advice needed

[jeffa184]

How do you tell a little her daddy doesn't want her anymore. She hasn't seen him in like 4 months he stopped responding and seeing her on occasion he'll message her. How do I tell her that he's moved on but not destroy her. But also let her know she has a daddy waiting to really take care of her and not abandon her like he did. She loves him so much and says she won't give up. She's almost killed herself cause him I need advice here bad.

[Guest LicklePrincess]

I would suggest you/she has a read of this.

 

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/11758-ghosting-or-slow-fade/

[lilsnoopy]

Gently... very gently... I've been in her positions. Except I saw him every day and half the time I got just enough attention to have hope but never enough to be happy. I torn myself up trying to be this perfect girl and be exactly what he wanted and it was so unhealthy for me... I wish someone would have stopped me sooner or tried to tell me to stop. I didn't see it at the time I always thought things would change and they won't. She deserves better. EVERY LITTLE deserves better. 

[jeffa184]

Thank you she deserves so much more than that all littles do. I may not be perfect but believe every little deserves a daddy that wants to spend time with. They want to be with their daddy and when their daddy doesn't show or blows them off they hurt. I want to show her there are daddies out there that want to be with their little I just hope she will see it and not be hurting anymore.

[HeCallsMePrincess]

yes, tell her gently. be there for her as a friend, and possibly more if that's what she needs. there's really nothing more painful, so be prepared for her to deny it or defend him at first. just be patient. 

[Daisies&Donuts]

Remember that her defense of her previous Daddy is also a defense of herself. She doesn't want to think badly of him because that feels the same as saying "I make bad decisions". Admitting you've been used feels the same as "People are only interested in me if they can use me". Admitting you've been abandoned feels like "I wasn't worth sticking around for". Aside from the pain of loss, there is the pain of losing your self-worth.

 

I would actually advise (strongly) against putting down her ex. Instead focus on building her up and reminding her how awesome she is and how many people know that and appreciate her - especially you

 

But remember this, too. What she might really need right now is a friend. Don't pretend to be her friend if all you want is to be her Daddy (yes Daddy is your best friend, but she might want a *platonic* friend). Be upfront about your intentions. If you aren't you will only make things worse for her when she feels like this person who's been standing beside her was only doing so to get what he wanted from her - used again.

 

Good luck to you both!

[DaddysMonkey]

Hello there !

 

Firstly , I would think it is not healthy if she has said she has almost killed herself because of him. Daddy or not , it sounds like an unhealthy situation.

 

With that being said , after her being in such a situation ... jumping into another relationship probably isn't the best for her either. If your intentions are to date her and be her Daddy eventually , I think you should tell her up front and be honest with her.. BUT , be her friend first until she has healed thoroughly. If things are rushed , she could very easily resent you and feel like you took her away from a Daddy she wanted very dearly. 

 

Of course , you could let her know that you as well as probably many other people are here for her. People care about her , and won't abandon her. I am just very adamant about not rushing into something new right away , is never healthy.

 

So , I hope you take time to consider things and talk with her on a friendly level. 

 

Hope this helps !