure my emotional, physical and all other needs are met. But he also knows things that I desperately want like for him to put my paci in my mouth, and take my clothes off for me.

 

How do you not see her as little?

Could that be because you're comparing her to your children?

[Child Of Light]

Awww, this post is so great!

 

Being a "Good Daddy" means so much for so many different people. 

 

It's not a one-size-fits-all. Communication!!! Just talk it all over.... and having a healthy way to communicate (even for you) if something isn't Okay or either of you is uncomfortable there needs to be an open line to express that.Need to figure out what are "Green" (Okay things to do), "Yellow" (unsure) and "Red" (Hard Limits) on both of your ends. Some of those things might just happen by test and error. And again, communication will be needed as that goes along.

[Guest Appacheian]

I have to say that my relationship as my little's daddy is the most rewarding and fulfilling experience of my life. At the outset you must understand the massive responsibility you are accepting. You will become the centre of your littles world. You will guide, mentor, love, cherish, appreciate, be consistent, be mature, be strong,at times correct and punish if that is part of your dynamic. There is no true way no matter what anybody says. It is for you and your little to decide. There is no text book. I would suggest researching sites and forums together, and from all you read and discover then decide the path that bests suits you. Your relationship with your little will be unique and entirely your own making.