Should i give up on finding daddy?

[Burrito]

i have huge daddy issues, i realized that when i was 19 (now 22) and i'm only attracted to older guys about 35 yrs old or above.  However i find it's really difficult to meet one who is not married and appeared as a dominant from the place where i live... i've tried finding daddy online, but i guess online relationship doesn't really work well on me.  Should i just give up being a little and find a "boyfriend" instead...?  i really want a daddy but i feel terrible being alone  Do any of you have the same experience?

Edited December 12, 2016 by Burrito

[~Wini~]

i have huge daddy issues, i realized that when i was 19 (now 22) and i'm only attracted to older guys about 35 yrs old or above.  However i find it's really difficult to meet one who is not married and appeared as a dominant from the place where i live... i've tried finding daddy online, but i guess online relationship doesn't really work well on me.  Should i just give up being a little and find a "boyfriend" instead...?  i really want a daddy but i feel terrible being alone  Do any of you have the same experience?

 

You should try to work through your daddy issues before you go seeking a Daddy Dom. The issues will still be there with or without a partner if you don't work on them now, and those same issues will manifest in your relationships and cause problems. 

[Guest sissikitten]

I don't think you should gove up, just keep on trying! You will find someone eventually, you have lots of time. I'm also attracted to much older men, so I understand what you mean :x

[Einstien2]

My suggestion would be to find a boyfriend that you enjoy being with and love and then introduce him to what you are into.

[MoDaddy]

Keep looking. I'm sure you will find what your looking for eventually! 

[Burrito]

You should try to work through your daddy issues before you go seeking a Daddy Dom. The issues will still be there with or without a partner if you don't work on them now, and those same issues will manifest in your relationships and cause problems. 

 

I tried.  I had seen therapist before, not exactly because of my daddy issues, but some related problems, yet "daddy issues" still stick with me...

[Burrito]

I don't think you should gove up, just keep on trying! You will find someone eventually, you have lots of time. I'm also attracted to much older men, so I understand what you mean :x

 

Thank you for understanding, sissikitten! xoxo!  Just that my friends are mostly having a relationship and they keep recommending me guys around my age... this just makes me feel more lonely when people around don't understand me. 

[Burrito]

My suggestion would be to find a boyfriend that you enjoy being with and love and then introduce him to what you are into.

 

I thought about that, but what if he thinks that i'm a weirdo... i guess i'll just have to take that risk... 

[Burrito]

Keep looking. I'm sure you will find what your looking for eventually! 

 

*huuuugs*

[Guest OverDaddy'sKnee]

Don't give up. Once you find the right Daddy, the frustration and long wait you had to go through will be more than worth it.

[Pii]

Don't give up. You'll find the right Daddy for you eventually, because out there, there's the right person for everyone! Keep looking and you'll find your perfect Daddy!

[TinyTwaddle]

Don't give up! There is a perfect Daddy out there looking for you and if you give up he won't be able to find you. It's always hard when you're a little and looking because no one seems to be perfect enough. But he's out there... he just got lost on the way. Good Luck!!

[Einstien2]

I thought about that, but what if he thinks that i'm a weirdo... i guess i'll just have to take that risk...

That is a risk however you can do it slowly as you get to know them and it won't be such a shock. Sometimes the biggest risk is the one you didn't take

[Guest Dodgegirl97]

I've been thinking the same thing. I used online dating and just keep getting crushed. I hate being alone but I can't find someone close, honest, and single.

[LoralieHaze]

I'm almost 27, and for a few years now, I've found that I'm only attracted to men over 40. I know that's probably weird, or even wrong, to some people but it's just how I am and I can't really do anything to change it (nor do I want to ). I have my reasons and it works for me so I don't see it as a problem.

 

However, girls like us should be extra cautious. I'm not saying that older men are automatically more predatory than younger ones but some of them do purposely seek out younger women because they see us as weak, vulnerable, inexperienced, and therefore think that we can easily be manipulated. We need to be able to recognize the warning signs of this and not allow anyone to view us as inferior based on our age or lack of life experience.

 

Age issue aside, I don't think you should give up looking for a Daddy, though I do think you shouldn't spend too much time or energy on looking either. Personally, I found the perfect Daddy for me soon after I stopped worrying about if I was ever going to find one or not. If you're meant to be with someone, the two if you will naturally find each other and things will fall into place. Please focus first and foremost on learning, growing, maturing, and just bettering yourself in general. You want to be the best version of you, not only for the right Daddy, but for yourself as well.

[PapaMax]

My ex was 15 years younger than me and honestly we had a blast, I got on with her friends she got on with mine, there wasn't really anything I found that she wanted to do that I couldn't do any more because I was that bit older.. it really wasn't an issue and I don't think the age difference was the reason the relationship ended.

[Guest sissikitten]

Thank you for understanding, sissikitten! xoxo!  Just that my friends are mostly having a relationship and they keep recommending me guys around my age... this just makes me feel more lonely when people around don't understand me.

 

I have exactly the same problem! It's very annoying. Try to ignore it though, there is no other way I think.

[Moonwolf]

I notice several comments about Daddy being single. May I ask why that seems to be a requisite?

[Princess-P]

There's nothing wrong with being attracted to older men. My Daddy is almost 41, I just turned 28, and started dating 9 years ago.

 

The thing with an age gap if that's what your attracted Toni's making sure that you can both be on each others level. An older man may be interested in you for fun and sex but can you be mature enough to meet with his friends or family? Are you educated in his interests? Its a generation gap so that can be a huge problem.

 

Also if he's not able to relate to you in more that an fun sexual level then he will be bored. Or irritated. You'll be a pass time rather than a commitment. And you will be unhappy that he doesn't share and common ground with you.

 

Its a lot to think about. But that doesn't mean hope is lost. Try regular dating sites. Meet someone outside of the CG/l community. Find someone you share interests with and who you connect with and then introduce Them to CG/l. Don't wait too long. But don't rush it. You don't want to intimidate someone with so much information right away but don't also want to invest too much time into someone who can't give you what your looking for.

[Princess-P]

I notice several comments about Daddy being single. May I ask why that seems to be a requisite?

Most people unless they are Polly would prefer to be in a relationship with someone who isn't involved with someone else.

Edited December 12, 2016 by Princess-P

[Daisies&Donuts]

Not to put words into Burrito's mouth, but s/he seems to want a committed relationship, not just a Dom. This is fairly common. 

 

"Daddy issues", and any other personal issues, are going to have an effect on any relationship, especially romantic ones. You've added several layers of difficulty onto this by being attracted to older men and by being kinky. It is by no means impossible, but you are asking for a lot. Keep asking for a lot, if that is what you need. But also remember to give yourself time to find what it is you're looking for.

 

You may be surprised to find that you really click with guys your age, and they may be more than happy to take on the roll of Daddy, if you take your time easing them into the lifestyle. I find that a lot of people will be open to new experiences with their partner once they have a well established relationship with that partner. You might also try just dating vanilla guys who are older - they might be open to kink as well, as time goes on. Most older guys are going to expect you to have a certain level of maturity, so if you are little all the time, it may be a turnoff for them. Just something to keep in mind. That being said, my best relationships have been with guys who are at least 15 years older than me, so it isn't like you are asking the impossible. You just have to find the right person for you. It also does not hurt to date people just to learn about yourself and how you relate to people. You can date a lot of people and not have long-term relationships with them. You don't have to have sex with a lot of people just because you date a lot of people, but you can if you want and it might teach you about yourself. 

. 

 

Ultimately, my advice to you is to learn about yourself as much as you can. If you don't know yourself, you won't be able to understand your partner. If you want to date, date. Someone doesn't have to be your perfect Prince Charming or your lifelong partner to be worth dating. If Prince Charming does come along, that's great. But until then, it isn't a crime to kiss a few frogs and see what happens, if you want to.

[Moonwolf]

And a Poly Little is the unicorn of the DD/lg world?

[Daddy's_Babygirl]

I notice several comments about Daddy being single. May I ask why that seems to be a requisite?

I didn't notice these comments... and even looking back through I still don't see them.

[Moonwolf]

Burrito says something along those lines in her opening post.

[Burrito]

I've been thinking the same thing. I used online dating and just keep getting crushed. I hate being alone but I can't find someone close, honest, and single.

 

*sending virtual huuugs*