Research to help a collge student learn

[Guest CollegeStudent0008]

just a college student looking for some help figuring out all of the dd/lg stuff so i can write a paper. I appreciate any help.

You dont have to anwser all the questions but some would be great

1. What made you interested in DD/lg
2. What does being a little or daddy mean to you?
3. What does your daily routine consist of?
4. Do you have a daddy and/or little?
5. how much of your relationship is sexual?
6. How does this effect you interaction with your family, friends and society in general?

 

 

 

Note: I'm doing this because i think the community is fascinating. I do not think of it as a mental illness and I would never intentionally shame someone for their sexual interests. I want to learn more about this so that one day when i become a psychologist i can actually tell people about the community and what it really means to want this relationship. I want to put this into a better light and make sure that people know that this isn't all of the negative crap.

Edited December 7, 2016 by CollegeStudent0008

[Harley_Quinn]

1) I'm not sure lol

2) being a little... What does it mean... That's a good question. I have a hard time explaining it. I enjoy having a childlike wonder with everything and my daddy gets very happy when I'm excited over stuffed animals or pacis or new cartoons

3) daily routine: work then I stay home and watch YouTube waiting for daddy

4)yes I have a daddy

5)our relationship originally started sexual. We went to non sexual for a very long time. It's sorta a inbetween thing.

6) my family thinks I'm immature. And where I live it's pretty unusual to be able to be me so it's affects me greatly to not be able to wear my collar or wear little clothes.

 

Good luck on the paper!

[Robshik]

1. What made you interested in DD/lg

A Video about DD/LG and it was like, I want that too. It was something that I was searching for... Maybe a stupid Answer

2. What does being a little or daddy mean to you?

Im a Daddy, im protecting my little One, he/she can be let loose and be just herself. Its like my Child, if it had a bad day? I try too cheer him/her up.

3. What does your daily routine consist of?

Work and Talk

4. Do you have a daddy and/or little?

I have no little One but im a Uncle ^.^

5. how much of your relationship is sexual?

I have no relationship, its for me not needed but if we both want it. It is okay

6. How does this effect you interaction with your family, friends and society in general?

Not at all ^.^

[Guest CaregiverCarlos]

Nice, this is perfect!

 

So for number one, there wasn't really a specific reason to be interested in it. I stumbled upon it with my ex since she was interested in it, and fell in love with the lifestyle. It was like something I was missing but hadn't known it yet. Now what interests me after living the lifestyle is caring for, loving and spoiling a little/pet and helping them grow, as well as receiving that love and caring as well.

 

For number two, being a daddy means to be a little's caretaker and their best friend. You have to be able to know what's wrong for them, what makes them happy, when to be silly or firm. You also have the be the one they can trust. If your little can't trust you, who are they supposed to trust? 

 

For number three, I don't actually have a little right now, and daily routines can vary between LDR and IRL relationships. The relationship I had was a 24/7 one, so it started as soon as I woke up. It'd be to get up and make sure I wasn't tired and take care of my hygiene. Then depending on what time it was, go to wake the little, or if I was feeling particularly happy that morning, make her breakfast, like pancakes or something. Then when she's awake and ready to start the day, have her take care of her hygiene, and when she took meds in the morning, have her take them with her breakfast. Then the day would sometimes go to her, or sometimes go to things she needed to do. Like if she wasn't going to an appointment or needed to go shopping, then she'd be able to color or play games, or be a puppy (she was a pet as well) with snacks. Then lunch and repeat. Once she's had dinner and it'd gotten late, try to either wrangle her to the bathroom for a shower if she didn't take one in the morning, or get her to wind down for sleep. (the little I was with did NOT like bedtimes) Then after she's asleep, either clean up any mess that wasn't cleaned already or go to bed.

 

For number four, see question three answer.

 

For number five, well it was sexual at first, and to some extent still was towards the end, but it doesn't have to be. It really just depends on the little.

 

For number six... Well I can say my family doesn't know anything about me being part of this. Friends are kinda in on it, but they don't really ask, and kinda joke about it sometimes with things they've heard from like tumblr or from pictures they've seen on ifunny. But it doesn't really effect anything like that for me at least.

 

Well that about sums it up, if you still have questions feel free to ask more!

[Wandering sleeper]

Hi!

1: I first was interested in DD/LG because I was introduced by a S.O. He knew that I liked my Disney movies and cozy pajamas and liked being a kid forever and ever. It was a slippery slope, once I tried it, I became hooked. There's nothing better then giving up control when you find yourself being the boss all the time to let someone else  make the shots. It helps because I can never let anyone else take charge in my normal life because they lead life into disaster. I became interested when I learned it doesn't need to be public, it's my personal corner of the world. I can invite only who I trust to my play time, and I can have my stuffies and my dresses and my everything. To have someone who can look at me and tell me what I need to hear, and someone willing to discipline me and remind me to mind my manners in a way that's so caring and serious at times, it makes me feel like I can handle the world, one chunk at a time.

 

2:Being a little means being youthful, being fun and silly and natural to who I am. To respect my caregiver, even if I push his or her buttons some times when I'm feeling devious. Knowing when to stop, obey, listen. There's something really wonderful about giving complete obedience to a man or woman who chooses to be your care giver. You have absolute trust in them, when you have your play time together, if it includes sexual activities, you need that trust because at times it can get uncomfortable. You will feel your limits being pushed, and the thing that keeps you from feeling scared is trust. You have this fluffy and wonderful feeling in your tummy when you give that unwavering trust, you're told to do something and when you can no longer handle it, you use a safeword, a kind of code that you know is going to make it stop- then it does. A caregiver is to protect you, spoil you, teach you, provide in ways that you can't. Help you and love you, accept you in all the ways you hate yourself. They make you see the value in yourself, not for their benefit, but yours, so when you see that fat roll or you have an extra slice of pizza or can't remember what you were about to do, you know it's okay and life can and will go on. When you think you want to breakdown and cry, you have those arms to crawl into.

 

3: My daily routine doesn't include much ddlg much right now, but even alone as I mostly am, I live my life in between. I have a fleece onsie that I bought at Target, my hair goes into 2 pony tails, I watch my Disney and play my kid games. I look to my friend who is a Caregiver, he stands in for me some times and helps me remember things, to feel loved and to feel like I have a use. I go into "little space" where I want juice, my onsie, my movies, a different tone of speaking. I work 2 jobs, sleep very little and live an otherwise very lonely life, I don't make friends easily though I don't share these interests with friends I do make.

 

4:I have a substitute daddy, he lives far far away and I never  get to see him.

 

5: When I'm in little space, I don't engage in sexual activities. I use it as a way to relax, unwind, feel myself. Some of the terms of endearment may be used still outside of Age play, such as princess, baby girl, daddy, littleone.

 

6: Being a little makes it hard to date, finding some one who is okay with watching only kids movies mostly, me in my outfits, me wanting to be dominated and using terms I would cringe at in other times. It makes it hard for my family interactions when they can't understand my games, movie collections, dozens of stuffies. With friends, sometimes fighting the urge to say "daddy" when referring to that special someone. When you tend to be attracted to men twice your age. Never wanting to talk to anyone about personal life because of those issues. Making it hard to go out in public with some one so much your senior and be affectionate.

Edited December 7, 2016 by Wandering sleeper

[daddies_velvet_kitty]

Hi, I don't mean for you to look at this and think I'm being rude. That's exactly what I hope won't happen, but I'm not sure ddlg is good topic to write a paper on. There's a lot of misconceptions, a lot of people who don't see it the way the people in this community see it. Ddlg and most media, (tv, articles, etc) don't put ddlg in good light and when they do the (tv program, article etc) is criticized heavily. I'm sure there are some circumstances where this might be a good topic, I'm just trying to warn you of what might happen if you present what normally people see as a kink in everyday life. And if you do choose this topic to write your paper on remember that this is a lifestyle and the people in this lifestyle are regular, normal people too. Now just as a precaution (because someone in my psychology class did this) if you are portraying ddlg as a mental disability or in a negative light I kindly and strongly suggest you leave this website as everyone on here is very passionate about ddlg and try their hardest to get rid of these misconceptions about it. But if thats not your intent then please disregard that last sentence, everyone here is very friendly to people learning about this lifestyle

Edited December 7, 2016 by daddies_velvet_kitty

[Guest CollegeStudent0008]

So who engages in sexual activities using their little/daddy roles?

 

[Antoinette]

1) What made you interested in DD/lg

 

I've always been submissive by nature, but at the same time I've always been childlike and bratty - so for a while I was a frustrating slave (for a master who was extremely kind and patient), I enjoyed being a slave but at the same time I felt something was missing. I stumbled upon DD/lg by chance and well... It was like stumbling upon something that finally made sense.

 

2) What does being a little or a daddy mean to you?

 

Being a little means the world to me, to put it simply. It means I have a way of regressing and relaxing, I have a way to free the inner childlike emotions that I so often have to suppress from being 'too mature', it means I finally get to relive the childhood I never had.

 

3) What does your daily routine consist of? 

 

7:30 AM - I wake up, check my phone/message my daddy and tick off some tasks from OurHome

7:40 AM- I get ready for school and then go downstairs to eat my breakfast of toast and tea (all vegan, of course) 

7:50 AM - I brush my teethsies and do my hair

8:00 AM - I leave for school, catching a bus. 

9:00 AM - ___ (It fluctuates) - School 

3:00 PM I return home from my netball/badminton team and eat some fruit

3:30 PM - I get into sleep clothes (yes, early I know)

4:00 PM - I exercise for 30 minutes

4:30 PM - Have a bath to get rid of grossness

Nothing for a little while

10:00 PM - Read two chapters of a book!

10:30 PM - Prepare for bed

11:00 PM - Zzzzzz

 

 

4) Do you have a Daddy and/or little? 

 

Yes, I have a Daddy and he's wonderful.

 

5) How much of your relationship is sexual? 

 

While the actual DD/lg aspect of our relationship isn't particularly sexual I would say that we are both quite sexual and sexuality does play quite a big role in our relationship, that being said I do believe we could manage being platonic also. 

 

6) How does this effect your interaction with your family, friends and society in general? 

 

It doesn't, to be perfectly honest. People see me as a mature, well-spoken, no-nonsense kind of person and I very much doubt they even think I am a little unless they know me extremely well.

[Guest Princessaj]

Hi, It would be nice to know more about you.

I think you might get better participation if you shared some of the following...

 

1. What year in school are you?

2. What is your major, minor?

3. What class is this for?

4. What was the directive of the assignment?

5. How did the teacher/prof support the assignment?

6. Within that directive, why did you choose DDlg?

 

You are asking a lot of us, it would be nice to know your backstory. Thanks

[Guest CollegeStudent0008]

About me:

 

1) Sophomore in college

2) Major in theater Arts but switching to psych next fall

3) Human sexuality

4) to research a topic if human sexuality and learn about it. these will not be presented to a class

5) she thought the topic was broad but told me if i was interested to go for it

6) its something Ive been hearing about a lot and i wondered why there were so many negative opinions about it. When ever i hear a bunch of negative crap about something, i automatically want to learn more.

Edited December 7, 2016 by CollegeStudent0008

[Guest CollegeStudent0008]

General Background:

CGL stand for Caregiver/Little. More commonly known as Daddydom/littlegirl, this relationship style is one of the many sub-genres of BDSM.  While there are a plethora of websites for those interested in  CGL, finding actual research seems to be quite difficult. Much research can be found about BDSM but this off shoot that seems to have a rather large following is relatively ignored. And while BDSM so slowly becoming more accepted by the general public thanks to books like Fifty Shade of Grey (McGreal, 2013) CGL is still regarded as taboo. The general society regards CGL as an aspect of pedophilia, or even incestuous fantasies. Rest assured, the large majority of CGL partakers consider pedophilia deplorable and try to keep pedophiles out of the community.

Considering this, some the information in this paper has been taken from websites and individuals that promote and participate in CGL relationships. Based on a series of questions asked these were the findings: The Caregiver (i.e. Mommy, Daddy) provides the Little with emotional support in the form of nurturing and other types of care that may include: feeding, dressing, bathing, playing games and some even include a sexual component. The little allows themselves to be taken care of and provides an innocent and youthful outlook on everything that the Caregiver seems to enjoy. This can be compared to the more sexualized Dominate/submissive roles is BDSM. But while BDSM can include punishment and humiliation, CGL is gentle and loving.

Why they Do It:

Many littles report that they escape into a so-called ‘little space’ because, as one little put it: There's nothing better than giving up control when you find yourself being the boss all the time to let someone else make the shots. (DDlg Discussion, 2016). Others say that they use it as a way of self-comfort when they feel upset.  On the other side of things Daddies partake in the relationship because they enjoy meeting the needs of the Little. one such Daddy said this on the topic: ‘I take care of my little, because I like providing security and comfort to her. Making sure she is safely taken care of and feeling happy. I also like helping her set and reach goals she would find difficult doing alone. Building her up to become the best version of herself. And it's not a one-way street either. My little appreciates the care and support and does her best to do the same for me.’ (DDlg Discussion, 2016).

Boundaries and Relationship Management

Another way this ties back into BDSM is the fact that rules are set up to define the relationship. Some BDSM couples even sign contracts that list the rules and punishments for the rules. These limits are usually established formally as rules. Rules are different for each couple, usually made up by the Daddy.  They are used to maintain relationship boundaries and keep Littles, in their childlike space, in order. When rules are broken punishments are administered and while in BDSM these punishments usually have a sexual aspect to them, CGL punishments are more similar to punishments received as a child such as: spankings, groundings, internet or phone being taken away, no candy for the day, sitting in the corner with nothing to do, writing lines, etc. The misconception is that it's for the little to get horny, which is not the intended purpose.

 

Conclusions

CGL differs largely from BDSM and isn’t nearly as sexual. But there is no 'average' CGL relationship and no official research to help define it. Until more research is done we may never know the full story and never appreciate the depths of these relationships.

General Background:

CGL stand for Caregiver/Little. More commonly known as Daddydom/littlegirl, this relationship style is one of the many sub-genres of BDSM.  While there are a plethora of websites for those interested in  CGL, finding actual research seems to be quite difficult. Much research can be found about BDSM but this off shoot that seems to have a rather large following is relatively ignored. And while BDSM so slowly becoming more accepted by the general public thanks to books like Fifty Shade of Grey (McGreal, 2013) CGL is still regarded as taboo. The general society regards CGL as an aspect of pedophilia, or even incestuous fantasies. Rest assured, the large majority of CGL partakers consider pedophilia deplorable and try to keep pedophiles out of the community.

Considering this, some the information in this paper has been taken from websites and individuals that promote and participate in CGL relationships. Based on a series of questions asked these were the findings: The Caregiver (i.e. Mommy, Daddy) provides the Little with emotional support in the form of nurturing and other types of care that may include: feeding, dressing, bathing, playing games and some even include a sexual component. The little allows themselves to be taken care of and provides an innocent and youthful outlook on everything that the Caregiver seems to enjoy. This can be compared to the more sexualized Dominate/submissive roles is BDSM. But while BDSM can include punishment and humiliation, CGL is gentle and loving.

Why they Do It:

Many littles report that they escape into a so-called ‘little space’ because, as one little put it: There's nothing better than giving up control when you find yourself being the boss all the time to let someone else make the shots. (DDlg Discussion, 2016). Others say that they use it as a way of self-comfort when they feel upset.  On the other side of things Daddies partake in the relationship because they enjoy meeting the needs of the Little. one such Daddy said this on the topic: ‘I take care of my little, because I like providing security and comfort to her. Making sure she is safely taken care of and feeling happy. I also like helping her set and reach goals she would find difficult doing alone. Building her up to become the best version of herself. And it's not a one-way street either. My little appreciates the care and support and does her best to do the same for me.’ (DDlg Discussion, 2016).

Boundaries and Relationship Management

Another way this ties back into BDSM is the fact that rules are set up to define the relationship. Some BDSM couples even sign contracts that list the rules and punishments for the rules. These limits are usually established formally as rules. Rules are different for each couple, usually made up by the Daddy.  They are used to maintain relationship boundaries and keep Littles, in their childlike space, in order. When rules are broken punishments are administered and while in BDSM these punishments usually have a sexual aspect to them, CGL punishments are more similar to punishments received as a child such as: spankings, groundings, internet or phone being taken away, no candy for the day, sitting in the corner with nothing to do, writing lines, etc. The misconception is that it's for the little to get horny, which is not the intended purpose.

 

Conclusions

CGL differs largely from BDSM and isn’t nearly as sexual. But there is no 'average' CGL relationship and no official research to help define it. Until more research is done we may never know the full story and never appreciate the depths of these relationships.

[Guest Princessaj]

Thank you so much for sharing your findings. Her are a few notes to consider please...

 

A fact that is important, that is missing, is the DDlg relationship has to be between two consenting adults, legally +18 years old.

 

Also,

 

You..."Rules are different for each couple, usually made up by the Daddy."

 

Rules can be proposed by either the Daddy or the little.

There has to be "full and mutual consent" for a "rule" to be established.

 

Thanks so much.

[Harley_Quinn]

Me and daddy are in our roles when we engage sometimes. Not always. Usually when it's in a sexual form daddy is a massive sadist so it's kinda hard to be causing severe pain to someone and still nurture them (in our personal opinion not in everybody's case)

 

And I am a masochist. So I just want him to cause me pain and not worry about actually hurting me. We view it as love towards each other. Pain is love.