how did you discover you were a little?

[NiazKilam]

I guess for me, I've always been that way. I've always loved toys and teddys and I can remember going out shopping with my parents and always going to the toy isle and they would ask "aren't you a little to old for that?" And me ignoring them and what not. I haven't really told them or my friends I'm a little,but I think they could tell. How did you guys come into your "littleness"? If that's even a word. X3

[Guest Ginger]

I've always been childish. Coloring books, cartoons/children's movies, stuffies.... No one really questioned me about it. My best friend/sister knows about me but otherwise, everyone just assumes I'm kind of childish. I found out about this though about... two years ago? Three years ago? It's always just been an accepted part of me though since My current bf loves it too x3 so that's a huge bonus.

[MusicChicaMia]

Same for me Ginger. I've always been a child at heart, feeling like i was never meant to be an adult hahaha. When my ex (while we were dating) had brought up the idea to me and we actually started talking and i got to learn more about it, that's when i found out that it was the thing for me. It works perfectly with how my personality is and the best part is that I can be me and not have to worry about being clingy, needy or childish in this type of relationship. 

[Guest littlevulcangirl]

I had being saying "I need people to realise I'm a child inside" and feeling really bad about myself being immature and highly emotional and sensitive and stuff. For a long time. And about a year ago a therapist suggested getting in touch with my inner little girl. But I had difficulties doing that. I saw a thing someone wrote about being middle. Then I kinda got onto little and realised it wasn't what I thought it meant at all. I got brave and ordered a paci and when I tried it it felt so nice. And that was it I go into little space every day and it really helps me be happy and loved and stuff. The rest of the time I'm in middle space anyway I realised. I can be a grown up when needed but I don't think I'm very convincing hehe

[Guest LittleLexiKitty]

For me ive always been more little, ive always been the one to play wif toys or color or play wif stuffies while everyone was out drinking or doing other "adult" things. My friend even said it once telling me that i have "child eyes" meaning i see all the amazing things in the world that alot of people forgot about when growing up. I never knew about being "little" it was just kinda how i acted, learning about littles more just made it make sense to me.

[Guest ZenDD]

This is yet another opportunity to make this clear distinction: being a little in the DDlg context isn't just about toys and teddy bears. With all due respect to you, of course you can remember the interactions with your parents, which you mentioned in your post, because they only happened a short time ago as you are only 18.

 

I think your definition of a little has become quite common, but within the original concept of DDlg, though, it is not the same thing. The definition of a little in the DDlg concept, is someone who has lived as an adult, managing adult responsibilities, who feels a need to roleplay and/or regress to a child-like psychological state while consenting to take part in a D/s dynamic with another consenting adult who is in a Caregiver role.

 

The interest in coloring, children's movies, toys and stuffies is not what defines or designates a little. These things are tools/manipulatives to help facilitate the temporary shift from an adult psychological state to the child-like one, and to help maintain that altered state of consciousness for the desired duration. Just having an interest in these things, without the interest in manifesting a dynamic with a CG, is merely an interest in toys and stuffies. And someone who  moves directly from actual parents to having a DD/CG (and in some cases as I've seen here, while still having actual parents as CG's!) is not a little within the DDlg/CGl concept!

 

If someone is 17, lives at home, and doesn't pay their own bills, they are considered an adolescent child; not yet an adult. Turning 18 wouldn't automatically make that person an "adult" in actuality, only in the legal sense. This person, regardless of their age, would still not be capable of regressing or role-playing to a child-like psychology because it is the only one they have had. This is what is considered a child. A child can't be a little.

 

There is nothing wrong with people of any age having an interest in products/activities that are designed for children, but this interest alone does not make one a little. Nor does child-like or immature behavior. These are separate issues from a little as defined within the DDlg/CGl concept. This distinction is getting more and more lost and/or misunderstood everyday within this forum.

 

For any self-identified little out there who may be reading this; there is nothing wrong with you if you aren't interested in taking part in a D/s dynamic as a little, but if you are not interested in participating in a consensual, adult, D/s dynamic, please know you are not into DDlg/CGl. 

 

(edited for spelling)

Edited December 31, 2016 by ZenDD

[Bam Bam]

This is yet another opportunity to make this clear distinction: being a little in the DDlg context isn't just about toys and teddy bears. With all due respect to you, of course you can remember the interactions with your parents, which you mentioned in your post, because they only happened a short time ago as you are only 18.

 

I think your definition of a little has become quite common, but within the original concept of DDlg, though, it is not the same thing. The definition of a little in the DDlg concept, is someone who has lived as an adult, managing adult responsibilities, who feels a need to roleplay and/or regress to a child-like psychological state while consenting to take part in a D/s dynamic with another consenting adult who is in a Caregiver role.

 

The interest in coloring, children's movies, toys and stuffies is not what defines or designates a little. These things are tools/manipulatives to help facilitate the temporary shift from an adult psychological state to the child-like one, and to help maintain that altered state of consciousness for the desired duration. Just having an interest in these things, without the interest in manifesting a dynamic with a CG, is merely an interest in toys and stuffies. And someone who  moves directly from actual parents to having a DD/CG (and in some cases as I've seen here, while still having actual parents as CG's!) is not a little within the DDlg/CGl concept!

 

If someone is 17, lives at home, and doesn't pay their own bills, they are considered an adolescent child; not yet an adult. Turning 18 wouldn't automatically make that person an "adult" in actuality, only in the legal sense. This person, regardless of their age, would still not be capable of regressing or role-playing to a child-like psychology because it is the only one they have had. This is what is considered a child. A child can't be a little.

 

There is nothing wrong with people of any age having an interest in products/activities that are designed for children, but this interest alone does not make one a little. Nor does child-like or immature behavior. These are separate issues from a little as defined within the DDlg/CGl concept. This distinction is getting more and more lost and/or misunderstood everyday within this forum.

 

For any self-identified little out there who may be reading this; there is nothing wrong with you if you aren't interested in taking part in a D/s dynamic as a little, but if you are not interested in participating in a consensual, adult, D/s dynamic, please know you are not into DDlg/CGl. 

 

(edited for spelling)

Great thing about ddlg, there are many different types of littles and different types of caregivers. You act like your way is the only true way, which is entirely wrong. Just because it works for you doesn't mean it works for everybody else. We don't have an official rule book for ddlg.

Edited December 31, 2016 by Guest

[NiazKilam]

This is yet another opportunity to make this clear distinction: being a little in the DDlg context isn't just about toys and teddy bears. With all due respect to you, of course you can remember the interactions with your parents, which you mentioned in your post, because they only happened a short time ago as you are only 18.

 

I think your definition of a little has become quite common, but within the original concept of DDlg, though, it is not the same thing. The definition of a little in the DDlg concept, is someone who has lived as an adult, managing adult responsibilities, who feels a need to roleplay and/or regress to a child-like psychological state while consenting to take part in a D/s dynamic with another consenting adult who is in a Caregiver role.

 

The interest in coloring, children's movies, toys and stuffies is not what defines or designates a little. These things are tools/manipulatives to help facilitate the temporary shift from an adult psychological state to the child-like one, and to help maintain that altered state of consciousness for the desired duration. Just having an interest in these things, without the interest in manifesting a dynamic with a CG, is merely an interest in toys and stuffies. And someone who  moves directly from actual parents to having a DD/CG (and in some cases as I've seen here, while still having actual parents as CG's!) is not a little within the DDlg/CGl concept!

 

If someone is 17, lives at home, and doesn't pay their own bills, they are considered an adolescent child; not yet an adult. Turning 18 wouldn't automatically make that person an "adult" in actuality, only in the legal sense. This person, regardless of their age, would still not be capable of regressing or role-playing to a child-like psychology because it is the only one they have had. This is what is considered a child. A child can't be a little.

 

There is nothing wrong with people of any age having an interest in products/activities that are designed for children, but this interest alone does not make one a little. Nor does child-like or immature behavior. These are separate issues from a little as defined within the DDlg/CGl concept. This distinction is getting more and more lost and/or misunderstood everyday within this forum.

 

For any self-identified little out there who may be reading this; there is nothing wrong with you if you aren't interested in taking part in a D/s dynamic as a little, but if you are not interested in participating in a consensual, adult, D/s dynamic, please know you are not into DDlg/CGl. 

 

(edited for spelling)

Your entitled to your own way of thinking,but considering the fact that I'm 18,living on my on atm,working in the morning and taking night classes while paying bills out the ass,it's nice to run off into little space as it's a stress reliever from my adult life. But I understand what your saying though.

[littlemissoopsie]

I discovered through reading about it unintentionally. In my adult life I face a lot of pressure at work and my job comes with huge responsibilities and while I enjoy the work I do, and have no problem doing adult things such as paying bills, looking after the household, maintaining and growing in my relationship I could never find an outlet for myself. In my daily adult life I'm a caregiver and constantly have to put other people's needs before my own, and it's something that I have always been/done throughout my life (I had to raise my two younger brothers) and it is quite literally my job, so I guess somewhere a long the line I realised that I too needing taking care of.

[Guest ZenDD]

Great thing about ddlg, there are many different types of littles and different types of caregivers. You act like your way is the only true way, which is entirely wrong. Just because it works for you doesn't mean it works for everybody else. We don't have an official rule book for ddlg.

 

Thanks for your comment, I've had people imply this sentiment to me before, but those that do often misinterpret the actual point i'm trying to make, or I just may not be good at clarifying my point. I'll try again. I'm not actually putting much opinion in my comment here, i'm trying to use fact, based on semantics, terminology, science, and tradition.

 

Of course there are all kinds of littles and caregivers. You'll get no argument from me there. I appreciate your interest and your comment, but you're mistaken in assuming that i've defined what a little is, in general. I've specifically defined what a little is within the concept and context of DDlg. I didn't invent that definition: it's in the name. It's the counterpart of the Caregiver, which in DDlg specifically, is a Dominant Daddy. I didn't invent the name of the concept either. It's not "my way". I didn't even describe "my way", my personal interpretation, methods, or motivations, so i'm not sure what "way" you think I'm promoting. I'm reminding everyone that DDlg is between two consenting adults (at least two).

 

But most importantly, I defined what an "adult" is, and that a little, within the DDlg context specifically, has to be an adult. That isn't an opinion, that's a fact. BDSM is for adults. Children do not have the psychological understanding of what constitutes consent nor can they appreciate all of the consequences that come with it, and therefore, it is a dangerous practice not intended for them. Many of us adults even struggle with these concepts, for crying out loud!

 

Remember, being a little is one thing, being into DDlg is another. There are many littles here who are not into DDlg and it's D/s concepts. And that's okay to not be into DDlg if one is a little, but this place is called DDlg Forum, and i'm just reminding people of that. Thanks.

 

(edited for spelling)

Edited December 31, 2016 by ZenDD

[Bam Bam]

Thanks for your comment, I've had people imply this sentiment to me before, but those that do often misinterpret the actual point i'm trying to make, or I just may not be good at clarifying my point. I'll try again. I'm not actually putting much opinion in my comment here, i'm trying to use fact, based on semantics, terminology, science, and tradition.

 

Of course there are all kinds of littles and caregivers. You'll get no argument from me there. I appreciate your interest and your comment, but you're mistaken in assuming that i've defined what a little is, in general. I've specifically defined what a little is within the concept and context of DDlg. I didn't invent that definition: it's in the name. It's the counterpart of the Caregiver, which in DDlg specifically, is a Dominant Daddy. I didn't invent the name of the concept either. It's not "my way". I didn't even describe "my way", my personal interpretation, methods, or motivations, so i'm not sure what "way" you think I'm promoting. I'm reminding everyone that DDlg is between two consenting adults (at least two).

 

But most importantly, I defined what an "adult" is, and that a little, within the DDlg context specifically, has to be an adult. That isn't an opinion, that's a fact. BDSM is for adults. Children do not have the psychological understanding of what constitutes consent nor can they appreciate all of the consequences that come with it, and therefore, it is a dangerous practice not intended for them. Many of us adults even struggle with these concepts, for crying out loud!

 

Remember, being a little is one thing, being into DDlg is another. There are many littles here who are not into DDlg and it's D/s concepts. And that's okay to not be into DDlg if one is a little, but this place is called DDlg Forum, and i'm just reminding people of that. Thanks.

 

(edited for spelling)

According to the name of DD/lg (DaddyDom/littlegirl), the only people who should be on this website should Daddies and little girls. Mommy doms, little boys, switches, or even middles should not be here. Let's not forget that DDlg is a branch of CG/l which it doesn't mention that caregivers have to be doms or littles have to be a sub. 

[Guest ZenDD]

Your entitled to your own way of thinking,but considering the fact that I'm 18,living on my on atm,working in the morning and taking night classes while paying bills out the ass,it's nice to run off into little space as it's a stress reliever from my adult life. But I understand what your saying though.

 

You are most definitely an adult then, and i'm glad, because there are too many littles here who aren't. Again, it isn't the biological age that defines a little, it is the psychology. But what is not my "way of thinking" and is actually scientific logic is my previous comment stating that:

 

"...being a little in the DDlg context isn't just about toys and teddy bears."

 

"The interest in coloring, children's movies, toys and stuffies is not what defines or designates a little. These things are tools/manipulatives to help facilitate the temporary shift from an adult psychological state to the child-like one, and to help maintain that altered state of consciousness for the desired duration. Just having an interest in these things, without the interest in manifesting a dynamic with a CG, is merely an interest in toys and stuffies."

 

Again, this definition of a little which i am using is specifically within the context of DDlg. Some "littles" are not into DDlg, they only like acting child-like, taking part in child-like activities, and playing with toys and stuffies, without being involved in a D/s dynamic with a Caregiver. These are a different kind of "little" and there are many of those here, making this place a bit convoluted and confusing since this is a DDlg forum. There are non-DDlg littles here, and DDlg littles here. Many have gotten confused, therefore, on what the difference is.

[Guest ZenDD]

According to the name of DD/lg (DaddyDom/littlegirl), the only people who should be on this website should Daddies and little girls. Mommy doms, little boys, switches, or even middles should not be here. Let's not forget that DDlg is a branch of CG/l which it doesn't mention that caregivers have to be doms or littles have to be a sub. 

 

Ok, let's not go overboard though, because I never said that there aren't other kinds of CG's. In my original response, and in nearly all of my responses on this forum, I use "DDlg/CGl" numerous times as the terminology to describe the concept. So please don't try to imply that I only believe that Dominant Daddies are the only type of Caregiver.

 

You're missing the point, which is that DDlg/CGl are terms describing the the D/s dynamic between at least two consenting adults. And yes, even the term CGl implies D/s as the dynamic because it utilizes counterpoint in the very concept: Caregiver and little. Those are two opposing/balancing roles, which is what M/s and D/s are all about. True that the CG could be a sub and that the little could be a Dom, but if you look at even the way the terminology is notated you get an indication of the traditional interpretation, or at very least that there is a D/s dynamic: "CG" is capitalized, "l" is lower-case. "DD" is capitalized, "lg" is lower case. Even you pay attention to this detail in your comments.

 

In BDSM semantics and attention to detail, the case of letters is often used to indicate the Dominant and submissive player. For example, if a Caregiver and little were without a D/s dynamic, or maybe switch, then adherents who paid attention to detail would notate that as "CGL." If the caregiver were always the sub then, "cgL." Same with DDlg, where switches may notate their relationship with DDLG, or if the daddy were a sub then it would be LGsd (or LGds). This may seem trivial to some, but again, BDSM has a tradition with detailed semantics in order to be clear about it's concepts, motivations, and participants. It's part of BDSM's commitment to SSC; Safe-Sane-Consensual participation. If even the coding of acronyms and lexicon within BDSM is given this much detail, then you can see why it's important to address what DDlg/CGl is and means, and what "little" means. Serious practitioners and adherents of BDSM (all of its branches) take pride in precision. It's part of the tradition. And traditions are important to healthy communities. 

 

The point is that D/s within DDlg/CGl is undeniable and is actually the traditional norm. It doesn't mean there aren't variants, but it doesn't make sense to criticize me for being part of the traditional norm and for reminding people of that (and maybe even enlightening some newcomers about it). I don't look at evolution and change negatively, but I do look at a dismissal of traditional form, and a dismissal of those who follow the traditional form, as negative. Maybe that makes me defensive, but I think knowing where things come from is important, and it shows respect when one is interested in evolving and creating new traditions. Thanks again, Bam Bam. Take care.

 

(edited for spelling)

Edited December 31, 2016 by ZenDD

[Guest littlevulcangirl]

ZenDD, I kinda find your comments off-topic really. The thread is about sharing stories of Littleness and self-discovery and you've inserted a bunch of passive aggressive policing of our own identities. Like, please don't. This forum is clearly stated to be for all flavours of the 'lifestyle' and you're exploration of the minutiae of one particular angle on this thread is just overbearing and obnoxious.

[DaddysMonkey]

Hello there ! 

 

I would like to start off by saying that I personally feel that Zen's words are being skewed and/or interpreted in a way that is inappropriate , and turned into something he clearly did not mean. Maybe it is just me , but I understand his point crystal clear and agree with him 100%. I have found Zen to be harsh , perhaps , before but he has never stated "his way or the highway" in any of the replies I have read of his.

 

Now that I have said that , I have to say that you can very much so be 18 years old and be an adult , paying bills , making your own rules for your life. You can also be 40 years old , living in your mother's basement , having her cook you dinner every night. 18 and above , your age is irrelevant. What matters , is your "psychological age" and maturity and your ability to take care of yourself like the actual description of adult says you should.

 

The D/s culture DOES go way back , and there are no "rule books" for it. BUT , there are obviously guidelines and traditions , ect , that should be respected. Anyone who has done research can tell you this , and will also tell you they are not "rules" that come from mysterious rule book people like to bring up when they are offended in some way. 

 

Being in a Dd/lg relationship , I am a little first and foremost but am and always will be submissive. This is why it is termed Daddy Dom. As you can see , the first D I have capitalized , but the second d for Dd is not. This is because in my case , my Daddy is a Daddy first , and a dom second. 

 

There are Daddys out there who are just that. Daddys/Caregivers , who have no interest in BDSM style Domination. 

 

This is all fine and dandy , be whatever little you want to be , be whatever Daddy or Dom you wish to be , all within respects to the foundation of BDSM and D/s DD/lg traditions and culture. 

 

I agree and find it discerning when "littles" have never had a job before , have never provided themselves with a home of their own , paid their own bills , live at home with their parents and are provided everything in life that a child is provided ... then you are still a child. Like the saying goes.. if it walks like a duck , looks like a duck , and quacks like a duck... it is most likely a duck. 

 

Thank you for listening and hope this helps. 

Edited December 31, 2016 by Daddysmonkey

[Daddy's_Babygirl]

-pops in briefly-

 

Frankly, i think Zen is.... blunt, opinionated (though often based on facts), and extremely straight forward. I think because of this he is often misinterpreted. I truthfully do not think that he means any harm to anyone... I truthfully think he follows many of the traditional DDlg concepts and attempts to educate others. Many of us here, frankly, don't follow these concepts and get offended when he states his opinions (which again, are based on facts).

 

Frankly, I don't agree with the way Zen words many things, though I understand what he means by them. Let me say this... the very first reply I had on this board was from Zen basically telling me that he didn't feel I followed DDlg. That I wasn't a true adherent. I have every right to be upset with what he says. But I'm not.

 

Truthfully, I probably am not "a true adherent" in the sense of his defenition. It's his right to feel that way, and frankly many of us here are attacking and twisting his words every time he posts, and I frankly get tired of it. I think I get more tired of the constant nagging of him than his posts and the nerve they strike with me.

 

-runs off again-

[NiazKilam]

I understand everyone's point,especially about the psychological side of DDlg as well as the Dd as well. Trust me I really do. x3 I feel bad cause I feel like I just caused a minature uproar. :/

[littlemissoopsie]

Honestly Zen was one of the people who replied to me first also, I haven't taken any offence at all. I'm at the beginning of my journey so I find all information useful. I love to research so I can see the point of explaining the origin of DD/lg if you like. Of course these things are always open to interpretation and exploration but I fully appreciate bluntness sometimes, for me it makes it easier to make sense of things if they are put bluntly.

 

@NiazKilam don't feel bad at all, I for one love a good debate and reading your post and writing my own first reply actually helped me realise a little more about myself.

[DaddysMonkey]

I understand everyone's point,especially about the psychological side of DDlg as well as the Dd as well. Trust me I really do. x3 I feel bad cause I feel like I just caused a minature uproar. :/

Please , do not feel bad. I have posted a thread before and refused to respond to it because of the debate it cause.

 

I hope nobody is hurt , and can take everything said with a grain of salt as your life is your life in the end. <3

[Guest]

For me, one of my friends told me about it, and the more I looked into it the more I was like wow this seems like the kind of life style/ relationship I have always wanted. I feel really happy being able to be little and let lose. Coloring and watching cartoons relaxes me and helps me feel more little. I have not been into this very long at all but it truely makes me much happier over all now that I have found it . (I was into kitten play before I found out about ddlg and for me they go hand and hand)

[Guest littlevulcangirl]

I'm similar with being a kitten, it kinda led me on to little aswell. And it's still part of who I am

[madhattersangel]

I actually only found out yesterday. I had never heard of dd/lg before, but once I'd looked it up... just wow. It was everything I wanted in a relationship already, and I just didn't know there was a name for it.

[splendabae]

it all started with memes. true story.

[lilbug]

I've been little for a long time, but I've only recently found the tittle "little".

I loved Disney, kids music, coloring, stuffies and little things since forever. And I've always end up being the baby of my friend group so I'd have several "friend mommies" that takes care of me until I met my daddy.

[suga]

honestly, i've always been like this.

 

i've had stuffies and hello kitty themed blankets and all that (do you like)jazz for as long as i can remember. i've always acted way younger than my same-age friends and they point it out often, but it's so normal for me now that i can practically act little in public or at school and won't get any looks from people that know me even as a senior. it's actually pretty dang convenient.

 

i only recently (maybe half a year ago) found out why i was so different through fan fictions actually.

Edited January 3, 2017 by suga