Gf doesn't feel butterflies, only when little?

[MrDad]

Hi All,

 

Me and my gf have been dating for quite some time now, one year. She is a little, and I adore every aspect of her. I tell her stories every night on facetime to help her fall asleep, get her new stuffies every once in a while, help her with her studies, make sure she's eaten for the day, etc. She has been saying she wants to be a 'free butterfly' lately, which is fine to want some space but she is saying she's not physically attracted to me? Not my face, she thinks I am attractive, maybe my size, which shouldn't matter if you truly do love the person you're with, totally changeable if put in the time. She says she doesn't feel butterflies for me, which is alright, I mean in every relationship butterflies are not going to be apparent 24/7, even newly married couples don't feel butterflies for each, but a warm feeling in their heart instead, etc. That butterfly feeling is when certain chemicals are awakened and it can happen randomly, 1 week into, or 10 years into one, it's a feeling derived from hormones synchronicity which isn't love, though it can be a cause of it but not a correlation to it. So, a common misconception with love. However, she did admit that she does feel butterflies for me when she's little. She is a leo, which means her deep self is this premature kitten and her self, her mask is this roaring lion - to get a bit of more perspective. She's proud to admit she is confusing, contradicting which concerns me, and is very introverted. I'm in love her, or I wouldn't be writing this, she's my little queen, warrior, princess. Do you guys/girls have insights, that you could share with me? Everything is appreciated.

[MrDad]

I'm 140 lbs btw, mostly lean

[Guest LittleLexiKitty]

id say you need to sit down and talk with her about how shes feeling, although little and not little does have different feelings, atleast for me. You need to get down to why she feels that way, and see where you two want to go from there. even though you do take care of ure little (and im sure u do) if shes not attracted to you (as uve said) you two need to discuss it and come to a decision on what to do.

[Johnny Hammersticks]

Just be yourself, be you own man. Dont try too hard to be what you think she wants you to be. Be a strong confident man. You might have to give her some space, but dont read too much into the butterflies thing. If they come, they come. You trying too hard to make them come, wont do it.

 

Strength, confidence and independance are the traits that will attract her mostest.

[Lil' Miss Dolly]

Totally agree!! Confidence is sexy.

[CrazyLittleBuggaBoo]

Just wanted to say that people can be totally head over heals romantically in love and not have a sexual attraction to that person. Love is love and lust is lust. You need to make time to talk to her about this. All you can do is be true to yourself, and don't just try to be what you think she wants just to keep her. Have a real heart to heart talk about your wants, your needs, and your feelings. By your, I mean both of your feelings. Don't ever try to be someone that you think someone wants, you'll never be happy without being true to yourself. Relationships can be funny things. You need to talk about what you want/need out of your relationship and be willing to work with the other persons wants/needs. Romantic love and sexual lust are to different things. Maybe you would be ok letting her have a sexual partner, maybe you'd be ok with having a non sexual relationships, maybe as time goes on she'll became more sexually attracted to you. Some people don't have any sexual feelings for people unless they have a romantic bond first, some people feel a stronger sexual drive with a stronger romantic bond. 

[Mr. Walden]

in my experience with alot of women.. confidence is a huge turn on. desperation will do the exact opposite. this is regardless of body type, 140 and lean or not.

 

if she's not feeling "butterfies" (and if that's important to you both), you cannot force it.

 

just communicate with her. if she's not receptive to you and still wants to be a "free butterfly" or whatever, move on.

 

 

WF